Jew Talkin' To Me? with Dan Patterson

[00:00:00] Hello Philip. Hi Rachel, how are you doing? I'm okay. I still have my post viral cough but

[00:00:04] part of that should really find how are you? Yeah, not too bad thank you not too bad. Nursing

[00:00:10] whatever cold still lingers but we got half term coming up next week so every minute up until then

[00:00:17] is a gift. Obviously that's not true. So here's a little bit true. Well normally we each have a

[00:00:24] most Jewish thing of the week to share but on this occasion we've literally shared them because

[00:00:30] we had the same one. We did not by coincidence but there was an event that we were both invited to

[00:00:35] and we went along representing ourselves and Jew Talkin To Me. So you might have seen it mentioned

[00:00:41] in the press or heard it on the radio or even on social media but Marcel Noble decided to create

[00:00:48] an amazing art installation at JW3 where he turned the entrance way from the street into the building

[00:00:56] into a love lock bridge and if you don't know what a love lock bridge is it's all around the world

[00:01:01] they've got in different countries bridges where people normally go with their partner and they've

[00:01:06] been scribed a padlock which they attach to the bridge and it's a way of like signifying their

[00:01:10] commitment to being together forever but this one was to remember the hostages in Gaza and you could

[00:01:17] either just sign it or you could dedicate it to an individual person they had one up for each of

[00:01:22] the people and there was a ceremony in different Jewish personalities spoke and shared their thoughts

[00:01:28] and it was actually incredibly moving. It really was it was so nice to be part of something that

[00:01:34] felt like we were we felt like we were bringing together a group of people with a shared experience

[00:01:40] to send a message out to the world and just a chance to say to people don't forget the hostages

[00:01:45] you know there's a lot of stuff in the media at the moment about Israel about Gaza about

[00:01:50] anti-Semitism in the UK or around the world and actually it often feels that the the memory

[00:01:55] of the hostages is being drowned in a lot of that noise so it was really important to be part of

[00:02:01] an event like that some of the speakers and the dignitaries that were there were you know people

[00:02:07] from Dame Maureen Lickman to Howard Jacobson to Josh Howie a former guest on our show but for me

[00:02:14] the most moving encounter I had was with Sharon Lipschitz who was the daughter of one of the hostages

[00:02:21] and just hearing her strength and her fortitude at this time was really very moving for me.

[00:02:26] Yeah she read out a list of the people from her kibbutz who were still hostages and after she

[00:02:32] said like her father's name and then every time she said another man's name she said also my

[00:02:36] father and every time she said like a young man's name she said also my brother and every time

[00:02:40] it was also my mother and it was it was really emotional because I think this whole situation has made

[00:02:46] Jews feel very connected to each other in like we are family it doesn't really matter in a way

[00:02:50] what your politics are but unfortunately the state of the world is bringing us all together

[00:02:55] and I guess that's one of the reasons why we decided to re-nunch the series now is because people

[00:03:00] do want to be connecting and you get to hear about the lives of different Jews. And also we aren't

[00:03:06] a hugely political show which means sometimes people just want to hear Jews talk about being

[00:03:10] Jewish what it means for them culturally socially without having to immediately descend into an

[00:03:15] argument about who believes what politically and geographically so that's really important to us.

[00:03:21] There were some amusing parts of the experience as well which I guess lightened the mood quite

[00:03:27] nicely. For me I think there's a bit where you do the photo call so I wouldn't consider myself

[00:03:32] in any way a celebrity but I guess by doing this show we've been given a platform and that's

[00:03:36] really nice we were able to represent by being there but when they had the photo call that had

[00:03:42] a lot of the dignitaries and invited guests in I did the right thing and let other people move

[00:03:48] forward so if they were slightly shorter than me or if I felt they were perhaps more significant

[00:03:53] to the cause than me whether it was one of the more famous dignitaries that was going to get

[00:03:57] more media attention or someone like Sharon who needed to be visibly there at the front.

[00:04:02] So I found myself edging further and further to the back of the photo call actually if you look

[00:04:06] in any of the media online where the main photo has been published you can just make my head

[00:04:15] I didn't want to make a big deal of it I was holding up my padlocks you could still see the

[00:04:18] important part of why we were there. It was just a moment of humour for me that I was there going

[00:04:23] hello hello when really we were not the story I guess at times you just need some kind of light

[00:04:30] hearted moment. My funny moment actually was when they did the individual photo calls for you to come

[00:04:36] and clip your padlocks to the bridge and I was so anxious because I was 100% convinced I was going

[00:04:42] to either drop the key through the slats of the bridge and it would just like plop down to the floor

[00:04:47] below or I was gonna not attach it properly then the padlock would drop off and everyone would be

[00:04:52] touching you'd roll your eyes and be like a typical and I'd have had to then have sent somebody

[00:04:57] to go and get in it would have been a whole bath. I was really really worried so I managed to get

[00:05:01] it on first try very impressive but then I was so relieved that I'd done it but I forgot to

[00:05:07] then turn and look at the cameras or do any of the stuff I was meant to do for them to do the proper

[00:05:12] photo and I just like yeah I haven't ruined this but I did have a due talking to me moment on

[00:05:20] Sunday. What was that? Well from half past two the Lovelock Bridge then became open to the public and

[00:05:26] only walk a couple put their padlocks on it and I met this lovely lady a non-judged lady had come

[00:05:32] up from Sussex because she wanted to show her solidarity and support. I ended up chatting to her with

[00:05:38] my friend Claire in the cafe for a while she was telling us all about how isolating could feel to

[00:05:43] be a non-Jewish supporter of Israel and of us as Jews so she felt compelled to come and join in

[00:05:50] and all the while she was eating a biegal. And Claire said to her are you enjoying your bagel

[00:05:55] and I said biegal and she said what do you mean? So I explained to her the whole thing about

[00:06:01] bagel versus biegal but she said that she would go with my expression because she felt I was more

[00:06:07] authentic so I gave her one of our team biegal badges and she put it next to all her other

[00:06:14] allyship badges that she had on so now there's a woman supporting Jewish people in a church

[00:06:21] in Sussex wearing a team biegal badge. Excellent or there's a woman in a church in Sussex telling her

[00:06:27] fellow congregants how intrusive Jews are in North London. I'm talking about intrusive Jews

[00:06:35] what a great link why don't you have a quick chat about this week's episodes? This is probably one

[00:06:40] of my most favorite episodes in terms of just we always tell our guests that there's no real script

[00:06:45] to this. We've got questions we want to ask but if we end up going off on a tangent it's really not

[00:06:49] a problem that's the joy of a conversation like this. Dan took us at our word and ran with it. I

[00:06:54] would say within a minute of the episode starting he had huts the entire conversation and didn't let

[00:07:00] it go until the very end and when I say that I literally mean the very end regular listeners will

[00:07:07] know the point I'm talking about when we get to it it was a lovely episode they're really funny

[00:07:12] very very interesting talking to him. Lots in common as well with the to my youth movements and

[00:07:18] talking about the joy of singing the songs and so on and very generous for this time as ever.

[00:07:23] Absolutely the conversation flowed so long we suddenly realized we'd been talking for two hours

[00:07:28] and we tried to keep this to a one hour more or less show so we've edited out the bits that

[00:07:35] we're worried will be litigious because we told too many very naughty stories about what we used

[00:07:39] to get up to at summer camps. So for those of you that remember summer camps and for those of

[00:07:43] you that wish you'd been on summer camps sit back and enjoy the show.

[00:07:55] Hello I'm Philip Simon and I'm Rachel Krieger we are two Jewish comedians. I'm orthodox so in my youth

[00:08:19] movement when we sat around the campfire we'd seen Geshe Tseurmaud and eat bizzily and I'm

[00:08:24] reformed so in my youth movement when we sat around the campfire we'd seen crocodile rock and

[00:08:29] eat marshmallows. This show is the audio equivalent of improvisation you never know what's going to

[00:08:34] happen we're always open to suggestions and quite often someone's left going yes and in each episode

[00:08:40] we chat to our favorite Jews about their lives and experiences growing up and how much

[00:08:44] Jewishness plays a part are they American pie or auction pudding. Welcome to Jew Talkin'

[00:08:50] Amie. Let's introduce our guest he's a playwright, producer and creator of shows including

[00:08:58] whose line is it anyway mock the week in room 101 it's done Patterson hello hello I was

[00:09:04] delighted what you said about the youth groups because I was the first one playing American pie

[00:09:09] in my youth group and when I did it that song was quite new but I never did that I was not a great

[00:09:15] fan of the marshmallows I could got too sticky. I knew about you and the Cumzitz guitar playing

[00:09:22] because obviously we know each other from Lim Mood festival where you are famous for bringing

[00:09:26] your guitar and sitting down for a little jam with American pie etc etc yeah I do well I love doing

[00:09:32] that I've always loved doing song leading and I used to do it at have on him camps and you learn

[00:09:36] I mean it's a bizarre set of songs you know songs from out you know the 60s and the 70s we had a lot

[00:09:42] of anti-war songs we used to sit there playing in anti-vietnam songs way after the Vietnam war was

[00:09:49] finished and it was a bizarre collection that the people who were my madras him you know they love

[00:09:54] folk music it was very privileged that we got to know a lot of songs and there's a guy called Simon

[00:09:59] who I used to do the things when I've done them at Lim Mood with him where we sort of do these

[00:10:03] things and I'm in a group called Joan of the Wailers and we do barmits for some weddings and things

[00:10:08] usually our own is rather than anybody else's but we also get that me and my brother Phil and Joe

[00:10:14] Brooks and Simon Styles and it's it five of us yeah I love that no matter what youth movement you

[00:10:19] went to like could be a harmonium it could be Benerkeva it could be Studge Group it could be whatever

[00:10:25] we all used the RSY song book that was like the main guides when we were teenagers because

[00:10:31] what happened was there were two people in Habonim who took over RSY I think in the late 70s early 80s

[00:10:38] maybe mid-80s and made it very similar to how it had been in Habonim so I think that

[00:10:43] she wrong was very close to the Habonim one maybe the difference was the Habonim Kibru songs were all

[00:10:48] from the 1940s it was yeah sometimes I play a song to Israel isn't they both that laughing because

[00:10:54] you know that's like playing green sleeve you saw I mean it just so

[00:10:59] these things but there's a certain group of songs and I always joke if somebody says do you

[00:11:03] know this song and I go next after 1973 so I have no idea what it is but you know it was nice to

[00:11:08] see my kids all went to RSY so seeing in the in the RSY song book songs of the 80s and 90s

[00:11:15] and things which I thought were tremendously modern but just meant they weren't 40 years out of date

[00:11:19] 30 years out of date I was RSY so obviously you're welcome for the song book but it was that

[00:11:26] thing where you went each year to the summer camp and then a really big part of it was opening up

[00:11:30] the song book the sheron for the first time and working out which songs were new and they never got

[00:11:36] rid of old really old songs you'd have Maxwell's silver hammer and then you've got psychokiller

[00:11:43] it was such a bizarre psychokiller with so far into the few for us and then you've got someone

[00:11:49] trying to work it out on the on the guitar as they're sitting around the campfire one poor kid

[00:11:54] trying to work it out on the guitar I wanted to tell you one terribly embarrassing thing was when

[00:11:58] I was a kid I made up this little slightly embarrassing song which I'm not going to repeat but

[00:12:02] it was called Little Red Songs and I used to sing it in my brother you this song anyway somewhere

[00:12:07] and I meet somebody with no next and I said well are you in have one name and they said yeah

[00:12:11] and I said my name they said oh you wrote Little Red socks and this appeared in the have on

[00:12:16] him sheron in the have on him song book and everybody was thinking that I said well can you sing it

[00:12:21] and she sang it and I went oh tunes a bit different to our members you know that's just because

[00:12:25] I'm told death I tell you I was mortified that this song that's like your moment of absolute fame

[00:12:32] well there's only two things I will be remembered for one is that and one is that I wrote this thing

[00:12:37] with Mark leverson actually called the conscience play which was in have on him for years and it's

[00:12:41] every generation of people who've gone through it have done this at some camp and people always

[00:12:46] know that play it was quite a serious thing we did it in a tent in about 1980 or 81 and it won

[00:12:52] a prize somewhere and I haven't seen it since we wrote it I feel like we should do it now except

[00:12:56] for none of us have prepared for it I think now's the time to tell you we're not actually recording

[00:13:00] and we could probably sing Little Red socks if you'd like to I'm just between us two embarrasses

[00:13:07] me just the kind of thing that should be left with the infamily folklore but I love the way that

[00:13:14] these kids are all kind of singing it seriously I'm going oh my god that's my brother Ben that

[00:13:19] I'm playing that on him I do think the songs that we sang at some camp were the most militant you

[00:13:24] would find us so you'd join in with it you'd do all the different voices different parts whatever

[00:13:29] used to have I've got the actions we did into it too great Jewish song they taught us actions and

[00:13:34] claimed it was sign language wow well we don't think it was we could do for swing love but

[00:13:40] have one it was very left wing very socialist and we had one song which was to the tune of

[00:13:46] green grow the rushes and it was red fly the banner zone and I can't remember all the words but

[00:13:51] we honestly I think it was ten for the days that shook the world nine for the days of the

[00:13:55] general strike eight for the eighth red army wow ten for the days of the working week six for

[00:14:01] the total puddle martyrs five years of the five year plan four for the years it took them three

[00:14:06] three the rights man two two the workers hands working for us living oh one is work as unity and

[00:14:11] ever more shall be so but we were really thinking about five years of the five year plan and four

[00:14:15] for the years it took them and going how about the tens of millions they killed doing it I mean

[00:14:20] we could have sung that for example but wow I mean that's a good song but it's no little red socks

[00:14:25] it's no little red socks I'm telling you this is now going to be the thing it's going to turn

[00:14:28] little red socks into a surprise number one was it was was little red socks like a l'mense about

[00:14:34] this poor sock that gets left in the washing machine no no I wish it had that much paythorcent

[00:14:41] structure no if I'm telling you you're not going to get it out of me it's just too embarrassing

[00:14:47] to be in the UK when I was growing up and I think still really was apolitical like in other countries

[00:14:54] it isn't but here it was an apolitical youth movement so we did sing some of those songs but also

[00:15:00] we did lots of really like well-meaning activities there was one called bureaucratic breakfast that's

[00:15:06] when I remember very specifically that you did every year at camp a bureaucratic breakfast was

[00:15:10] supposed to be so we understood how it felt to be a refusenic in Russia so like a Jew who wasn't

[00:15:15] allowed to practice their religion or get out and they were being sent from pillar to post so

[00:15:19] you know you'd go and to get your breakfast you'd try and get a bowl and they say you can't

[00:15:22] get a bowl so you've got a wheat to mix can't get a wheat to mix so you've got a spoon you can't

[00:15:26] just be it was I don't know why we sort of knew oh that's like fondly we thought oh that's coming

[00:15:30] up soon what a terrible thing well all I'm hearing from that is you had wheat mixed results

[00:15:36] and correct we had cornflakes that was it often we had our morning tea in a cup that smelled of last

[00:15:42] nights vegetable soup because yeah there was no proper washing up but can I also say on the youth

[00:15:48] group from think about it recently there was no health and safety what so I'm not

[00:15:53] hungry how people didn't die because we used to have a we would dig what was called a bog pit this

[00:15:59] was a pitway all the effluence was emptied into and there was also another pit which were all

[00:16:05] the food waste was and then we would do these things playing games at night called a wide game where

[00:16:10] everyone was running around and every year somebody would thought every year and I remember there

[00:16:17] was one guy a madras said to the kid why did you fall in the bog pit and he said I wanted to see

[00:16:23] how far I could lean over without falling into it but how do people not die I just don't get it

[00:16:30] I remember we played a wide game as friend of mine is very tall and they blew the whistle to start

[00:16:34] this wide game and he ran into a metal plow and in my mind it was like in a cartoon where he just hit

[00:16:40] it with his head and he was out cold and this sort of thing happened all the time I think it's

[00:16:44] marvellous now I'm sure they don't do this now but at that time yeah I'm sure they have much more

[00:16:49] health and safety I remember when when I was on one of the camps we did it was a camping one normally

[00:16:54] we were in schools and you had dormitures and things we were campings we had portalus and I was

[00:16:58] the head cook on this camp which also would suggest that no health and safety has gone into this

[00:17:04] whatsoever I must have been just in my early 20s and suddenly I'm head cooked but I had access to

[00:17:11] the portalus before anyone else arrived so I took one and I put an out of order sign on it

[00:17:16] and that was my toilet for two weeks and if anyone saw me sneaking in I'd have to be

[00:17:22] oh I'm just checking it I've got to check it's still not working yet not working when they came

[00:17:27] to empty it after week one the guys are like oh this is out of order I'll get to that

[00:17:31] like no don't worry it's fine it's just my little thing and then I can festive it on the last night

[00:17:37] by giving this whole speech to the camp about what I had done and to this day people still

[00:17:42] reference it as the prank they remember that was played well I have my own personal toilet

[00:17:47] and was this a hessian we sort of had a hessian now we had that bog tend no no these

[00:17:52] these are properties they had proper toilets you know what I'm talking about portalus

[00:17:57] it was portally with blue liquid it's like a smurf adored in yes and whether which he probably

[00:18:02] worked by the way flies everywhere and oh god it was not in mine my toilet there were no flies

[00:18:09] we had like sort of barrels with toilet seats on and you had to put kind of lie or something like

[00:18:14] powder on top of what he thought there was no flashes there was no blue water there was also

[00:18:19] no flushes no no no we were not dying on there we're done a flush we have this pessian sack

[00:18:27] when my younger son who's like now nearly 19 when he started going to camp and they had like

[00:18:33] portalus I was so angry and then he said they had disposables I said what do you mean do you

[00:18:39] not do washing up do you don't have torrents and do you washing up and he said no you just check

[00:18:42] it all in about that I went absolutely mad I like I called the mark was up there he was like

[00:18:47] well about the environment I don't care about the environment I just think he should have to wash

[00:18:50] stuff up my first cam proper when I was 13 I went two weeks without going to the loop

[00:18:56] I was just so horrified by the loop two weeks I mean you couldn't do that now but I also

[00:19:01] wanted to help it safety there was this guy who decided one day to wake up everybody this

[00:19:06] was going to be a hilarious thing to do with one of those huge mallets that used to put up a marquee

[00:19:11] and he was going to go bang on the side of all the bell tents with this mallet and in my mind he

[00:19:18] was doing this and the next thing was some john's ambulance taking out a kid who'd been standing

[00:19:23] up within the bell tent and he smashed on the head while he was waking everybody up the same guy

[00:19:29] by the way we did a camp in Holland whereby we had to take kosher e-dang cheese into the country

[00:19:35] and the customs were incredibly suspicious of this I mean it was actually to the place where they made

[00:19:40] it but there was a sort of place and it had a pond in front of it we green algae and it was sort

[00:19:45] of dusk and the group after us arrived and this guy Arthur came running up to us I mean let's

[00:19:51] be standing there watching in my being silent as well watching him just run into this pond which he

[00:19:57] thought was a lawn because it was up to his neck in this thing and none of us had the way we're

[00:20:03] with all to say stop don't run into that because it's a pond but this is what it was like it was I

[00:20:09] mean it was I see made it all who we are yes we have a strong memory of my husband's mark his cousin

[00:20:15] Benji was in my year in BA and he was always very naughty and up to pranks and stuff but I do

[00:20:20] remember that we were at camp it was winter camp at some boarding school and the summer we were

[00:20:25] intense and the winter being a school and someone shouted from like the bottom of where the

[00:20:29] dorms were really loudly quick quick rise mints built a raft and then we all watched him like he

[00:20:35] just gathered bits of stuff from around the campers and he was like floating out onto his massive

[00:20:40] ponds like what you're talking about I mean it was made of what bits of string and chewing gum

[00:20:45] and like someone pipe in a box and whatever and we just all watched him sort of floating floating

[00:20:50] and sinking and sinking well everybody watched the rafts in my friend Jibrot spent two days

[00:20:56] making a raft for the camp which then all the kids were on it and it sank yeah they should have made

[00:21:01] them out of marshmallows that were unbreakable they're talking about youth groups

[00:21:10] what was the affiliation of having him because obviously R.S.W.I.'s reform the A is too much what was

[00:21:15] we was in reform and it wasn't author it there wasn't a lot to religion at all I mean on a Friday night

[00:21:22] you know we do a cabalatia bat with some songs and somebody would probably read an am frank reading

[00:21:28] or something yeah we had a theme for a camp every year I mean the camp that I remember very

[00:21:32] when I was 13 our one was the Aztecs so we had to get up every morning and say yeah I know it was

[00:21:38] sort of not Jewish I know just this one year they didn't do Jewish but we had various ones we had

[00:21:43] the Steckle but I don't think we had much religion there was a lot of you know sort of Rua and

[00:21:49] Jewish spirit and there was quite a lot of you know educational stuff but it didn't tend to be

[00:21:55] based sorry and we absolutely didn't do grace abdominals we did I mean all my cousins who were

[00:22:00] at Spanneckyver can do the whole of benching I'm always incredibly impressed not just the short

[00:22:04] little bit you do but the whole thing and then 10 extra songs that you shove on at the end we were

[00:22:10] the banging on the table and yeah no we would have thought this was just absurd but I like it now

[00:22:18] I like a bit of benching but we didn't do that we were too serious I get although I had to say

[00:22:22] it was and I'm sure it was the same at your youth groups the thing that held it together I think

[00:22:26] was a sense of humor I think if you had a good sense of humor you thrive there and I remember laughing

[00:22:32] hugely and it's also great for creativity that when you're a madrid you had to come up with a way

[00:22:36] to do an educational program with the kids and you had to find creative ways to do it and you know

[00:22:42] when you think of all the things youth group games it gave us the ability to talk in front of groups

[00:22:46] to be creative to be confident to have I think a greenhouse effect because when we were kids we had

[00:22:52] madrid him who were all doing drama and history and art and music and we have them giving us all

[00:22:58] that time and attention in a way that I think you didn't have unless you went to a sort of drama

[00:23:03] school or music school or whatever so I think we all have a lot to thank for youth groups you

[00:23:08] couldn't have had a better sort of informal education absolutely don't know whether this is

[00:23:14] going to get me into trouble or not but we took with the whose line is there any way book of games

[00:23:19] to the one count the thing with whose line was that there's one game which we took for

[00:23:25] have on him called camp Charlie where somebody put their arms through or whatever but I remember

[00:23:29] somebody is my maybe my friend Kenny they did a scene I think it was David and Goliath and they

[00:23:33] did it straight and then they said do it again but do it very fast and then do it again with

[00:23:37] it slow motion and that had a real effect on me I thought you know I just thought that was the

[00:23:42] funniest thing I'd ever seen and the most incredibly different thing I'd ever seen.

[00:23:46] You see one of the things for us about have on him was I went to an all boy school and

[00:23:50] suddenly you're going to have on him where there's girls and it was just fantastic in that regard but

[00:23:55] can I also say you bring up whose line that as a sort of neurotic Jewish guy full of angst

[00:24:01] you could not have a show that was less suited to my temperament because the beginning of the

[00:24:06] night you have absolutely nothing and most of what happens you can't control and it is utterly terrifying

[00:24:13] so this is why I look this old right you know I have found 35 years of whose line and it is

[00:24:18] absolutely terrifying there's no other word and it maybe became less in the last you know once we

[00:24:24] got to America and really knew what we were doing and had people that you know you just knew but when

[00:24:29] we started off we obviously have brilliant people like Josie Lachon sessions Paul Burton, Tony

[00:24:33] Satri, Sandy Tox, Mike McShane, Greg Proupes all wonderful all brilliant but we didn't know how to

[00:24:40] do it quite as well then so I mean the thing that I still remember this day was you know about our

[00:24:44] third series we decided to do it in New York so it was a really bad idea but I thought we got so

[00:24:49] many Americans on the show let's do them their home territory and we're doing it in New York and of

[00:24:53] course nobody knows any English performance so none of them know Josie Lawrence none of them know

[00:24:59] any of these people so all the people by this point were quite big stars in England and therefore

[00:25:04] come out and as you will know from doing stand-up if people know you and they're excited to see

[00:25:09] you they're already you've already won half the battle and suddenly nobody of Josie Sessions who was

[00:25:14] incredible in England just utterly went down the pan and in those days we do like eight games and then

[00:25:21] we finish and then I do another eight games after eight games of this one the first one in America

[00:25:26] we had nothing just nothing had worked so I was busy with the director and the people I've in

[00:25:31] the box game right let's do this game let's do this game and the floor manager said you better come

[00:25:35] down everybody is leaving and it is the most terrifying thing that I went down and there was

[00:25:40] half the audience left and I said please we have finished I begged them to stay because obviously

[00:25:46] you can't do improv without an audience you know if you think a sitcom you could do it and then

[00:25:50] conceivably dub something but can't do improv without it and that is my worry dream even now

[00:25:55] but even now if I'm stressed about something I dream that the audience is just leaving and it just

[00:26:03] is the most terrifying terrifying thing so we're getting a sense of what kind of Jew you are obviously

[00:26:09] yes the the hub and in thing your background there the angst ridden Jew you know that Rachel's Orthodox

[00:26:14] and I'm reform but outside of showbiz and outside of the youth groups what kind of Jew are you

[00:26:20] well I don't go to shul very much but I belong to a very good synagogue very wonderful people

[00:26:27] let's reform I didn't grow up reform I grew up in Oxford which is traditional I'm in Oxford does

[00:26:33] have this amazing thing that they have one building which is shared by the Orthodox and reform so on

[00:26:39] any showbiz you can go there and then one part of the building there'll be an Orthodox service and

[00:26:44] another part there'll be reform and they get on very well and they'll come together at the end there's

[00:26:48] no animosity which I always thought was great it's a wonderful community my mother's very old

[00:26:54] and they come and visit her they take the stuff it's it's gone a lot of people I mean the weird thing is

[00:26:58] you know that any single girl you grew up in you were the youngster you were the kid and now you've

[00:27:03] turned into one of the altercats I mean it's just you know that's the terrifying thing and also

[00:27:07] I like I like happy clappy I have to admit arts on table I am Dan Patterson and I like a happy

[00:27:14] clappy service so I like it get tough or I like piano or less or I don't mind in organ but to me

[00:27:21] the thing that lifts me gets me more spiritual is music that is when I can feel a magic

[00:27:28] and in Oxford they really didn't have this and everybody's singing their own key and chanting away

[00:27:33] there's a lot of very good synagogues I go to Ramsey for people's bar mitzvahs and stuff you know

[00:27:39] but people just do their own thing it's the Orthodox thing I'm just dabbing your own thing

[00:27:43] and having been 35 years in reform I'm very used to a congregation doing everything together

[00:27:50] you know if you do caddish everyone does it together it's that thing rather than being on your own more

[00:27:55] I can I tell you one my synagogue story which I won't mention the synagogue but I went along to

[00:28:00] the shore and they said if you got a phone and I went yeah and they said what are you gonna hand it in

[00:28:06] and I'm very as you know from trying to set up the zoom very technofob my whole life is on this

[00:28:11] phone I don't know how to copy it if I lost my phone I'm dead and I went no I'm not going to hand

[00:28:17] in but I've turned it off and they said no you've got to hand it in and I went no I've turned it

[00:28:22] off and they said but you might turn it back on and I went I'm about to get a shoo if I tell you

[00:28:26] I'm turning it off I'm not gonna lie I'm turning it off they said no you can't and I said

[00:28:31] what I'm not coming in and I walked off and then I thought this bluff of mine isn't really

[00:28:36] working because I have to go in I was just furious I was just furious I thought this is just

[00:28:43] ridiculous anyway afterwards I was talking to people and they also what you should do what we do

[00:28:48] you should just say you haven't got your phone with you and I went so the first thing you want me

[00:28:52] to do when I go into synagogue is lie and have a phone but not say that I've got a phone anyway

[00:28:58] that's my Larry David kind of moments of forget this sake Dan just handed in your phone but it was

[00:29:04] this moment of saying well I won't come in then and the guy okay so don't come in we don't care

[00:29:09] don't come I was like ah okay that was my final gambit there if he's not going for that then I'm

[00:29:16] stuck I never heard of being asked to hand it in like in school you know like this registration

[00:29:22] well I was just very irritated by going I'm getting my word that I'm not gonna turn it on but I

[00:29:27] don't want I want it on me I want here look I want this in my pocket so I know I have all that

[00:29:33] information and you're not gonna lose it and that was it also it's kind of thing to make that the

[00:29:39] rule you had to hand it in because they might say there's no smoking inside and give us your

[00:29:43] cigarettes give us your e-cigarette whatever they trust you on some things they also don't trust

[00:29:48] people not to take photos or I don't think it's the photos I think people apparently do switch them

[00:29:53] on I mean I went to a wedding not there it was actually at West London a lovely wedding very very

[00:30:00] very nice family but I was sitting there and Man United happened to be playing Arsenal that

[00:30:05] and there were friends behind me who were all Arsenal fans I'm a Man United fan and so I had one of the

[00:30:11] go yes I was really enjoying this and now I'm just annoyed and then there's another thing where they

[00:30:20] went man United people I said you're fine and then Man United I think went ahead and they went

[00:30:24] it's extra it's injury time for injured shark we're gonna win this and then you hear yes and

[00:30:29] then you hear another yes and so they won three two and my whole experience of this bar mitzvah

[00:30:35] was these Arsenal fans behind me on their phones watching their team beatmite team if they didn't

[00:30:40] want to be spotted all they need to do is shout muzzle tov instead when they were there will be great

[00:30:44] muzzle tov when it hasn't happened yet when they're just walking around that he was never brought

[00:30:51] us in the side I'm so excited for this wedding yeah I would I want to know what happened in that

[00:30:57] shore the one where you have to hand your phones in like there was clearly some it's a very wonderful

[00:31:02] show and I know a lot of great people there so I don't want to cast this version because they are

[00:31:07] very good I go there by the way they do a great kid I mean they're hairy I love a good

[00:31:13] herring I love herring in obstacle when I was growing up this may be unfair and maybe it's changed

[00:31:18] but as a kid I remember there wasn't much it was like peanuts and crisps and things whereas

[00:31:23] some of these things in London you have trillent and you have that you know the whole thing an

[00:31:27] a-lif you know it has has its herrings and all this sort of stuff I've asked some of these

[00:31:32] in the gold can I just turn up for the kid and they always say yes but then you feel you can't

[00:31:37] inside you can't do that Kenya it's just done so my community at one point I had the nickname

[00:31:43] JFK because I would turn up just like it is that's great

[00:31:50] well we've been talking a lot about the past but you're the most Jewish thing that's happened to

[00:31:55] you recently then I want to just delve back into into this because one of the things that I find

[00:32:01] is when you fly to a normal country so you say you're gonna Sweden or you're gonna Iceland or

[00:32:07] you're gonna France you're gonna just somewhere normal and you get on the plane everybody's got

[00:32:12] just the right amount of hand luggage to put into the overhead thing everyone just puts it in

[00:32:17] and it's calm and they sit down and that's fine when you go LL or anywhere to Israel everybody has

[00:32:24] brought a fridge wish they wouldn't want to pay to check in so they've got the fridge and

[00:32:31] nine use suitcases of live chickens which they're all trying to put into the overhead lunch and

[00:32:37] you know I have to say that I like to get on a plane very early so I know I've got my bag in there

[00:32:42] and this is always a fight it's always a fight and I was on a plane to Israel and it was on

[00:32:48] pay stuff wasn't actually the day of pay stuff but it was during eight days it was easy to get and

[00:32:53] they said we've got a Jewish option which is a smoked salmon and cream cheese bagel

[00:32:59] but this is this is tragic because they've really tried you've got to say they've got a Jewish

[00:33:04] option how lovely but I went up to the guy and I said I bet you haven't sold many of these today

[00:33:09] and he said no usually we have a whole lot but nobody's going for this today and you just go

[00:33:14] I wanted to praise the effort but maybe there just wasn't quite the education they're

[00:33:18] knowing what was gonna work during pay stuff I suppose another Jewish thing it's more the

[00:33:22] answer inside I guess but I can't fly anywhere so I just flew to Australia over Christmas and I

[00:33:29] can't go anywhere without spending 50 quid in boots before I get on the plane because I'm just

[00:33:34] going well I might need that I might need that and here's my admission this is like my

[00:33:38] different sometimes mission is my mission I cannot go anywhere without a packet of a modium

[00:33:44] right despite the fact that in my life I've probably had the runs really badly once or twice

[00:33:51] when I was I mean it just never happens but I have a modium and the reason I have a modium is when

[00:33:56] I was on my year course thing I was going from ashgalon to Jerusalem with my friends Simon and Kenny

[00:34:00] and we'd had a lot of fruit is from friends of my parents and I got on the bus and within 15 minutes

[00:34:06] I knew I was in trouble I was in real real trouble on this bus and I don't know if you've been through

[00:34:12] this but you're sitting there going the St. Louis River how how and this was at a time when

[00:34:16] the trip you've saved the driver can you please stop because I and they just wouldn't no one was

[00:34:20] stopping so we got to do some by this point I'm sweating and I say to Simon just find me

[00:34:25] a cubicle find me a cubicle I don't care where just find me and I remember dashing in and so I

[00:34:32] was banging on these doors and finally one of them opens and it's a heragi guy and again in my

[00:34:37] imagination he drags him out throws me in complete relief obviously no toilet paper so I had to use

[00:34:44] the Jerusalem post that was my real sort of you know connection that was my what's it called when

[00:34:53] you have to do I think at a fraternity hazing no I think you go through an initiation that was my

[00:35:00] initiation whole thing that's why to this day I go nowhere without a modium can I ask why you go

[00:35:06] nowhere without a modium but you rely on the fact there will be toilet paper wherever you go

[00:35:10] that's a brilliant question you just have to raise your post touch on your arm I don't

[00:35:14] I don't know I now have many different papers on me no I just I usually have sort of tissue

[00:35:19] knocking around but I find maybe this is just a change in the world and we aren't about the

[00:35:24] really significant stuff to them I'm aware of that but maybe there's just more toilet paper

[00:35:28] in cubicles I've when was the last time you're in a cubicle where there was no toilet paper I don't

[00:35:32] remember that I don't recently happened to me recently what did you do I did what women do which

[00:35:38] is you cool out and someone passes it under the cubicle door so is that why we call the festival

[00:35:44] pass under there was a Jewish story I wanted to tell this is something that is sort of connected

[00:35:50] to a memory is only night for my own bum its for my father was a great guy and he taught

[00:35:55] hebra docs he taught modern hebra lecture post biblical Hebrew very learned a very nice very

[00:36:00] quiet very calm you know I went up to bed and I called him I'm a sound really nervous that I you

[00:36:05] know I don't know how I'm going to do and I just can't sleep he said look you're going to be

[00:36:09] absolutely fine I will be on the bimmer behind you and I will be there and if necessary I will guide

[00:36:15] you through it don't worry and I said thanks dad lovely moment shut my eyes went to sleep great fast

[00:36:21] forward I don't know however many years 25 30 years and my own son is the night before his bum its

[00:36:27] for and he's you know he's very nervous as well very edgy about the whole thing and remembering this

[00:36:32] I said Louis it's going to be fine I'm going to be there with you I will be standing behind you

[00:36:37] on the bimmer and if necessary I can guide you through it but you know nothing

[00:36:43] I thought why can't I have these codec where was why can't these wonderful moments you know

[00:36:49] that you see in dramas and things why can't they happen to me it's just I was there and he was

[00:36:54] a bit of course there was absolutely nothing I would have been able to do but these are the things

[00:36:58] are maximum stress something Philip stand up has got a lot of quite similar stories about his

[00:37:03] boys I think I've had to reign it in a bit actually people have started offering me help after

[00:37:09] gigs when I talk about just how awful it can be I've got a nine year old and a six year old I love

[00:37:15] dearly but they are a challenge I do this theory that whenever we go anywhere by time we leave

[00:37:21] that place everyone in that place knows my children's name because there's so much angst and

[00:37:31] but they're great you know they're wonderful I wouldn't be without them a friend of Michael Adam

[00:37:35] on his bar mitzvah he said that he was up there and he was facing the hall and he was doing his

[00:37:41] piece he suddenly saw his father and uncle and some cousins jump up and go dashing off and he's doing

[00:37:47] his piece and then he sees them all come rush him back in each carrying a box this is the bag of

[00:37:52] each carrying a box and I've just found out that they've gotten any wine for the kiddish and they'd

[00:37:58] all gone to the nearest office and doing his bit as they were well we've all got those stories out

[00:38:10] it does sound like there's a lot the stuff going on like to do with being Jewish and stuff in

[00:38:14] the past in childhood we always like to check in with our guests and find out how they're doing

[00:38:19] and ask the very important question what's the matter bubbler so Dan what's what's going on in your

[00:38:24] gears right now there's two different things there's two different things one is just getting old you know

[00:38:29] just being older the things that you used to be able to do you know making noises when you sit

[00:38:35] down making noises if you bend over making noises I mean just getting out the bath is just getting harder

[00:38:42] I find that you know all things that you would do in the past and you'd absolutely bounce off

[00:38:47] and I look at younger people and I am quite envious of that I don't think I'm growing old with

[00:38:51] grace you know I'm just full of bitterness in envy so that's one thing but the other thing

[00:38:57] and this was sort of coming up because I have a lot around Christmas time is people putting

[00:39:02] all in newspapers things saying the 50 best commas is of all time best 50 best comedy films if

[00:39:08] is there any do a TV by the way my stuff it yeah even there was one on TV on channel 4 it was the

[00:39:14] best hundred improv moments ever I've done I think the one show of improv of that sort of thing

[00:39:20] that's really worked both here in an American round the world surely I'm going to be you know

[00:39:25] I'm going to be in the top 10 I surely so at about 97 was one bit from whose line and they didn't

[00:39:31] ask me they asked the guy at that time who directed it and I was like how do I get on an improv best off

[00:39:37] but those camp dance always drive me out for two reasons one is the best comedy is always

[00:39:44] something like it hot which drives me crackers because while I think it's a very good film

[00:39:50] because Billy Wilder made great films it's not the best comedy it's not funny it's just

[00:39:55] not even the apartment is more funny than that it's just not funny I go have you never seen

[00:40:01] airplane or naked gun or groundhog day or life of Brian or meet the pair so all these

[00:40:08] were and of course no because they're lower brown so no we got to do something this high brow because

[00:40:12] it's Billy Wilder and I'm going Tony Curtis decides two thirds of the way through the films for

[00:40:18] on a carry ground accent which he carries on doing all the way now fine he produces that I've

[00:40:22] gone Tony it's gonna be fine for a couple of lines but it's gonna be a milstone let's drop that shall we

[00:40:28] it's brilliantly constructed let's say it's Billy Wilder was brilliant but it's just not funny so

[00:40:33] that's one of the ones that annoys me and I know I should let this drip over me and let

[00:40:38] you know my father used to say let it wash over you but I can't it just a not all they have the

[00:40:42] I mean I know it's sort of not piecey anymore but they have the top 50 Woody Allen films

[00:40:47] and when all the ones I liked are about number 25 and 25 I'm going right this is just ridiculous

[00:40:52] because what you're gonna put on the top and not his best films and I know I know my

[00:40:57] around comedy so these things dry I guess it's other people's opinions I think other people's opinions

[00:41:04] are increasingly annoying me it's other people's opinions because obviously depends who's voting for

[00:41:09] these things or is it a PR push no it's usually one person these days one person it's some critics

[00:41:16] I get by the way critics I mean that's another thing that really annoys me is I've got to the point

[00:41:20] with a guardian critic and one or two others film critics I should say did if they like a film

[00:41:26] I won't like it vice versa in fact with most film critics I guess the snobbiness you know this

[00:41:32] year I think the holdo was this fantastic I think American fiction is fantastic but I will be very

[00:41:38] surprised if they want anything because they're not seen as waiting I come you know the score says he

[00:41:44] wants to call killers of the flammu or these things I'm sure they will do but I just think with

[00:41:48] the world in the state it is aren't we okay just laughing or just having a story that's great

[00:41:54] you know where's the steam where's amadeus where's moon fellers I mean I know good folks in the

[00:41:59] opinion you laugh I'm just saying a fill with a great story I just want to escape into a wonderful

[00:42:05] film have I hit the right oh yeah absolutely and I love what you're saying about the countdown thing

[00:42:11] of the best of so please get you on the podcast just before purim obviously because we're bringing out

[00:42:16] our top hundred guests that we've had and you're you're in the running you're very

[00:42:23] running now I'll say that and was between now in the end of this podcast I thought you were going to

[00:42:27] say we're bringing here are ten top festivals and there could be a countdown you know because surely

[00:42:35] everybody's favorite it's got to be pizza hasn't it the say tonight isn't that full of wonderful

[00:42:39] memories I think my dad he used to a great say to my mother was always going David we got to get on

[00:42:45] with it the chickens burning whatever is this call gonna be too well done and he was talking about

[00:42:49] doc soldiers and how rabbi Kiva said this and the fact is they were probably plotting the bar cop a

[00:42:55] rebellion on this picture yeah all the stuff that he used to bring out and I just have such wonderful

[00:43:00] happy memories of say this and when you're a kid you know staying up that late you know and it was

[00:43:05] just yeah so it's exciting and you didn't have a kid's hug a dart in those days I don't know whether

[00:43:11] that's good or not did you not have the one with the um bit sick of polo and almond

[00:43:15] yeah yeah the except that obviously somebody had pulled it to hard three years earlier so we

[00:43:21] didn't really move out of the basket yeah yeah and also hiding the afficoment you know and all

[00:43:26] of that this is so magical and people saying why don't we have eggs in the salt water

[00:43:31] every day of the year you know all these things that everybody says and everybody's doing in

[00:43:35] their own ones that one and Hanukkah I think Hanukkah has really strong memories for me

[00:43:41] of something very you felt very safe and cozy and excited and then with the people's

[00:43:46] there and you had your presence that to me was very magical you know I'm sure I should say

[00:43:51] Tishbaab or Shabuata or something but or what's it called Simhap Torah where you walked around with

[00:43:57] a flag which had glitter on it and an art thing with open and there was a slightly main G-Apple

[00:44:03] all the apple yes the flag the apple do you want that and a candle on the top we used to do in a flag

[00:44:08] with a wooden stick and an apple and then a candle or a lit candle well how's it saved me why is

[00:44:16] going on yeah and nothing happens like I don't remember going up loads of sweets on the way out

[00:44:22] you've got well also this is another thing in Oxford I don't know if it's the case now but when

[00:44:26] I was growing up nobody threw sweets and then when I came to London to start again to other places

[00:44:31] everybody threw sweets I just this still happens I always think it's kind of dangerous with Simhap Torah

[00:44:36] it was that we got sweets on the way out it was however was Katana Torah Buraychi or whatever

[00:44:40] that was they would give out like a Kit Katana a Mars Bar or something on the way out as a treat

[00:44:45] but it was at the midst was in Israel that was the first time I saw sweet throwing where

[00:44:50] the kid finishes and then the sweets get thrown but now I have more seducts thing

[00:44:55] that because we always do I mean I don't know I literally never knew they went to

[00:45:00] synagogue until we were invited to the midst of because it was Israel you don't really have to do

[00:45:04] being Jewish because it's it's like being Christian here it just happens

[00:45:07] but do you think though that say am I right in thinking that some of the people who

[00:45:12] will listen to the podcast are not Jewish is this my sound insane that we're walking around

[00:45:17] with a flag with a rotten apple on it and a little thing that opens and you just walk around

[00:45:22] and round with it and that's funny enough in our synagogue in America where we lived for a while

[00:45:27] on Simhat Torah they opened the whole scroll down the corridor so you can see what it was like

[00:45:34] which I thought was fascinating you know everyone held it up and you did it all the way down that's

[00:45:38] by the way another thing you said the most Jewish thing is I turned down what's it called

[00:45:43] where you lift up the Torah what's that called? Padma I turn that down because I thought

[00:45:48] I'm gonna do my back in I am just beginning the old couple ways trying to open the window to

[00:45:54] jump out the hotel room I thought I'm gonna lift it up I'm gonna do my back in I'm gonna drop it

[00:45:59] and everyone's gonna have to fast and I just said no you know thank you for the honor but I'm not

[00:46:04] gonna do it because I will do my back in I just know I'm gonna do you know there's all these

[00:46:07] festival related accidents I mean I you know I don't want to make fun of but I've been to

[00:46:11] quite a lot of funnels lately and I'm always worried that when you do the digging thing

[00:46:16] yeah to throw the soil onto the coffin that I'm gonna do my back in there that it just would be

[00:46:21] a terrible time to do back in if they made a Jewish spin off of casualty that's what it would be

[00:46:27] like it would be Jews sit at home when they're so far watching you know people going into some

[00:46:32] Hattoura with the flags I'm going oh no what's gonna happen here someone's eyes gonna go out

[00:46:36] no I don't get like Torah they'll be like all they're gonna do their back in and everyone's

[00:46:40] gonna have to fast you know there was this program animal hospital I think they should have

[00:46:44] two hospital where people who is related accidents you know things that they've done and you get

[00:46:50] some very nice people sitting around saying so what happened you said well I sat on the flag

[00:46:55] with the Apple you know I did my back in at the funeral the sad thing is that the thing that I go

[00:47:00] to most now you know you go through a period where you go to everyone's bummits for and then

[00:47:04] you have everyone's wedding and then you have a period where it's brisses don't you have I mean I

[00:47:08] know I was at my own bris but I'm gonna say Brit I'm not going down the Ashkelines and I'm gonna say

[00:47:13] Brit you go to these things and you have them and then it's your kids friends bar and bat mitzvahs

[00:47:18] and then weddings and all this stuff but I'm going on a lot of fuels and it's just at the various

[00:47:22] places where you're squeezing you in every half hour so you arrive then you know millions of people

[00:47:27] from the next one with those funerals the back to back funerals that sometimes they remind me of

[00:47:33] you know insure enough the dead there's a scene where they meet another group of friends coming

[00:47:38] the other way who's slightly better actors or slightly more people's actors yeah I sometimes think

[00:47:43] you know you're going to Elevaya which is like an obligation one rather than you really want

[00:47:48] to be there and then you see people coming out who are like all your mates from another fun

[00:47:53] it would have been fun it's one of those things that you're going through at this stage

[00:47:59] we've attended back to back funerals we had to really sit fresh yeah

[00:48:03] who was facing the coffin we had someone it should be a picnic we should have bought a picnic

[00:48:08] they don't cater funerals you have to go to the house but so we we had one I think is about one

[00:48:13] o'clock and one at three o'clock and there was there was crossover but we had to be it both then

[00:48:17] there was a year that we went to the stone setting for my wife's grandparents who had died a month

[00:48:22] the past they kind of did it all same sort of time but we went to the wrong cemetery because we'd

[00:48:27] forgotten where they've been buried yeah can I do another have one in story my brother was at a

[00:48:34] camp I wasn't at this camp but my friend Steve Yenters was those a doctor and my brother who was a

[00:48:38] madrid you know it wasn't like a 13 year old kid he was already 16 17 went up to him and said

[00:48:43] look I've got a problem here and he said what he said my penis is stone blue he said what he says

[00:48:48] it's stone blue I'm dying it's stone blue as Steve said okay so let me ask you a question

[00:48:53] did you just go swimming in the river and he said yes and he said are you wearing blue underpants

[00:48:58] and he went yes and he said are they new and he went yes he said that might be your answer

[00:49:04] you know like him we're a family where we always think it's the worst thing you know Woody Allen's

[00:49:10] line where he says I'm not a hyperconjure but I think whatever I've got is gonna kill me yeah that's

[00:49:15] exactly where I am I always go to the worst stage so my brother was just thinking and my father by

[00:49:20] the way once woke up in the middle of the night to look at the clock you know at a clock radio

[00:49:24] and it was all blurry just couldn't see anything his eyes have gone he wakes up my my my mom and

[00:49:29] said it's gone it's happened I finally you know whatever's happening to me it's happening I can't

[00:49:34] focus on the you know figures on the clock and my mom turned off the light and he was trying to read

[00:49:39] the clock through a glass of water we've talked a lot about food in and out of our stories

[00:49:52] I heard about your funness for a full-on kiddish but as a Jewish mother I do love to hear

[00:49:57] your connection I thought you were going to say as a Jewish mother and I was going I can

[00:50:01] claim some things but I'm not a Jewish mother but you were saying you were a Jewish mother God

[00:50:05] I am a Jewish mother as a Jewish mother myself I love to hear people stories about their connection

[00:50:09] to traditional foods or experiences they've had around Jews and food so do you have any like

[00:50:15] likes dislikes loves hates or stories about Jewish food yes well my hate is and I hate this so much

[00:50:22] that I sometimes wonder whether I am Jewish and I want to do one of these DNA tests it'll be so great

[00:50:27] if it came I wasn't even Jewish and all of this was a waste I mean if you've got my face you realize

[00:50:32] that probably am but I don't like Borscht I just don't like beetroot I don't like it either people

[00:50:38] go on and I'm about oh Borscht if you put the sour cream in it I just don't like it it's never done

[00:50:42] it for me yeah I just don't like beetroot even though I know it's good for you it's good for your

[00:50:47] prostate apparently not to get it up there but it is good but anyway chicken roast chicken Friday nights

[00:50:54] you know if I was on death row there's another happy thing and I have my final meal it would be a

[00:50:59] Friday night I mean you'd have to hope it was on a Friday the day before I don't get into the whole

[00:51:04] scenario this but I just love a Friday night I love the proper thing with I say proper but

[00:51:10] traditional with chicken soup with matzovalls and the whole thing in it and bits of chicken in it

[00:51:16] because boy or chicken in chicken soup is fantastic and then chop liver and then my mother used to

[00:51:21] make the single hazileum which was objín sort of a thing like that but I'm not such a fan

[00:51:27] of the egon onion because I'm not great with onion it's I always think egon onion

[00:51:31] Rachel sounds like a really bad Jewish comedy duo I agree I stab onions and together we're

[00:51:38] egon onion but anyway let's do that our next gig that we're at together let's do a sketch

[00:51:44] with egon onion that just be one person in the corner game what am I chop liver hey

[00:51:49] nice work for me but having the the roast chicken and then afterwards you go and sort of pick

[00:51:54] up the car give yourself that that's my difference but there was also a thing I went to I went to a

[00:51:59] doom and at this do it was like you know a charity event they had a sushi station and I absolutely

[00:52:05] adore sushi and they had a herring station so I was able to have a lot of sushi and I went to

[00:52:10] the herring station I went you know what I think I prefer if really pushed I think I prefer

[00:52:15] the herring I think I actually do and by the way as you say if you look at me I could be anything

[00:52:21] other Jewish I once went because I had a big operation to get rid of a human mice alive

[00:52:26] regland and there was a big scar left and it went keyloid and I had to go and have this thing

[00:52:31] injected and the nurse who is injecting it looked at me and said have you ever thought of having

[00:52:36] a nose job and it was like no but thank you thank you for mentioning it while you're sticking

[00:52:41] a needle in my neck so you know I'm thinking about the my scroll and things like that where they're

[00:52:46] talking about prosthetic noses and you know I had no problem with Bradley Cooper's prosthetic nose

[00:52:52] I didn't notice it after a minute gold and mayor you know gold I had no problem prosthetics on that

[00:52:58] I thought Helen Mirren did a great job I just got over the prosthetics in 10 seconds and thought

[00:53:03] it was great but I've always said I'm a good friend of Jonathan Friedland who is one of my kids

[00:53:07] in Habanim, my my hanikim and I've always said to him he would play me in the Hollywood version

[00:53:13] of my life and he's never happy about that it retakes him I can see that he's going I'm way better

[00:53:21] looking than dad but then I'm going but the people who play you in Hollywood films are always

[00:53:24] better looking than you you know you see Rachel Weiss playing someone whoever it is

[00:53:29] and then you see the real person what was the film about some ritual weiss was in playing

[00:53:34] Deborah Lips that about the whole of course the film is called denial denial Andrew Scott played

[00:53:40] Anthony Julius and he's just brilliant he could just play anything I thought it was actually

[00:53:45] actually there's a guy who was he's a lawyer and he was portrayed in the film by someone

[00:53:49] that sets him on a pedestal he's been played in a movie by an actor it was Rachel Weiss Timothy

[00:53:55] Sporle as David Irving the master's grace I'm probably gonna have to say Tom Wilkinson who sadly

[00:54:02] passed away not he did he did it was great his great performance great Marigold I loved him

[00:54:08] I thought it was great actor that's the thing I mean look there's so much awfulness in the world

[00:54:13] but isn't it terrible people you really respect and loved have gone you know there's for me one

[00:54:20] after the other of the greats of the 1970s when you know that was my formative period in television

[00:54:25] and you know you get Barry Norman going and then you get John Noakes going and then you get you know

[00:54:31] I mean all at different times I know but just giants and they've gone I was very sad about Tom Wilkinson

[00:54:38] going I thought he was just he was terrific that makes me think of the Rebetsons disco at the end

[00:54:43] of Limud Festival where Jacqueline Nichols artist and DJ she puts on an amazing disco but it has a

[00:54:51] segment in it for the Jewish performers we have lost in the year Jewish musical performers and

[00:54:57] that's always like a key moment at that disco oh yeah well it seems to happen more and more

[00:55:03] it seems to happen more and more I'll tell you a thing I'm working on I'm working on a Jewish

[00:55:10] Christ is right so Jewish Christ is right where people from the audience have to come down

[00:55:15] and guess how much an item would be if they had an uncle in the business

[00:55:19] excellent I think now's the time to pitch that show yes

[00:55:26] then they're clattering for Jewish content not on Twitter everywhere else and you know I didn't

[00:55:31] get a broigas do we learn to make broigas your family but what's the difference between a Jewish

[00:55:36] broigas and a non-Jewish broigas about 40 years but it is interesting as I said non-Jewish

[00:55:44] I'm reminded of Elon Gold who's a wonderful Jewish committee absolutely brilliant and he says

[00:55:49] it's so arrogant of Jews to call people who aren't Jewish non-Jewish when it's basically everyone

[00:55:55] isn't everyone and we're saying they're not tiny minority they're everyone else

[00:56:01] we're like 0.0 2% of the world's population but everyone else is a non-Jewish

[00:56:06] well it that I mean that is one of the statistics is 0.0.2 of the world population who are responsible

[00:56:12] for 70% of the anxiety so and that's just in my house I think we punch above our weight in worries

[00:56:19] definitely I'm just conscious of the time you still are right for a bit yeah yeah yeah

[00:56:24] it's quite excellent well particularly now Philippa said there's a countdown you know

[00:56:30] you're doing great but Elon Gold could steal it I'm telling you Elon Gold would wipe the floor

[00:56:35] with my ears very funny can I just say yeah put this on some chat recently but when I was in

[00:56:40] have on it there was a very nice yeah did I mention that have on him draw I should say because

[00:56:46] somebody will say draw we are malgommated withdrawing about 1981 and we have on him draw but anyway

[00:56:52] there was this very nice woman called Ruth Steinman and I once said to Ruth Steinman

[00:56:58] it's lucky that you don't have a sister called Phyllis and she said I do have a sister

[00:57:04] I've been your sister is Phyllis Steinman Phyllis Steinman I mean who does that she might be listening

[00:57:10] and I don't want to you know make this sort of thing but I did think that was a kind of you know

[00:57:14] when parents whose surname is Hamburger and they call their kid a meat and you're just going have

[00:57:19] you thought this through the long term implications of this Phyllis Steinman?

[00:57:23] Ham what have I got any other things I wanted to tell you? I was just wondering what your best musical

[00:57:28] actually was I know it was quite a while ago the reason I'm asking and I'm just saying think about

[00:57:33] Yonster carefully is because Philip and I both come from musical theatre background so this

[00:57:36] is quite an important issue for us guys and dolls is probably my favorite stage musical I think

[00:57:42] there's not a lie here which either doesn't move the plot doesn't move character or it's funny

[00:57:48] and I just think it's so tight and all the songs are credible but I think the film version of

[00:57:52] Oliver was great I think that's although I will get into an argument with various people about

[00:57:57] fagin because I know yeah well I think fagins are terrible character I'm very worried that the

[00:58:03] stage version is coming back because you know the whole thing Ron Moody doing Oliver said I will do it

[00:58:08] but I'm not going to do it like the David Lee in film I'm going to turn fagin into more of the heart

[00:58:14] of the story into a lovable wrote which he did and then since it's come back on stage I really

[00:58:19] worry about the fagin character I think it really drips into anti-semitism and tropes and also I don't

[00:58:25] like it but the actual film with Ron Moody I think is a masterpiece and there's a wonderful

[00:58:31] it's a book called Genius Anxiety it's a terrific book in every regard but there's a chapter about

[00:58:38] a woman a Jewish woman's correspondence with child's dickens about how I submitted a character

[00:58:43] fagin was and although you know it's still not great she did manage to get him to make amendments

[00:58:48] it's a wonderful thing you know it just shows the power of writing and being civil and how sensitive

[00:58:55] child's dickens was that he was prepared to listen to her and make amendments as make a

[00:58:59] man as I should say and it's some very very good I highly recommend that book that's my plug for

[00:59:04] somebody else's work Philips just choking you're right there and you know what's happened is

[00:59:10] the results of the poll have come in and I moved from number 100 down to 99 and you can't believe

[00:59:15] that well is it down to 99 or up to 99 technically well do I get a flake you want the sick

[00:59:22] closest to the bros you know how you can have a plate there's a bath waiting for you well if you turn

[00:59:27] 100 you know in the old days the queen would send you a telegram I guess it's now in child's

[00:59:32] center telegram but I thought if you turn 99 you get a flick very good you know you have to

[00:59:39] rely for that you don't get that automatically no no no my so my wife's grandfather my wife's

[00:59:44] grandfather who died the one that we forgot where he was buried 109 and a half he was you have to

[00:59:49] apply for the card so they did it at 100 I think they did it up to 105 they thought we'll do it

[00:59:56] at the big ones only and you also get a card from the department of work and pensions which feels

[01:00:01] quite passive aggressive yeah it doesn't feel like they're celebrating you so much as wishing

[01:00:05] you would finally pop off because you're costing their money when he died you'd go oh he was so

[01:00:10] close to 110 that would have been a really I mean all I feel is regret all I feel is the

[01:00:18] negative that he didn't make it 110 but I was going to say on the royalty thing my father found

[01:00:23] in a center of Hebrew and Jewish studies in Oxford and there was a fundraiser and I was asked

[01:00:30] to be the after dinner speaker well sorry to introduce the after dinner speaker and I said well

[01:00:35] who's coming you know can I do you know jokes about anyone and they said yes princess and daughters

[01:00:39] coming and I went oh that's all right well I can do stuff what is it Sarah Tindle I can do jokes

[01:00:45] matter so I turned up at this do and I said where's princess and daughter and they went not princess

[01:00:51] and daughter prince has sons daughter and that's a page of material out the window as you are sitting

[01:00:59] there thank you oh no because you know prince has sounded Jordan his daughter was was the guest

[01:01:03] of honorals whatever and I I done all the jokes the wrong jokes funny how you hear things you want to

[01:01:08] do yeah something just to take away it's funny how you hear what you want to hear yeah that people

[01:01:13] are listening to podcasts wanting to hear you know gold but they're hearing damn paton presumably

[01:01:20] if you'd have gone ahead with any material you might have had about princess and instead of prince has

[01:01:24] ham you would have had a bit of a broggus brewing we know you just you said you don't really have much

[01:01:29] in the way of broggus going on your life but the big one I do want to know about even if you're not

[01:01:33] going to share an actual broggus with us we refer to it as the bagel bygill situation so I'd like

[01:01:39] to know which camp you put yourself in are you bagel or are you bygill I'm so bagel I can't even

[01:01:46] begin to think the bygill it's just like I was in America when I was six my father was teaching

[01:01:51] at Cornell University and I was obviously bagel until you know my in laws my wife's family

[01:01:56] and all said bygill I thought they were just taking the piss I had no idea that people actually

[01:02:01] said this but now I'm completely open-minded about it I'm really fine with whatever you want to say

[01:02:07] I also like the ashenazie safari thing because we always grew up although I'm ashenazie we had

[01:02:11] safari pronunciation which is modern Hebrew pronunciation rather than the sort of more

[01:02:17] stetalized biblical ashenazie pronunciation I always like the essence you know like talus

[01:02:23] yeah we always said shabach along we didn't say good shabas he said a talit not a talus so I always

[01:02:29] wondered if Paul Merton the ashenazie for Paul Merton but you know it's a tetanotaph isn't it

[01:02:36] it's a tetanotaph so Jews are all connected in all kinds of bizarre ways like we have loads of

[01:02:44] connections we've talked about Limmerd festival also Philip and I both connected you down in that

[01:02:49] we've been mocked the week's standings so you had this to me yeah but it might have been

[01:02:56] Philip I did it I did it for about seven years and lockdown kind of I did it a little bit during

[01:03:02] lockdown but we met long before that Dan A-Lith because I was the youth worker that A-Lith and I

[01:03:07] was tasked with writing the Purim spiel one year and we met for a drink because they wanted you to

[01:03:13] help me write it and I think your advice was just go ahead and write it and it was great it freed

[01:03:20] me up beautifully so I'm never bill but now that we're doing this I think it was because you were

[01:03:29] doing it later that I was much more involved in the rehearsals and then sort of in the latter

[01:03:34] years I wasn't and by the way in the rehearsals there wasn't any of the real performers there

[01:03:38] right it was just make sure we had the photos and everything so you know I'm not saying that

[01:03:43] the performers come in rehearsal because they didn't so we all have these weird vassais

[01:03:47] connections but who is your most interesting Jewish connection I have two one of them is my cousin

[01:03:55] called Simon Lovestone sir Simon Lovestone yeah he's a sir I know what the hell

[01:04:00] what am I doing but he's a big psychiatrist there's all sorts of stuff about dementia and things

[01:04:06] very very erudite lovely guy but I do this is more tenuous but I have a cousin called Hugh Feather

[01:04:13] that's also a great name so this is my mum sister was his mother but the father was the first cousin

[01:04:21] of Brian Epstein so I'm only once removed so it's my cousin's cousin or my cousin's dad's cousin

[01:04:27] was Brian Epstein's cousin because people's memorabilia are tall because I was too young

[01:04:33] but I was thinking that's pretty good I want to try to say that to Paul McCartney as he was running

[01:04:38] away from me I went to George Martin's funeral don't ask me how but I did and I'm the huge

[01:04:44] Beatles junkie and I was talking to Wix who's part of Paul McCartney's band and I was standing there

[01:04:50] but I was wearing like Beatles time which I wear for various functions when I don't know how

[01:04:54] format is going to be because it's always a good ice break and it's got the full Beatles on it and

[01:04:58] I saw Paul McCartney this is right at the end when people are leaving winning his way towards Wix

[01:05:03] and I'm going I'm about to meet Paul McCartney my life has been leading up to this and he took one

[01:05:08] look at my tie and just walked off in the other direction and I think he would get to say hello to him

[01:05:13] that's one of my big regrets we call this section six degrees of partly bacon and I was trying

[01:05:18] to work out my cousin's cousin's father's cousin's cousin Brian Epstein I couldn't do the maths

[01:05:24] it's not hard it's my mother's sister's husband's cousin my uncle bind marriage cousins okay here's

[01:05:30] the question for you Rachel because you're fairly orthodox in Jewish law is it permitted for a man

[01:05:36] to marry his widow's sister his widow's sister his widow's sister oh his widow's sister yeah

[01:05:43] I don't know what have he got planned why has that come from well I'll tell you why if you think

[01:05:48] it through his widow's sister yeah this means he's been oh you were being clever see he was a

[01:05:54] little trick question there I thought we could brighten the mood bring up listeners you know some

[01:05:59] family for everybody to do and I thought it was a nice little moment a moment you might all have

[01:06:03] expected did you have all those things they're called conundrums it would be like a man pushes a car

[01:06:09] to hotel and his bankrupt you know and then you could ask yes or no questions so do you have that

[01:06:14] to cover endless coaxion is or clear patcher is dead on the floor in a pool of water yeah

[01:06:20] yeah yeah and then turns out clear patches of fish oh a man gets an arm no gets an arm soup through

[01:06:28] the post and then tastes it and then shoots himself something like that and whatever it is it's

[01:06:33] okay no this is what's known as a comedy called sack no it's more that it's really triggering

[01:06:39] remembering those coast turnies a man pushes a car to a hotel and his bankrupt you know what it

[01:06:44] is I'll tell you he's playing monopoly oh I remember there was quite a few where the answer was

[01:06:50] something to do with ice you know like yeah yeah yeah I'm sorry this is all of water

[01:06:58] yeah so it's a snowman one so my kids currently love all these riddles I think so we're always

[01:07:04] being caught out with them the ones you know you're driving a bus you pick up five passengers ten

[01:07:09] passengers you know that one yes all the plane crashes on the border between England and Scotland

[01:07:14] where are the survivors buried yes that those I want that one yeah what's the one here for

[01:07:19] them I'm gonna do this with you okay say roach ten times fast roach roach roach roach roach roach roach

[01:07:25] what do you find a toaster bread I have a nine-year-old child who does all these we say silk

[01:07:32] and we're not meant to say milk you know it's this is this is what got us all into use groups well I

[01:07:37] think this actually leads very nicely to the next question you've already said that whose lines

[01:07:41] in anyway might have been inspired by your time at hub and M so we do want to know how much if

[01:07:46] at all your career has been affected by your Jewishness obviously I think have one in draw was

[01:07:52] a an influence certainly in getting those sorts of things going I mean people exaggerate how much

[01:07:58] it was take your from having an influence but there's no doubt that I really got into creativity and

[01:08:03] comedy a lot through having them not entirely I've also got a scholarship to America and I was at

[01:08:08] a an Arba Michigan and then North Weston and North Weston does this show called the Meow Show which

[01:08:13] actually was improv and that's the first time I never got into improv and that was influential too

[01:08:18] that showed me how amazing improv could be but the Jewishness I think is more the people I knew I

[01:08:23] did all my big shows with Mark leverson and I met Mark in Habonium and we you know we studied

[01:08:30] great friends and we worked together all the way through and he was very critical in getting all

[01:08:34] you know working all these shows with me so I think the Jewishness I could say comedy my family

[01:08:40] love comedy my parents had great senses of humor my parents were both in Habonium and they met

[01:08:45] in Habonium and a lot of their friends were very funny and so I was surrounded by funny people

[01:08:49] when I was growing up so I think it would be more that than anything absolutely direct and also my

[01:08:55] anxiety part of the reason I think I'm not a bad producer is because I worry about everything so

[01:09:00] I always assume I always say you're doing a show assume everything will go wrong and cover yourself

[01:09:06] for that and then if it doesn't you're ahead of the game just people I know you know I'll say I'll

[01:09:11] meet you at somewhere and I always give myself as a producer half an hour in case there's you know

[01:09:17] a traffic jam or the trains aren't running and people turn up half an hour late because they always

[01:09:21] think everything will be perfect so I think good producing is often because you're anxious and a bit

[01:09:28] you know bit of a worry that's probably where the Jewishness comes in. I think someone was saying

[01:09:33] something very similar on last weeks the apprentice you're fired but they were talking about to be

[01:09:39] a good manager of any kind of an event which I suppose TV recordings, radio recordings etc they're

[01:09:44] still events it's about being extra prepared and also ready to think on your feet so you're

[01:09:49] immediately. Definitely but I think it's troubleshooting it's looking ahead and go okay that should

[01:09:54] be fine but if it isn't fine what do we do I remember dealing with an American agent I was doing

[01:09:58] a show here and it requires the labs and the whole show is about this left and we were flying them in

[01:10:04] Serena Williams actually and the agent said oh we've just got a change of plan she's now going to

[01:10:09] fly in and arrive on the day of the recording and I went oh no we can't do that because if there's

[01:10:13] a problem the whole recording is about her you know I can't do anything else and they said worst case

[01:10:19] scenario she's a bit linked. No that's not the worst case scenario that's not great but not terrible

[01:10:25] worst case scenario is the plane gets cancelled and she doesn't come at all that's the worst case

[01:10:30] that you don't have to deal with but I do and I think you know slight pessimism you need

[01:10:35] positiviveness you need positivity I should say to have maybe the design the drive and the hope

[01:10:41] and the thrill of doing something but I think you need the worry and the negativity to think

[01:10:46] that things might go wrong and therefore what are you going to do with that.

[01:10:52] Well that's nearly all we've got time for but how will our audience know what you're up to if

[01:10:56] you never call and you don't write and normally we'd allocate 20 seconds to do this but for you

[01:11:01] 30. One of I got well the main thing I've written a couple of plays which are doing the rounds

[01:11:08] at the moment so I might be doing a read for one of those in the not too distant future so far

[01:11:13] I think it's funny at the moment because there was quite a lot of development time I've been doing

[01:11:18] writing of films and writing of plays I did the duck house 10 years ago with the guy called Colin

[01:11:23] Swash and we did it in London starring Ben Miller and it ran for about six months at the board

[01:11:26] of all theatre and that was incredibly exciting because obviously Summer you haven't done as much

[01:11:30] is more exciting than Summer you do all the time so I just absolutely love that so I'd love to get a

[01:11:35] play on I'm looking for investors I don't know if you're listening investors to do a job

[01:11:41] as a sweet that's right well you've come to the right place yes and then I look I've got a lot

[01:11:47] of stuff going on in America I'm trying to get stuff going on here I think you should write to

[01:11:52] the BBC and say bring back not the week that would be a good thing to do because I would love

[01:11:57] mock the week to come back I really feel we've still got this still got legs it's still got things

[01:12:01] to do the great thing about mock the week was it was a great conduit for new stand-ups to come through

[01:12:07] and stand-ups had the double whammy of COVID which made their lives very difficult and then mock

[01:12:12] the week as I said we were probably us and live at the Apollo are the two main places you come

[01:12:18] through and I think there were lots of great comedians coming through at the moment there's more

[01:12:22] good news than you can deal with and sorry I say good news I mean news that's good for comedy

[01:12:28] I don't mean any of the news is good I would say it can be bad you know but it's a lot of stuff

[01:12:34] that's good for comedy so you know I genuinely wish we were back on because I think you know I

[01:12:38] loved working with that team I love working with the people in our office I love work with Dara and

[01:12:42] Hugh Reese and Ed Milton and Angela and Maisie and all the incredible comedians we had and I as

[01:12:49] I said there's new ones coming through so that's something that I'd really wish would come back

[01:12:53] and I am doing a lot of writing and I'm fine enough thinking of the jokes for tonight

[01:12:57] I did think oh there would be stuff that I'd like to do with your church yeah you know you're talking

[01:13:03] about wishing that mock the week would come back and I just think about the advice that you get

[01:13:07] unsolicited from people who come and enjoy your comedy where they just come up to us and say

[01:13:11] hey you ever like just contacted live at the Apollo and just told them you want to do it I had that

[01:13:16] with you it limured that people kept saying just going towards the Dan he'll put you on mock the week

[01:13:20] and I was like he knows why I'm I'm pretty sure of it that's not how it works that you don't go

[01:13:24] up to someone at a Jewish winter you know holiday camp and just have well also it's a reverse

[01:13:30] because people always think that anybody will be available to do so they say have you asked

[01:13:34] Dawn French have you asked Victoria what it's like yeah obviously we've asked but I mean

[01:13:39] don't want to think so yeah what does that mean and there was one time I went to this opening bit

[01:13:44] of limo where lots of people coming up and saying what they were going to do and this American guy

[01:13:48] god I'm saying I'm doing who's lies anywhere I hear the producer the creator of it's here now yeah

[01:13:51] that's me you just die in front of me but there we go but yeah so maybe that's all you need to do

[01:13:58] down just find someone to write to and I'm sure they'll bring back mock the week that's it all you

[01:14:02] need to do is write a letter I think after that we should have the the play out music with the Jimmy

[01:14:08] Savole one letter is that he's the star of it the time has just flown away I know oh and it's

[01:14:19] like life isn't it Rachel it's like life you're enjoying it then it's gone lovely well I've

[01:14:26] absolutely loved this and will now always think of Dan as the Jew who doesn't want to miss out on

[01:14:31] a countdown unless it's the top 100 songs about little red socks very sweet and as my grandfather

[01:14:37] used to say I love seeing your smiling face arrive and I love seeing your little tuchas leave

[01:14:42] which is a good thing as we've come to the end of this week's show as my grandmother used to say

[01:14:46] if you haven't got anything nice to say say in the edition oh that reminds me Dan we haven't

[01:14:53] done jua lingo so taking inspiration from your grandma do you have any favorite Jewish or

[01:14:58] Yiddish expressions well we didn't grab with much Yiddish in the family we were much more Hebrew but

[01:15:04] I love the word halishing halishing meaning you're salivating that means you're just dying for some

[01:15:10] you're halishing for some herring you're halishing for some chicken I don't know if it just applies

[01:15:14] to food or whether you're halishing to watch a good show but I think it is just food but to me you

[01:15:19] know as with a lot of the edition so evocate with the sounds or whatever but halishing it sounds like

[01:15:24] you've got a mouthful of saliva which as we know is a lovely image that's what I do that that's a word

[01:15:30] you know I love shlet broigas I do think it's a great word I think broigas is just oh my friend

[01:15:36] Mark when we had on him he thought the word seminar was the Hebrew word because we were always

[01:15:41] going off to seminar he thought that was Hebrew when I was in seminary that because that's what

[01:15:46] mean we think of it we had an American teacher and he kept talking about a fillet of fish when

[01:15:52] he was talking about like kosher food he kept mentioning a fillet of fish and because in England

[01:15:57] we like said that we say fillet we all thought fillet must be like a Talmudic term so we all wrote

[01:16:02] it in Hebrew like failureed lumbargea fillet and we kept like trying to find out what it would

[01:16:07] it meant in Hebrew well you know also know this is quite biblical but you know the thing you take the

[01:16:12] statin it's there's a statin I take it's called a tour the statin a tour of a statin yeah and I always

[01:16:18] think that sounds like biblical Hebrew you know tohuvavochu is in Genesis it means you know this sort of

[01:16:24] chaos chaos in the universe tohuvavochu and I think a tour of a statin where do you get statins

[01:16:31] deliver who delivers your statins in New York the statin island fair I am here who's

[01:16:41] the thought we do that statins on this show I mean that's very on brand statin Irish or cars yeah

[01:16:48] all that's left russes to you is to thank our guest Dan Patterson follow him on social media follow

[01:16:53] us on social media at philips comedy at rage Krieger at jute talking without the g don't forget to

[01:17:00] subscribe like and share the show with everyone you know and join us next time on jute talking to me

[01:17:11] jute talking to me was hosted by me philips Simon and me Rachel Krieger produced by Russell Balkin

[01:17:17] and judged by our mothers Phil you philip or philip I'm philip but I won't be offended if called

[01:17:23] phil and we were you ever a Daniel no the only people who call me Daniel are people who knew me at primary

[01:17:30] school and doctors I always know it's a thing we're a fraud thing when they say hello Daniel

[01:17:36] and you're saying all right what do you want because I was always a philip and if my parents ever

[01:17:40] answered the phone at the house back in the days of the landline and anyone asked for a phil they

[01:17:45] were like I've said there's no phil here we don't have a phil well my school my secondary school

[01:17:50] we were all called by our surnames and early on you just didn't know anyone's first name and

[01:17:55] I remember having to call up a friend and the mother answer and I said is with them there

[01:18:02] that's amazing ridiculous when you're like well eventually we got to know each other well

[01:18:07] love that we knew each other's names how did your school handle the multiple surnames because

[01:18:12] we had a family of four they were all called Campbell surname so it was Campbell one

[01:18:16] Campbell two Campbell three and Campbell four and when Campbell one left number two didn't graduate

[01:18:21] so at one point there was just a Campbell four in the school who had no other but it would have been

[01:18:26] worse if somebody being called thunderbird