Our first ever live recorded episode, courtesy of the Cheerful Earful comedy podcast festival!
In this very special episode, we each take a piece of media that scared us as children and unleash it on a live audience.
This was SUCH a fun day, and we are so incredibly grateful to everyone who came out to see us! This was something of an experiment, as we have never done anything like this before, and you all made the experience so fun, warm, and welcoming. We hope to perform again as soon as we are allowed to.
Huge HUGE thank you also to Cheerful Earful who made the whole thing possible (as well as being the nicest people in the biz).
Do excuse the change in sound quality two thirds of the way though - it has nothing to do with CE's sound engineering and everything to do with Elsie being a bad editor.
Hopefully see you again very soon, and have a wonderful Halloween!
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[00:00:00] Hello! Hi! So, just to let you guys know, we've got some very exciting news. We are going to be performing an exclusive one-off live show as part of the Cheerful Earful Podcast Festival in October. It will be on the 20th. At 5pm. At the Bedford Pub. In Ballon. Nice. Tickets are £6. And we would love it if you could come. Tickets are linked in all the social media. Enjoy the episode.
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[00:01:00] Nice of you all to come. I'd like to be applauded in every room I'm in.
[00:01:15] The cameraman came in just before you guys and he came in and went, thoughts?
[00:01:20] As if that's an appropriate way to greet women.
[00:01:23] My good thoughts. I wouldn't recommend it.
[00:01:26] He didn't know what it meant, to be fair.
[00:01:29] Let us know, because we want a little bit of a count. Who knows the podcast?
[00:01:34] Who doesn't know the podcast?
[00:01:37] Oh, sick.
[00:01:38] Oh, hey, one person. Great.
[00:01:41] This is all for you.
[00:01:43] We've got an intro and this is for you.
[00:01:46] So, do you want to explain what we do?
[00:01:48] So, Kids TV. That's it.
[00:01:50] Kids TV. It's not appropriate for kids though.
[00:01:53] We're three housemates.
[00:01:55] We live together. We've been doing this for two years.
[00:01:57] First live show. Very exciting.
[00:01:59] Glad you're here.
[00:02:00] Welcome.
[00:02:01] That's it. That's it.
[00:02:05] So, yeah, we were going to play a game called Spot the Parent,
[00:02:08] but you've all spotted him.
[00:02:09] My dad's already knocked over to her.
[00:02:10] If you can spot the sibling, that's a secondary game.
[00:02:14] There's two.
[00:02:15] There's two in the room.
[00:02:17] So, I played this game.
[00:02:18] I was doing, like, it wasn't this.
[00:02:21] It was like a weird art performance.
[00:02:23] Called Tech Daddy.
[00:02:24] Yeah, called Tech Daddy.
[00:02:26] And my dad was in the audience and I said,
[00:02:28] if you see him, you get a prize.
[00:02:31] And I did the show and I forgot that I said that.
[00:02:33] And then at the end of the show, someone said,
[00:02:36] I found him!
[00:02:38] And I didn't have anything to hand.
[00:02:41] It was just something I said.
[00:02:42] So, the only thing I could grab that was on my person
[00:02:46] was an out-of-date condom that I was using as a prop.
[00:02:51] And so, I said, you can have this.
[00:02:53] And I did, I warned her not to use it.
[00:02:56] Maybe she used it as a prop in her live show.
[00:02:58] Who knows?
[00:02:58] Maybe.
[00:02:59] Anything you could really do with it.
[00:03:00] Do you want to know something sad, though?
[00:03:02] Please.
[00:03:03] It went out-of-date in my possession.
[00:03:06] No.
[00:03:11] Could you imagine the circumstance where Elsie has found a condom
[00:03:14] that's out-of-date and picked it up and kept it?
[00:03:17] It's a comparable one of the two.
[00:03:20] Obviously, it went out-of-date in my possession.
[00:03:22] It's so sad, though.
[00:03:22] Yeah.
[00:03:23] In that time in my life,
[00:03:25] I was doing more art performances
[00:03:28] than I was having sex.
[00:03:30] Is that the same now?
[00:03:32] Which speaks to where we are.
[00:03:33] Yeah.
[00:03:33] It continues to now.
[00:03:35] In our lives at the moment.
[00:03:36] Okay.
[00:03:37] So, what we're going to...
[00:03:38] The way this show's going to work
[00:03:39] is we're going to...
[00:03:41] We've chosen a kids' TV each,
[00:03:44] a kids' TV show each.
[00:03:45] All of them scared us individually as children
[00:03:49] because it's Halloween.
[00:03:50] This is our Halloween logo.
[00:03:53] I got that open five minutes this morning.
[00:03:55] It's good, isn't it?
[00:03:55] I know it's really nice.
[00:03:57] It took hours.
[00:03:58] It's so nice.
[00:03:59] I love it.
[00:04:00] So, it's TV shows that necessarily
[00:04:03] weren't supposed to scare,
[00:04:05] but, you know, something went wrong
[00:04:08] and children were scarred.
[00:04:10] So, we've chosen one of those each.
[00:04:13] See, I definitely broke the rules.
[00:04:14] Mine's a scary movie, so...
[00:04:16] Yeah.
[00:04:17] You watched as a child.
[00:04:18] Laura's not scared by anything.
[00:04:20] Do you know what she said to me the other day?
[00:04:21] She said,
[00:04:22] I've never had a nightmare.
[00:04:24] She's never had a nightmare.
[00:04:30] Like, a week later,
[00:04:31] I had a stress dream.
[00:04:33] No.
[00:04:33] Was it scary, though?
[00:04:35] In a lifetime sense.
[00:04:37] What?
[00:04:37] Because I'd fucked up
[00:04:38] a very important thing in this dream.
[00:04:40] What did you fuck up?
[00:04:40] So, I'm doing a PhD.
[00:04:42] With a PhD,
[00:04:42] you have to prove
[00:04:43] that you've been spending
[00:04:43] your time correctly
[00:04:44] and you do a thing called an upgrade
[00:04:46] where they're like,
[00:04:47] have you been spending this year
[00:04:48] doing academics?
[00:04:50] I thought it'd be more exciting.
[00:04:52] I just had a...
[00:04:53] Yeah, we'll cut this.
[00:04:54] I had an anxiety dream
[00:04:55] that I slept in
[00:04:56] and missed it entirely.
[00:04:57] Okay, so it's not really a nightmare.
[00:04:59] Then I've never had a nightmare.
[00:05:00] Okay, cool.
[00:05:02] Oh, there we go.
[00:05:03] That's living in London.
[00:05:04] So, we're going to play a game first.
[00:05:07] The game is called
[00:05:09] If You...
[00:05:11] What is...
[00:05:13] This isn't the title of the game.
[00:05:15] This is the premise of the game.
[00:05:17] Have you ever had a dream
[00:05:18] where you...
[00:05:19] Oh, everyone got it!
[00:05:22] Unbelievable!
[00:05:22] Unbelievable!
[00:05:23] Okay, so...
[00:05:25] What is the scariest household item
[00:05:29] to be haunted?
[00:05:31] So, I think...
[00:05:32] Mirror goes without saying.
[00:05:34] Right.
[00:05:34] Mirror.
[00:05:35] Yeah.
[00:05:35] That's a horror trope.
[00:05:37] That is...
[00:05:38] Toilet brush.
[00:05:39] Toilet brush!
[00:05:40] I said any plumbing.
[00:05:43] Yeah.
[00:05:43] Toilet.
[00:05:44] Toilet.
[00:05:44] Toilet.
[00:05:45] Anything in the bathroom.
[00:05:45] Usually if I ask a question.
[00:05:47] When you're at your most vulnerable.
[00:05:50] If I ask a question,
[00:05:52] these two are just going to say toilet.
[00:05:56] Yeah, mirror makes sense,
[00:05:58] but Laura brought up a very good point
[00:05:59] about the mirror being haunted.
[00:06:02] So, if your mirror's haunted
[00:06:03] and it's like a mean ghost,
[00:06:05] it can either, like,
[00:06:05] subtly vary your appearance
[00:06:07] to either look better or worse.
[00:06:09] Both are cruel
[00:06:10] because you go out...
[00:06:11] You're going to have
[00:06:11] body dysmorphia either way.
[00:06:13] Yeah, like,
[00:06:14] you go out thinking you look amazing
[00:06:15] and actually you fucked up
[00:06:17] all your makeup.
[00:06:18] The mirror that gaslights.
[00:06:19] Yeah.
[00:06:20] Yeah.
[00:06:21] Yeah.
[00:06:21] Yeah, so, uh,
[00:06:23] toilet,
[00:06:24] any white goods.
[00:06:26] Yeah, like in...
[00:06:26] You don't want a haunted fridge.
[00:06:27] In Ghostbusters.
[00:06:28] We learned that from Ghostbusters.
[00:06:30] I think also you really
[00:06:31] don't want a haunted pillow.
[00:06:32] No.
[00:06:33] Yeah.
[00:06:35] Yeah, shit.
[00:06:36] Any part of the bed.
[00:06:38] That'll give you nightmares.
[00:06:38] Yes.
[00:06:39] Oh, good.
[00:06:41] We're just going to get you
[00:06:41] a haunted pillow now.
[00:06:42] Yeah.
[00:06:43] Brilliant.
[00:06:44] So, yeah.
[00:06:45] What else?
[00:06:46] Has anyone got any other suggestions?
[00:06:48] We want to disqualify a knife
[00:06:50] just because that's obvious.
[00:06:51] The front door would be bad.
[00:06:53] Yeah.
[00:06:54] Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[00:06:55] It wouldn't be good.
[00:06:56] No security.
[00:06:57] Our front door is fucking haunted.
[00:06:59] Why?
[00:06:59] I swear.
[00:06:59] Every, every year,
[00:07:01] twice a year,
[00:07:02] it becomes either
[00:07:03] very difficult to open
[00:07:04] or very difficult to close
[00:07:05] because of the weather, right?
[00:07:07] Yeah.
[00:07:07] It tests your strength
[00:07:08] emotionally and physically.
[00:07:10] It takes two of us
[00:07:11] to close it on some days.
[00:07:12] No, that's true.
[00:07:13] Yeah.
[00:07:14] Horrible.
[00:07:15] But this is just
[00:07:16] housemate chat now.
[00:07:17] It's not.
[00:07:18] Yeah, we don't need the admin.
[00:07:19] Oh, I've got screens.
[00:07:21] There we go.
[00:07:21] There we go.
[00:07:22] Right.
[00:07:22] Shall we crack on
[00:07:24] with a...
[00:07:25] Yeah, what time are we on?
[00:07:26] Go for it.
[00:07:26] Yeah, all right.
[00:07:27] Then fine.
[00:07:27] So the show I've chosen
[00:07:29] is called Step Inside.
[00:07:32] Oh!
[00:07:32] Oh, yes!
[00:07:34] Come on.
[00:07:36] Yeah, we know, we know.
[00:07:38] We were sat downstairs earlier
[00:07:39] and we were...
[00:07:40] Elsie's dress has got faces on it
[00:07:42] a bit like the face
[00:07:42] and Vic was like,
[00:07:44] what's that show?
[00:07:45] And we were like,
[00:07:45] don't remember yet.
[00:07:49] You said,
[00:07:49] oh, you lucky girl.
[00:07:51] Right, let's have a look
[00:07:52] at the intro.
[00:08:21] I'm a robber.
[00:08:25] Oh.
[00:08:25] So Chris Jarvis
[00:08:27] presented a show
[00:08:29] in 2002
[00:08:31] called Step Inside.
[00:08:32] It ran for
[00:08:33] a year, I think,
[00:08:35] and it was two seasons
[00:08:36] and it was 50 episodes.
[00:08:38] All of them
[00:08:39] are on YouTube
[00:08:41] apart from one
[00:08:42] which is lost.
[00:08:43] It's just...
[00:08:43] There was no home media.
[00:08:46] I don't think it was
[00:08:47] well-liked enough.
[00:08:48] I don't think it was good enough.
[00:08:49] I feel like if you scoured Bob,
[00:08:50] maybe you could find it.
[00:08:51] Maybe.
[00:08:52] Maybe.
[00:08:52] Yeah, some hero
[00:08:54] has like archived it.
[00:08:55] No, it's lost.
[00:08:56] It's lost.
[00:08:57] No, we'll see it there.
[00:08:58] So basically,
[00:08:59] it opens
[00:09:01] and it's just a lovely opening,
[00:09:02] isn't it?
[00:09:02] It's nice.
[00:09:03] It's nice.
[00:09:05] No, it's not nice.
[00:09:07] If you know,
[00:09:08] you know
[00:09:09] and we're going to make you know.
[00:09:11] So this is what happens.
[00:09:12] So he does like a little sketch.
[00:09:15] He does a little skit.
[00:09:16] He doesn't say that
[00:09:17] at the beginning
[00:09:18] of every episode.
[00:09:19] That would be very unusual.
[00:09:21] No, in this particular episode
[00:09:23] it was about masks.
[00:09:24] So let's see what happens next.
[00:09:27] I'm just dreading it.
[00:09:28] Oh, don't I look different.
[00:09:38] Listen.
[00:09:40] It's the house.
[00:09:42] There must be a story to tell.
[00:09:47] Get inside all those
[00:09:58] who love the stories.
[00:10:00] Look and listen
[00:10:02] with tales to tell
[00:10:03] of fun,
[00:10:05] excitement,
[00:10:07] magic,
[00:10:07] adventure,
[00:10:08] tears,
[00:10:10] fears,
[00:10:11] and laughter.
[00:10:13] Surprises as well.
[00:10:15] Step
[00:10:15] inside.
[00:10:23] It's incredible.
[00:10:24] You guys know the word.
[00:10:25] I know.
[00:10:25] I wasn't expecting that.
[00:10:27] What's your name?
[00:10:28] Micah.
[00:10:29] M-I-C-A-H.
[00:10:30] Micah.
[00:10:31] Micah.
[00:10:32] That's incredible.
[00:10:33] How did that just like
[00:10:36] embed in your brain
[00:10:37] through osmosis?
[00:10:38] You just watched it that much?
[00:10:39] Yeah,
[00:10:39] it used to get rebranded
[00:10:40] all the time
[00:10:41] on CBBs.
[00:10:42] Incredible.
[00:10:43] For what reason?
[00:10:44] It's a skill.
[00:10:45] It really is.
[00:10:46] They give a 30 CBB
[00:10:47] so they didn't have
[00:10:47] that much options.
[00:10:48] Yeah,
[00:10:49] that's very true.
[00:10:50] That's true.
[00:10:50] So Chris Jarvis,
[00:10:52] not a lot is known
[00:10:52] about Chris Jarvis.
[00:10:54] He's quite a private man.
[00:10:56] And he is one of the original
[00:11:00] CBBs
[00:11:01] sort of continuity announcers.
[00:11:03] Along with Poi.
[00:11:04] Chris and Poi.
[00:11:05] We all know Chris and Poi.
[00:11:06] They're the only ones
[00:11:07] that people still know
[00:11:08] the names of really.
[00:11:09] I mean,
[00:11:09] ask me to name another.
[00:11:11] Although it was my time
[00:11:12] so I wouldn't.
[00:11:13] It would be weird if...
[00:11:14] Yeah.
[00:11:14] Yeah,
[00:11:14] Sid and Sue.
[00:11:16] The other team
[00:11:17] were main presenters
[00:11:17] at the time.
[00:11:18] Why don't you have a podcast?
[00:11:21] If you did it,
[00:11:23] we wouldn't have to do it.
[00:11:24] Yeah.
[00:11:25] This is our burden.
[00:11:27] Yeah.
[00:11:27] Anyway,
[00:11:28] Chris Jarvis
[00:11:29] is not his real name.
[00:11:30] He's called
[00:11:32] Martin Jarvis.
[00:11:34] So,
[00:11:35] yeah.
[00:11:35] It's a much better name.
[00:11:37] Obviously for equity reasons
[00:11:39] he had to be,
[00:11:40] he had to go by
[00:11:40] his middle name
[00:11:41] because Martin Jarvis
[00:11:42] human teddy bear
[00:11:44] is already
[00:11:44] a much beloved actor.
[00:11:46] I have a quick question
[00:11:47] about equity.
[00:11:49] Does the name thing
[00:11:50] reset when they die?
[00:11:54] All the rehearsals
[00:11:55] we've done of this
[00:11:56] and she's not thought
[00:11:57] to ask this
[00:11:58] where we could Google it.
[00:12:00] Google it.
[00:12:01] Yeah.
[00:12:03] Actually,
[00:12:03] do it now.
[00:12:04] No,
[00:12:04] because...
[00:12:04] Use your phone.
[00:12:06] You've got two screens.
[00:12:06] All right.
[00:12:07] So that's a very good question.
[00:12:09] Chat amongst yourselves,
[00:12:10] I guess.
[00:12:10] So,
[00:12:11] in our
[00:12:13] Thomas the Tank Engine
[00:12:14] episode,
[00:12:15] thank you very much,
[00:12:16] we spoke about how
[00:12:18] if you arrived
[00:12:19] on the Isle of Sodor
[00:12:20] and you found
[00:12:21] sentient trains
[00:12:21] with faces that big,
[00:12:24] you would revere them
[00:12:25] as gods.
[00:12:27] Now,
[00:12:27] this face
[00:12:28] is the size
[00:12:30] of the entire wall
[00:12:31] and I do think
[00:12:32] it's a similar
[00:12:33] kind of concept
[00:12:34] but something
[00:12:35] that Meg pointed out
[00:12:36] is that it's got
[00:12:36] a lot of skin detail.
[00:12:39] Like,
[00:12:40] it's quite
[00:12:41] textured.
[00:12:42] There we are.
[00:12:43] There it is.
[00:12:44] It's a bit Doctor Who,
[00:12:46] isn't it?
[00:12:46] It's a bit
[00:12:47] 2000s Doctor Who,
[00:12:48] yeah.
[00:12:48] Face of bone,
[00:12:50] silence in the library,
[00:12:52] robot things.
[00:12:53] Very much.
[00:12:54] Donna Noble
[00:12:55] has been saved.
[00:12:55] Yeah,
[00:12:56] no.
[00:12:56] It's like
[00:12:57] in a foundation advert
[00:12:58] if that's the before face.
[00:13:00] The Thomas faces
[00:13:01] are like the after,
[00:13:02] like they're very porcelain.
[00:13:03] They're very beautiful.
[00:13:05] They're very beautiful.
[00:13:06] Fuck off.
[00:13:09] So yeah,
[00:13:10] that's the house.
[00:13:10] Should we have a look
[00:13:11] at what happens
[00:13:12] in the house?
[00:13:13] In the,
[00:13:14] what we have to assume
[00:13:15] is its stomach.
[00:13:17] Is it my breath?
[00:13:22] It is red.
[00:13:25] It must be nice
[00:13:26] to know
[00:13:26] what you look like.
[00:13:28] Have you never seen
[00:13:29] yourself in a mirror,
[00:13:30] Boris?
[00:13:31] No,
[00:13:31] never.
[00:13:32] I've no idea
[00:13:33] what I look like.
[00:13:35] There must be a mirror
[00:13:36] around here somewhere.
[00:13:39] I can tell you
[00:13:40] what you look like,
[00:13:41] Boris.
[00:13:41] You've got shelves
[00:13:42] and big eyes
[00:13:44] and funny Greek hair
[00:13:47] and a mouth
[00:13:48] that looks like a book.
[00:13:49] Oh,
[00:13:51] you sound quite handsome.
[00:13:53] It must be nice
[00:13:54] to know
[00:13:55] what you look like.
[00:13:56] Can I tell a story?
[00:13:58] Yeah.
[00:13:59] Um,
[00:14:00] my mum and dad
[00:14:01] have got some family friends
[00:14:02] and when their little girl
[00:14:04] was really little
[00:14:05] they started taking her
[00:14:06] to ballet lessons
[00:14:07] and they pulled them aside
[00:14:09] one day and said
[00:14:10] she's getting very distracted
[00:14:12] by the mirror
[00:14:13] and this is when they
[00:14:15] learn that
[00:14:17] there's no mirrors
[00:14:18] in their house
[00:14:18] at her height
[00:14:19] so she just didn't know
[00:14:20] what she looked like.
[00:14:23] And when we asked her
[00:14:24] what she was getting
[00:14:25] for Christmas that year
[00:14:26] she said
[00:14:26] a mirror.
[00:14:28] I was really excited
[00:14:29] about it.
[00:14:30] Didn't you,
[00:14:31] she told you,
[00:14:31] she was like,
[00:14:31] I'm so excited
[00:14:32] I'm going mirror shopping today.
[00:14:34] Yeah.
[00:14:34] It sounds like
[00:14:35] it's violating human rights
[00:14:36] doesn't it?
[00:14:37] Like she didn't know
[00:14:38] what she looked like.
[00:14:39] And she's adorable.
[00:14:40] Yeah, it's like a right
[00:14:40] that you never thought
[00:14:41] that you are grateful
[00:14:43] to have.
[00:14:44] Like...
[00:14:44] But she doesn't have
[00:14:45] a mouth that looks
[00:14:46] like a book.
[00:14:46] No, no.
[00:14:47] So yeah,
[00:14:48] those are the characters.
[00:14:50] Something that we need
[00:14:52] to talk about
[00:14:53] is the fact
[00:14:54] that the cat said
[00:14:56] we saw you
[00:14:57] looking in the mirror.
[00:15:01] What does he mean
[00:15:03] by that?
[00:15:04] Like,
[00:15:05] so this guy
[00:15:06] is not the owner
[00:15:08] of the house.
[00:15:08] He's the groundskeeper.
[00:15:10] Yeah.
[00:15:11] So it raises
[00:15:12] a lot of questions.
[00:15:13] Like,
[00:15:14] who is the owner
[00:15:16] of this cursed
[00:15:17] fucking house?
[00:15:19] She also said it
[00:15:20] in a way that like
[00:15:21] suggested looking
[00:15:22] in the mirror
[00:15:22] was a bad thing.
[00:15:23] We saw you
[00:15:24] looking in the mirror.
[00:15:26] Yeah.
[00:15:27] We caught you.
[00:15:28] So they know
[00:15:29] what he's doing
[00:15:29] at all points.
[00:15:31] I mean,
[00:15:32] you said something
[00:15:32] about a wizard,
[00:15:33] I think.
[00:15:33] Yeah,
[00:15:33] the house feels
[00:15:34] very much like
[00:15:35] a wizard accidentally
[00:15:36] alived a house
[00:15:37] and left it
[00:15:37] in the corner
[00:15:38] of his estate
[00:15:39] and just walked away.
[00:15:40] Or if you've
[00:15:41] accidentally got
[00:15:42] a huge mimic,
[00:15:43] which I think
[00:15:44] only three people
[00:15:45] in this room
[00:15:45] will understand
[00:15:46] what I mean.
[00:15:46] And I did just
[00:15:47] see them all nodding.
[00:15:49] Yeah.
[00:15:49] Three people.
[00:15:50] Yeah, mimic.
[00:15:51] I don't know.
[00:15:53] What?
[00:15:55] It's a D&D thing.
[00:15:57] Yeah,
[00:15:58] There you go.
[00:15:58] If you're confused,
[00:16:00] congratulations.
[00:16:01] It's that you
[00:16:02] don't know
[00:16:02] what a mimic is.
[00:16:05] Yeah.
[00:16:06] So he works
[00:16:08] in the grounds
[00:16:09] of a haunted house.
[00:16:11] They know
[00:16:12] what he's doing
[00:16:13] at all points.
[00:16:13] They summon him
[00:16:15] once a day
[00:16:15] to read a story.
[00:16:17] So the rest
[00:16:17] of the run time
[00:16:18] is essentially,
[00:16:20] I mean,
[00:16:20] this is something
[00:16:21] that happens
[00:16:21] in a lot
[00:16:22] of kids' TV.
[00:16:24] They will read
[00:16:25] a real published
[00:16:26] picture book
[00:16:27] by a real author.
[00:16:28] And it takes
[00:16:29] up about
[00:16:30] ten minutes
[00:16:31] and that's it.
[00:16:33] It's kind of,
[00:16:34] you know,
[00:16:34] it's not aimed
[00:16:35] at me.
[00:16:35] Dead boring.
[00:16:36] It's boring.
[00:16:36] It's impressive
[00:16:37] that they managed
[00:16:38] to make such
[00:16:39] a boring show.
[00:16:40] So scary.
[00:16:42] It's really boring.
[00:16:43] There needs to be
[00:16:43] something else
[00:16:44] going on here.
[00:16:45] But a framing device.
[00:16:48] Wait for it.
[00:16:50] Horrible.
[00:16:51] So yeah,
[00:16:52] it's like,
[00:16:52] it's kind of good
[00:16:53] because it,
[00:16:53] you know,
[00:16:54] kids will just sit
[00:16:55] and it's quite calming.
[00:16:56] It's quite nice.
[00:16:58] It's like it babysits
[00:16:59] your child for ten minutes.
[00:17:02] But scars them for life.
[00:17:05] Then at the end,
[00:17:07] the clock goes,
[00:17:08] yeah,
[00:17:08] you know what's coming.
[00:17:10] These two are still scarred.
[00:17:12] yeah,
[00:17:13] They've not been able
[00:17:14] to let it go.
[00:17:15] You thought you were
[00:17:16] coming out for a nice day.
[00:17:17] We're reminding you
[00:17:18] the clock.
[00:17:20] Oh my God,
[00:17:21] I'm sorry.
[00:17:23] So,
[00:17:24] the clock at the end
[00:17:25] of the story goes,
[00:17:27] bong,
[00:17:27] time to go,
[00:17:28] time to go.
[00:17:29] It's like,
[00:17:29] what happens if he stays?
[00:17:31] They're like rushing
[00:17:32] him out the door.
[00:17:33] Like,
[00:17:34] okay.
[00:17:34] You have to leave the abyss
[00:17:36] or else you'll become
[00:17:37] one of us.
[00:17:38] Yeah,
[00:17:38] you kind of think,
[00:17:39] is that what's going
[00:17:39] to happen?
[00:17:40] Like,
[00:17:40] they're just going,
[00:17:40] it's going to morph
[00:17:41] into the furniture.
[00:17:42] It's going to become
[00:17:43] something like a chair
[00:17:44] with a face.
[00:17:45] I was scared of
[00:17:46] grandfather clocks
[00:17:46] when I was a kid.
[00:17:48] Me too.
[00:17:48] I remember my mum
[00:17:49] reading me Tom's
[00:17:50] Midnight Garden
[00:17:51] and I remember
[00:17:52] asking her specifically
[00:17:53] to not say
[00:17:54] grandfather clock.
[00:17:55] Do you remember this?
[00:17:57] I was terrified
[00:18:01] of the concept
[00:18:02] of this,
[00:18:03] oh God,
[00:18:03] don't drop that,
[00:18:04] of this big clock
[00:18:06] and I remember
[00:18:06] you reading it to me
[00:18:07] and being like,
[00:18:07] yeah,
[00:18:08] good story,
[00:18:09] stop saying
[00:18:09] grandfather clock,
[00:18:10] please.
[00:18:11] Tom's Midnight Garden
[00:18:12] is gorgeous though,
[00:18:13] it's such a nice story.
[00:18:14] Why do they have to
[00:18:15] ruin it with a
[00:18:16] grandfather clock?
[00:18:17] Well,
[00:18:17] no,
[00:18:17] I agree,
[00:18:18] there is something
[00:18:19] about a grandfather
[00:18:19] clock that feels
[00:18:20] alive.
[00:18:21] Like,
[00:18:22] does it not,
[00:18:23] they all feel like
[00:18:24] they know something
[00:18:25] and they all feel
[00:18:26] slightly haunted,
[00:18:26] like you don't really
[00:18:27] get modern ones.
[00:18:28] If you're in a house
[00:18:29] with a grandfather clock,
[00:18:30] it's like,
[00:18:30] that's seen more
[00:18:31] than you have.
[00:18:32] Yeah.
[00:18:32] And I want to actually
[00:18:34] read,
[00:18:36] she's prepared a reading.
[00:18:38] I have prepared a reading,
[00:18:39] so you all know
[00:18:40] Johnny Cash.
[00:18:41] You know the song
[00:18:42] My Grandfather's Clock?
[00:18:45] My Grandfather's Clock?
[00:18:46] Yeah,
[00:18:46] good.
[00:18:47] So it's a nice song,
[00:18:48] but he knew what
[00:18:50] he was singing about.
[00:18:51] It was bought on the morn
[00:18:53] of the day that he was born
[00:18:54] and was always his
[00:18:55] treasure and pride,
[00:18:56] but it stopped short
[00:18:58] never to go again
[00:18:59] when the old man died.
[00:19:01] Yeah,
[00:19:01] that.
[00:19:02] Yeah.
[00:19:05] Okay,
[00:19:06] I've skipped a few stanzas,
[00:19:07] it goes on.
[00:19:08] It rang and alarmed
[00:19:10] in the dead of the night,
[00:19:12] an alarm that for years
[00:19:13] had been done,
[00:19:15] and we knew that his spirit
[00:19:17] was plumbing for flight,
[00:19:19] that his hour for departure
[00:19:20] had come.
[00:19:22] That's a...
[00:19:23] Have you considered
[00:19:24] a career as a celebrant?
[00:19:27] Yeah,
[00:19:28] maybe.
[00:19:28] Yeah.
[00:19:28] Shall I?
[00:19:29] Yeah.
[00:19:29] Well,
[00:19:29] okay,
[00:19:30] let's finish this section
[00:19:32] on another game
[00:19:33] that is...
[00:19:38] It hasn't got any hands,
[00:19:39] to be fair.
[00:19:40] Yeah,
[00:19:40] what's it going to do?
[00:19:42] Just summon you,
[00:19:43] I guess.
[00:19:43] Summon you,
[00:19:44] yeah.
[00:19:44] And then look at you.
[00:19:45] So this game is very similar
[00:19:47] to the game we played
[00:19:48] up at the top.
[00:19:49] Tell them what it's called.
[00:19:50] It's called,
[00:19:52] if you were in a...
[00:19:55] Have you ever had a dream
[00:19:57] where...
[00:19:58] If you were in a situation,
[00:20:00] like a Beauty and the Beast
[00:20:01] sort of situation
[00:20:02] where you were now
[00:20:04] a household object,
[00:20:05] what would you be?
[00:20:09] Toilet brush.
[00:20:09] It's so funny
[00:20:11] that you'll get
[00:20:11] into my joke
[00:20:12] before me.
[00:20:15] Toilet.
[00:20:17] So,
[00:20:23] the three-way
[00:20:25] kissing sofa,
[00:20:27] which
[00:20:28] belongs in a certain...
[00:20:30] It belongs in a certain
[00:20:31] type of house,
[00:20:32] not ours.
[00:20:32] It's not big enough.
[00:20:33] A Regency home,
[00:20:35] yes.
[00:20:36] I was telling Meg,
[00:20:37] I'm going to say this,
[00:20:39] I'm going to say this,
[00:20:39] but it's not something
[00:20:41] that appears
[00:20:41] in our kind of home.
[00:20:44] I don't think it appears
[00:20:45] in anyone's home.
[00:20:46] Let's role play
[00:20:47] what happened earlier.
[00:20:49] Elsie,
[00:20:49] is it a dishwasher?
[00:20:51] No,
[00:20:51] it's not a dishwasher.
[00:20:52] Oh,
[00:20:52] because to be a dishwasher,
[00:20:54] you'd have to wash your dishes.
[00:20:55] Fuck off.
[00:20:57] I do.
[00:21:01] Do you dry them?
[00:21:04] No,
[00:21:04] I leave it here,
[00:21:05] it dries.
[00:21:06] You've got to dry them.
[00:21:06] Anyway,
[00:21:08] yeah,
[00:21:09] it would be a three-way
[00:21:09] kissing chair.
[00:21:10] It's like a sofa
[00:21:11] that looks like
[00:21:12] the flag of the Isle of Man
[00:21:13] from a...
[00:21:14] Bit freaky?
[00:21:15] It's the freakiest
[00:21:16] of all,
[00:21:16] of all furniture.
[00:21:18] I don't think it is.
[00:21:20] Sexually freaky.
[00:21:22] I don't think it's
[00:21:22] sexually freaky.
[00:21:23] What do you think
[00:21:24] is more sexually freaky?
[00:21:25] A three-way kiss
[00:21:25] is very pedestrian
[00:21:26] compared to,
[00:21:27] you say that,
[00:21:28] but we tried to do one earlier
[00:21:29] and Elsie wouldn't do it.
[00:21:32] This is true.
[00:21:34] Laura said,
[00:21:34] let's do a three-way kiss
[00:21:35] and me and Laura
[00:21:36] both went to do the kiss
[00:21:37] and Elsie like
[00:21:38] aimed at the ceiling
[00:21:40] because she doesn't
[00:21:40] want to kiss us.
[00:21:41] What is a freakier
[00:21:42] household item
[00:21:43] than a three-way
[00:21:43] kissing chair?
[00:21:44] For sexy stuff,
[00:21:45] a cheese grater.
[00:21:50] Horrendously freaky,
[00:21:51] right?
[00:21:52] Horrendously freaky.
[00:21:54] Is that what you'd be?
[00:21:55] Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
[00:21:57] Oh, no.
[00:21:58] Laura, I'll try it.
[00:21:59] No, no, no, no, no, no.
[00:22:00] I know Laura's answer
[00:22:01] to this and it is shit.
[00:22:03] Go on.
[00:22:04] Spoon.
[00:22:06] No, no, no, no.
[00:22:08] Thank you.
[00:22:09] No, no.
[00:22:10] You would like to be...
[00:22:11] It's a household item.
[00:22:12] Show me a house
[00:22:13] without a spoon.
[00:22:13] It's a very non-houses too.
[00:22:15] Show me a house
[00:22:16] without a spoon.
[00:22:16] Non-houses.
[00:22:18] The alternative
[00:22:19] to a house.
[00:22:26] I'm sorry.
[00:22:27] I'm sorry.
[00:22:28] It's a household item.
[00:22:28] So it's a shit answer
[00:22:29] because you want to be
[00:22:31] repeatedly dunked
[00:22:32] into scalding soup
[00:22:33] and then put into
[00:22:34] someone's tepid mouth
[00:22:35] over and over
[00:22:37] and over again.
[00:22:38] It's quite sexually freaky.
[00:22:40] Yeah, more than a sofa.
[00:22:42] Less than a cheese grater.
[00:22:44] Go on.
[00:22:45] I want to be
[00:22:46] where the tasty is.
[00:22:48] Aww.
[00:22:49] I mean,
[00:22:50] I don't know
[00:22:50] how many of you
[00:22:51] will have heard us
[00:22:52] talk about this
[00:22:52] on the podcast
[00:22:53] but we've talked about
[00:22:54] how many times
[00:22:55] I've not been able
[00:22:56] to get to sleep
[00:22:57] because I'm too excited
[00:22:58] for breakfast.
[00:23:01] So cute.
[00:23:02] Go on, Laura.
[00:23:03] I think it's your turn now.
[00:23:04] Yeah, come on then.
[00:23:05] All right.
[00:23:06] So I'm doing the...
[00:23:08] Ooh, big response.
[00:23:10] Yeah, fan favourite.
[00:23:12] Well done.
[00:23:12] I think this might be
[00:23:13] actually yours and mine
[00:23:14] which is the most
[00:23:15] watch is going to be close.
[00:23:16] Okay.
[00:23:17] But I mean,
[00:23:18] Meg's repping mine.
[00:23:20] I thought that we'd be
[00:23:21] wearing outfits
[00:23:22] that were like
[00:23:22] relevant for the show
[00:23:23] and they just look nice.
[00:23:27] Like when we've done
[00:23:28] the filmed episodes
[00:23:29] normally I look normal
[00:23:30] and they look
[00:23:33] fine.
[00:23:35] They look strange.
[00:23:37] It is a wild experience
[00:23:39] going out to like
[00:23:40] a very posh part of London
[00:23:42] where this studio is
[00:23:43] dressed fully
[00:23:44] head to toe
[00:23:45] at eight o'clock
[00:23:45] in the morning
[00:23:46] goth
[00:23:46] and going into a place
[00:23:48] and asking for coffee
[00:23:49] and they were like
[00:23:50] why are you here?
[00:23:52] We're afraid of you.
[00:23:54] Go for it.
[00:23:54] Yeah.
[00:23:54] So the 1998
[00:23:55] direct to video movie
[00:23:58] Scooby Doo
[00:23:58] on Zombie Island.
[00:23:59] Who's seen it?
[00:24:01] Yeah.
[00:24:01] It's everyone.
[00:24:02] You haven't seen it?
[00:24:04] Oh my God, Arthur.
[00:24:06] Get out.
[00:24:08] So the third best one.
[00:24:10] Well, we'll talk about that.
[00:24:12] We'll talk about that in the bar.
[00:24:14] So to run the plot down
[00:24:15] really quickly,
[00:24:16] it's a reunion film
[00:24:17] where so the gang
[00:24:18] have all split up
[00:24:19] and because they got tired
[00:24:21] of all of their mysteries
[00:24:22] being real people
[00:24:23] so they all went
[00:24:24] their separate ways.
[00:24:25] Fred and Daphne
[00:24:26] started a TV show
[00:24:27] on their own
[00:24:28] looking for genuine hauntings.
[00:24:30] Velma went off
[00:24:31] and started either opened
[00:24:33] or just works in a bookshop.
[00:24:35] I feel like she could have
[00:24:36] more ambition
[00:24:36] than just working in a bookshop.
[00:24:37] I think she owns it.
[00:24:38] I think she owns it.
[00:24:39] I hope she owns it.
[00:24:40] It's a mystery novel bookshop.
[00:24:41] Yeah.
[00:24:42] And then what I actually
[00:24:43] really love about this film
[00:24:44] is that a lot of these films
[00:24:46] if Shaggy and Scooby
[00:24:47] go off alone
[00:24:48] they're unemployed.
[00:24:50] In this one
[00:24:51] they're employed
[00:24:51] but right at the top
[00:24:52] of the movie
[00:24:52] they get fired.
[00:24:54] Oh no.
[00:24:55] I totally misaligned
[00:24:57] my slides here.
[00:24:58] Never mind.
[00:25:01] Right at the top
[00:25:02] of the movie
[00:25:02] they get fired
[00:25:03] for eating all of the
[00:25:05] contraband at the airport
[00:25:06] because they've been working
[00:25:07] as sniffer dogs.
[00:25:09] Or the class A's
[00:25:11] as well I assume.
[00:25:12] All this stuff's quarantined
[00:25:14] they would be arrested
[00:25:15] but fine.
[00:25:16] Yeah no
[00:25:17] they let them walk through
[00:25:18] like they just send them home
[00:25:20] full of contraband
[00:25:22] and drugs
[00:25:22] and to be fair
[00:25:24] if you swallow anything
[00:25:25] they'll let you through
[00:25:25] security with it.
[00:25:27] That's a drug mule.
[00:25:28] They're just so
[00:25:29] that's what drug mules do.
[00:25:31] Yeah.
[00:25:31] So this film
[00:25:32] tick
[00:25:33] drug mule joke.
[00:25:37] So the thing
[00:25:38] this film wanted to do
[00:25:39] differently in the production
[00:25:40] is they wanted the monsters
[00:25:41] to be real
[00:25:42] and the way this is
[00:25:43] I think properly
[00:25:44] revealed in the movie
[00:25:45] is Fred
[00:25:46] clean pulls
[00:25:47] a zombie's head off
[00:25:50] after Daphne
[00:25:51] has spent a while
[00:25:53] yanking on
[00:25:54] maybe someone's head.
[00:25:55] It says a lot about her
[00:25:56] because it looks like
[00:25:57] she knows what she's doing.
[00:25:59] Well she's yanked
[00:25:59] a lot of heads off.
[00:26:00] Yeah.
[00:26:01] No she has.
[00:26:02] Not with her fingers
[00:26:03] in their mouth though.
[00:26:05] They're quite elaborate masks
[00:26:07] so she probably has
[00:26:08] had experience
[00:26:09] of having to get
[00:26:09] a finger in there
[00:26:10] but she is yanking on it
[00:26:13] and
[00:26:13] This didn't happen
[00:26:14] in the rehearsals.
[00:26:15] And then
[00:26:18] Mum
[00:26:18] finger in mouth
[00:26:20] laugh
[00:26:20] laugh
[00:26:22] No but what did
[00:26:23] happen in rehearsals
[00:26:24] is Meg said
[00:26:25] well of all the gang
[00:26:25] that you'd want to
[00:26:26] put their fingers
[00:26:26] in your mouth
[00:26:27] laugh
[00:26:29] Not Velma
[00:26:30] Not that you do
[00:26:34] So yeah
[00:26:34] the head comes off
[00:26:35] you'd be scared.
[00:26:37] You alright then?
[00:26:38] Yeah.
[00:26:42] So this was
[00:26:44] there was like
[00:26:45] business stuff
[00:26:45] a merger
[00:26:46] Time Warner
[00:26:47] bought whoever
[00:26:47] and then they were like
[00:26:49] oh let's look at our IP
[00:26:50] this is a very familiar
[00:26:51] tale currently
[00:26:52] let's look at our
[00:26:53] existing IP
[00:26:54] and try and make
[00:26:55] something new
[00:26:56] from the old stuff
[00:26:57] so they made four
[00:26:58] direct to video movies
[00:26:59] starting with
[00:27:00] Zombie Island
[00:27:01] then Witch's Ghost
[00:27:02] then Alien Invaders
[00:27:03] then Cyberchase
[00:27:04] all great.
[00:27:06] Decreasing quality?
[00:27:07] Yeah the
[00:27:08] I don't know why
[00:27:09] the posters
[00:27:09] decrease in quality
[00:27:10] severely
[00:27:11] these are like
[00:27:11] official posters
[00:27:12] but the movies
[00:27:13] all stay
[00:27:14] yeah
[00:27:15] I think
[00:27:15] did we watch
[00:27:17] these at Nan's house?
[00:27:18] Probably
[00:27:19] If you were looking
[00:27:20] for my sibling
[00:27:21] there's a clue
[00:27:22] right
[00:27:23] so the cast
[00:27:24] the only person
[00:27:25] that returned
[00:27:25] from the original
[00:27:26] was
[00:27:30] Deine Katze
[00:27:31] und du
[00:27:31] ihr seid ein starkes Team
[00:27:33] und auch deine Allergie
[00:27:34] ändert daran nichts
[00:27:35] denn wir von Purina
[00:27:37] bringen euch wieder näher zusammen
[00:27:38] mit Purina ProPlan
[00:27:40] LiveClear
[00:27:40] der ersten und einzigen
[00:27:42] Katzennahrung
[00:27:43] die nachweislich
[00:27:44] Allergene reduziert
[00:27:45] hat alles
[00:27:46] was deine Katze braucht
[00:27:47] und neutralisiert
[00:27:48] die Allergene
[00:27:49] auf ihren Haaren
[00:27:50] und Hautschuppen
[00:27:51] schon ab der dritten
[00:27:52] Fütterungswoche
[00:27:53] Purina ProPlan
[00:27:54] LiveClear
[00:27:55] jetzt entdecken
[00:27:56] im Tierbedarf
[00:27:57] und auf
[00:27:57] shop.purina.de
[00:28:00] Who is played by
[00:28:04] Frank Welker
[00:28:06] thank you
[00:28:07] they thought
[00:28:08] he thought
[00:28:08] they were going
[00:28:09] to replace him
[00:28:09] because all the ones
[00:28:10] you've seen
[00:28:11] on Cartoon Network
[00:28:11] or whatever
[00:28:13] CITV maybe
[00:28:15] they've sped them up
[00:28:16] to fit more adverts in
[00:28:17] so he nearly didn't
[00:28:18] get rehired
[00:28:19] because he wasn't
[00:28:20] high pitched enough
[00:28:21] even though it's
[00:28:22] still him talking
[00:28:23] but yeah
[00:28:24] for Shaggy
[00:28:25] they wanted the
[00:28:25] original guy
[00:28:26] to come back
[00:28:26] Casey Kasem
[00:28:27] that's the
[00:28:28] yeah
[00:28:28] but he was like
[00:28:29] no I refuse
[00:28:30] he went strict vegetarian
[00:28:32] and he refused
[00:28:33] to come back
[00:28:33] unless Shaggy
[00:28:34] was never shown
[00:28:35] eating meat again
[00:28:36] but they'd already
[00:28:37] started production
[00:28:38] and they'd already
[00:28:39] done scenes
[00:28:39] where he's eating
[00:28:40] crawfish
[00:28:40] weird tale
[00:28:41] to die on
[00:28:41] isn't it
[00:28:42] I mean
[00:28:42] I get it
[00:28:43] I mean
[00:28:44] I get it
[00:28:44] as a character thing
[00:28:46] I really believe
[00:28:47] Shaggy is a vegetarian
[00:28:48] I get it
[00:28:49] yeah
[00:28:49] like it just
[00:28:50] kind of makes sense
[00:28:51] he looks like a stoner
[00:28:51] well he's
[00:28:52] he's very friendly
[00:28:54] yeah
[00:28:55] yeah
[00:28:55] all vegetarian
[00:28:56] really friendly
[00:28:57] yeah
[00:28:57] yeah
[00:29:00] so he's played
[00:29:01] by Billy West instead
[00:29:02] the original for Shaggy
[00:29:04] Don Messick
[00:29:05] had retired in 1996
[00:29:07] and then he died
[00:29:08] in 1997
[00:29:08] so the movie's
[00:29:09] actually dedicated
[00:29:10] to him
[00:29:10] he was replaced
[00:29:11] by Scott
[00:29:14] Scott Inez
[00:29:15] and then
[00:29:16] so Daphne's
[00:29:17] was originally
[00:29:18] supposed to be
[00:29:18] Heather North
[00:29:18] and then it was
[00:29:20] actually Mary Kay
[00:29:21] Bergman
[00:29:21] yeah
[00:29:21] you're really on it
[00:29:23] and then
[00:29:24] Velma was
[00:29:25] BJ Ward
[00:29:26] because she'd
[00:29:27] played her
[00:29:27] most recently
[00:29:28] in a Johnny Bravo
[00:29:29] crossover
[00:29:31] yeah
[00:29:31] and then
[00:29:32] I talked about
[00:29:32] this already
[00:29:33] oh this moment
[00:29:36] this still
[00:29:37] it's always funny
[00:29:39] no
[00:29:40] it's not
[00:29:42] Richard Ayoade
[00:29:43] does it in an ad
[00:29:44] and I
[00:29:44] or one of the banks
[00:29:45] yeah I just hate him
[00:29:46] just yeah
[00:29:47] we get it
[00:29:47] you look boring
[00:29:48] it's only funny
[00:29:50] when cartoons do it
[00:29:51] like when a cartoon
[00:29:52] opens their wardrobe
[00:29:53] and they've got
[00:29:53] their outfit repeated
[00:29:55] like copied
[00:29:56] and pasted
[00:29:56] it's always funny
[00:29:57] but Richard Ayoade
[00:29:58] doesn't
[00:29:58] I don't know
[00:29:59] he's not a cartoon
[00:30:00] can't pull it off
[00:30:00] yeah maybe that's it
[00:30:01] maybe that's it
[00:30:02] I just like
[00:30:03] inner lives
[00:30:03] of cartoon characters
[00:30:05] it's nice and simple
[00:30:07] right
[00:30:07] so I'm going to
[00:30:08] show you a clip
[00:30:08] from like
[00:30:09] how in my head
[00:30:10] I remember this film
[00:30:12] it's like the main
[00:30:13] zombie moment
[00:30:14] yeah
[00:30:58] chilling
[00:30:58] so this came out in 1998
[00:31:00] I was born in 1998
[00:31:01] I have no idea
[00:31:01] how old I was
[00:31:02] when I watched it
[00:31:03] terrifying to a child
[00:31:04] but that's how
[00:31:05] I remember it
[00:31:06] that's what I thought of
[00:31:07] when Elsie was like
[00:31:08] oh let's do this
[00:31:09] and then we watched
[00:31:10] the film
[00:31:11] and this is how
[00:31:12] it actually plays out
[00:31:23] completely fine
[00:31:38] like that's not
[00:31:40] as an adult
[00:31:40] you're like
[00:31:41] oh that's totally fine
[00:31:42] but that's
[00:31:42] in my head
[00:31:43] it was the
[00:31:43] very terrifying
[00:31:45] music I stole
[00:31:46] from Outlast
[00:31:47] well clearly
[00:31:47] they did a good
[00:31:48] enough job
[00:31:48] that you remembered
[00:31:49] it scarily
[00:31:50] I mean every
[00:31:51] version of Scooby-Doo
[00:31:52] ever
[00:31:53] has got really
[00:31:54] good like
[00:31:55] pop punk
[00:31:56] music in it
[00:31:56] like that's
[00:31:57] their chosen
[00:31:58] why is that
[00:31:58] their house style
[00:31:59] I like it though
[00:32:00] I was looking for
[00:32:01] other alternative
[00:32:02] Scooby-Doo chase music
[00:32:03] to see if they had
[00:32:04] any creepy chase music
[00:32:05] anywhere
[00:32:06] every single chase scene
[00:32:08] is a little music video
[00:32:09] for either like
[00:32:09] pop punk
[00:32:10] or disco
[00:32:11] none of it's
[00:32:12] scary whatsoever
[00:32:13] it is for kids
[00:32:14] yeah I think that works
[00:32:15] in its favour
[00:32:16] because Scooby-Doo
[00:32:17] the whole thing is
[00:32:18] nothing's
[00:32:18] monsters aren't real
[00:32:20] everything's solvable
[00:32:21] everything's fine
[00:32:22] so it makes sense
[00:32:22] the best song
[00:32:23] I mean are we gonna
[00:32:24] sing it?
[00:32:25] I think we should
[00:32:25] what's new Scooby-Doo
[00:32:27] we're coming after you
[00:32:29] we're gonna solve
[00:32:30] that mystery
[00:32:31] I see Scooby-Doo
[00:32:33] the trail is back to you
[00:32:35] what's new Scooby-Doo
[00:32:37] thank you everyone
[00:32:38] I feel bad because
[00:32:40] I did just ditch you
[00:32:41] I know you did
[00:32:41] yeah I'm sorry
[00:32:42] I knew you would
[00:32:43] that's the thing
[00:32:44] so like
[00:32:45] I didn't even ditch you
[00:32:46] I always ditch on the singing
[00:32:48] but this time I didn't
[00:32:49] oh
[00:32:49] that's alright
[00:32:50] I knew I was going it alone
[00:32:51] but I
[00:32:52] you know
[00:32:52] I love you
[00:32:54] I literally sang with you
[00:32:56] did you?
[00:32:57] I'm not talking to you
[00:32:57] I'm talking to her
[00:32:58] anyway
[00:33:00] so I want to tell a story
[00:33:02] about that song
[00:33:02] if I may
[00:33:04] yeah thanks
[00:33:05] my friend Jazz
[00:33:06] Jazz
[00:33:07] friend of the pod
[00:33:08] you might have heard her
[00:33:09] on a couple of episodes
[00:33:10] she got a tiny round of applause
[00:33:12] just there
[00:33:12] thanks
[00:33:15] that's nice
[00:33:16] yeah
[00:33:16] so when we were in secondary school together
[00:33:20] she had
[00:33:21] what's new Scooby-Doo
[00:33:22] as her ringtone
[00:33:23] and she left
[00:33:25] her phone on like
[00:33:26] full volume notifications
[00:33:29] for
[00:33:29] I don't know
[00:33:30] about three years
[00:33:31] in the hope
[00:33:32] that someone would call her
[00:33:34] and her whole class
[00:33:36] would think she was cool
[00:33:37] slash funny
[00:33:38] and in all that time
[00:33:39] she actually never got a call
[00:33:43] so while we're talking about ringtones
[00:33:45] I just want to say
[00:33:47] my phone's been
[00:33:48] on silent
[00:33:49] for what
[00:33:50] like 15 years
[00:33:51] yeah
[00:33:51] yeah
[00:33:52] your reaction
[00:33:53] to a loud phone
[00:33:54] is exactly
[00:33:55] the reaction
[00:33:55] we all have
[00:33:56] to a loud phone
[00:33:57] it's not made
[00:33:58] it's not made a sound
[00:33:58] in years
[00:33:59] I mean
[00:33:59] if you
[00:34:01] have audible
[00:34:03] ringtones
[00:34:03] notifications
[00:34:04] whatever
[00:34:05] I'm trying to be mean
[00:34:07] but
[00:34:08] no
[00:34:08] it is mean
[00:34:09] but I'm going to say it
[00:34:10] it means you're old
[00:34:10] like
[00:34:11] yeah
[00:34:11] old people have audible ringtones
[00:34:13] I got told off
[00:34:14] at the doctors the other day
[00:34:15] they've been trying to ring me
[00:34:16] to book an appointment
[00:34:17] and when I finally rang back
[00:34:19] she said
[00:34:21] why does your phone
[00:34:22] always go to
[00:34:23] voicemail
[00:34:24] and I was like
[00:34:25] maybe
[00:34:25] it's because you're ringing me
[00:34:26] at one o'clock
[00:34:27] on a Wednesday
[00:34:28] when I'm at work
[00:34:30] but that's not why
[00:34:31] that's not the truth
[00:34:31] and she went
[00:34:33] no it's not
[00:34:35] and she said
[00:34:36] oh sorry
[00:34:37] it's just because
[00:34:37] I didn't want you
[00:34:38] to miss the call
[00:34:38] from the doctor
[00:34:39] I was like
[00:34:40] okay that's fine
[00:34:42] and the next day
[00:34:44] I made a point
[00:34:44] of taking my phone
[00:34:46] off of do not disturb
[00:34:47] so I got this call
[00:34:48] wait in
[00:34:49] wait in
[00:34:49] wait in
[00:34:50] I look on my phone
[00:34:51] I realise
[00:34:51] that instead of
[00:34:52] taking it off
[00:34:53] do not disturb
[00:34:53] I've taken it off
[00:34:54] auto rotate
[00:34:55] so I have indeed
[00:34:59] missed the call
[00:35:00] I was warned
[00:35:01] that this might happen
[00:35:03] at least you got
[00:35:04] to watch YouTube
[00:35:04] in bed
[00:35:05] in the correct
[00:35:05] yeah
[00:35:09] yeah
[00:35:11] yeah
[00:35:11] yeah
[00:35:11] if you're out
[00:35:13] in public
[00:35:13] and you hear
[00:35:14] like the classic
[00:35:14] iPhone
[00:35:15] like
[00:35:16] then like
[00:35:17] oh an old person
[00:35:18] is getting a call
[00:35:19] my boyfriend's ringtone
[00:35:21] used to be the
[00:35:23] what was it
[00:35:24] who wants to be a millionaire
[00:35:26] theme tune
[00:35:27] at one time
[00:35:28] we were having a nap
[00:35:29] and his mum rang him
[00:35:31] duh duh duh
[00:35:33] I hate this story
[00:35:35] because isn't it like
[00:35:36] wasn't it like
[00:35:37] a wake up in the dark
[00:35:38] you go to sleep
[00:35:39] in the night
[00:35:40] you wake up in the dark
[00:35:41] that absolute worst thing
[00:35:42] to wake you up
[00:35:43] it's awful
[00:35:45] anyway
[00:35:45] oh where am I
[00:35:47] horrible
[00:35:48] but yeah
[00:35:49] what about like
[00:35:50] where am I
[00:35:50] and why
[00:35:51] by being asked
[00:35:51] questions
[00:35:52] where I'll win money
[00:35:53] his other ringtone
[00:35:55] is bye bye bye
[00:35:56] by NSYNC
[00:35:57] nice
[00:35:57] nice
[00:35:59] well Laura used to have
[00:36:00] not a
[00:36:01] not a ringtone
[00:36:03] it was
[00:36:03] a text
[00:36:05] notification
[00:36:06] it's an access
[00:36:07] it's an
[00:36:07] accessibility feature
[00:36:09] not for me
[00:36:11] okay but you're not deaf
[00:36:12] yeah
[00:36:12] so it was
[00:36:13] so whenever she got a text
[00:36:15] it was like
[00:36:16] three
[00:36:17] really
[00:36:18] really
[00:36:19] bright
[00:36:20] flashes
[00:36:21] so we would all be like
[00:36:22] watching a film or something
[00:36:23] and like suddenly I was having a stroke
[00:36:25] like every
[00:36:26] a year
[00:36:27] we were like
[00:36:27] stop it
[00:36:28] we don't like it
[00:36:30] and she did eventually
[00:36:31] take that off
[00:36:32] I always had to turn it off for the cinema
[00:36:33] because it would still
[00:36:34] keep going
[00:36:35] even if you had your phone on mute
[00:36:36] and it was the most annoying thing
[00:36:37] and then just one
[00:36:38] one day I just never put it back on
[00:36:40] why did you have it in the first place
[00:36:41] you've not given a single reason
[00:36:43] why it was good
[00:36:44] it was like a trend
[00:36:45] amongst my friends at school
[00:36:46] oh
[00:36:47] you did it to be cool
[00:36:48] just like Jasmine
[00:36:49] just like Jasmine
[00:36:51] never got a call
[00:36:52] at least Jasmine was like trailblazing
[00:36:54] I was literally following a crowd
[00:36:56] yeah
[00:36:57] so that's Scooby Doo
[00:36:59] head comes off
[00:37:00] and it's scary
[00:37:00] Meg
[00:37:01] hi
[00:37:02] who remembers
[00:37:05] these guys
[00:37:06] hands up
[00:37:10] you win
[00:37:11] thank you
[00:37:12] thank you
[00:37:13] so
[00:37:13] before I say anything else
[00:37:15] let's tag ourselves
[00:37:18] it's great that you all
[00:37:19] listen to the podcast
[00:37:20] I'm obviously Poe
[00:37:22] right
[00:37:22] because it all Poe says
[00:37:24] is
[00:37:24] his name
[00:37:25] the red one
[00:37:25] the red one
[00:37:26] and I will find any reason
[00:37:27] to say my name
[00:37:28] so
[00:37:29] I'm the biggest narcissist
[00:37:31] so is Poe
[00:37:32] I think I'm Poe
[00:37:32] and you love safety
[00:37:34] I do
[00:37:35] people
[00:37:35] people in London
[00:37:36] not wearing helmets
[00:37:37] with their bikes
[00:37:38] cunts
[00:37:41] deserve to die
[00:37:43] well that was
[00:37:44] big claim
[00:37:48] yeah
[00:37:48] that's the boldest claim
[00:37:49] you've made
[00:37:50] talking about this
[00:37:51] you've never done that
[00:37:51] in rehearsal
[00:37:52] it really winds me up
[00:37:53] anyway
[00:37:53] yeah
[00:37:54] she'll tell you off
[00:37:55] even if she doesn't know you
[00:37:56] like where's your helmet
[00:37:57] give them push
[00:37:58] yeah
[00:37:59] give them a little
[00:38:00] yeah
[00:38:00] so
[00:38:01] teach them a lesson
[00:38:03] yeah
[00:38:03] what about you
[00:38:04] Lala
[00:38:05] what because
[00:38:06] she doesn't really know
[00:38:07] what's going on
[00:38:08] yeah
[00:38:08] didn't want to say it
[00:38:10] what about you
[00:38:10] we can decide between
[00:38:13] green and purple
[00:38:14] I don't know their names
[00:38:15] right cool
[00:38:15] Dicky Winky or Dixie
[00:38:17] yeah
[00:38:18] okay the two that's left
[00:38:20] right
[00:38:20] Dixie's green
[00:38:21] Dicky Winky's powerful
[00:38:22] yeah
[00:38:23] okay
[00:38:23] because I do both of those things
[00:38:25] depending on the day
[00:38:27] cool
[00:38:27] what do you mean
[00:38:28] wear a hat
[00:38:29] and carry a bag
[00:38:32] so do I
[00:38:33] be like
[00:38:34] funky
[00:38:35] or be prim
[00:38:35] if
[00:38:36] if you were a Teletubby
[00:38:38] what would your
[00:38:39] tummy broadcast
[00:38:41] oh
[00:38:44] are you standards
[00:38:45] good
[00:38:45] any others
[00:38:46] any others
[00:38:47] actually let's do them
[00:38:48] after because Vic might
[00:38:49] get my joke again
[00:38:49] oh yeah
[00:38:51] you go first
[00:38:52] no you go first
[00:38:53] okay
[00:38:53] me a cat man
[00:38:54] it's cute
[00:38:55] it's cute isn't it
[00:38:56] it's cute
[00:38:56] that's nice
[00:38:57] that's nice
[00:38:58] what about you
[00:38:58] like
[00:39:00] channel 5
[00:39:02] at like 2am
[00:39:03] kind of
[00:39:04] you know like the
[00:39:05] weirdest documentaries
[00:39:07] you've ever seen
[00:39:08] just yeah those
[00:39:09] shocking moments
[00:39:10] of 1989
[00:39:10] yeah
[00:39:12] embarrassing bodies
[00:39:13] yeah
[00:39:16] it's just so true
[00:39:17] yeah
[00:39:18] my strange addiction
[00:39:19] yeah
[00:39:19] yeah
[00:39:20] yeah
[00:39:20] yeah
[00:39:20] um
[00:39:21] the paperclip lady
[00:39:23] yeah
[00:39:24] babe station
[00:39:25] thank you
[00:39:27] bet you weren't
[00:39:28] going to say that
[00:39:28] thank you
[00:39:29] yeah
[00:39:29] yeah
[00:39:29] laugh
[00:39:30] yeah
[00:39:30] just because
[00:39:31] if you don't know
[00:39:32] Laura called
[00:39:33] babe station
[00:39:33] when she was a kid
[00:39:35] if you don't know
[00:39:37] we all know now
[00:39:41] possibly
[00:39:42] so
[00:39:43] yeah
[00:39:44] yeah
[00:39:44] didn't call them
[00:39:45] yourself
[00:39:45] our dad
[00:39:49] didn't know about this
[00:39:50] so when I told them this
[00:39:51] my dad
[00:39:51] our dad
[00:39:52] was in the house
[00:39:53] at the time
[00:39:53] and I went in
[00:39:53] and I was like
[00:39:54] hey
[00:39:54] do you remember
[00:39:55] me calling
[00:39:56] wave station
[00:39:56] I swear you got
[00:39:57] into trouble for it
[00:39:58] and he was like
[00:39:59] what are you talking about
[00:40:00] so I got away
[00:40:01] with it clean
[00:40:03] so
[00:40:03] so you would do that
[00:40:04] just to mock me
[00:40:05] permanently
[00:40:06] yes
[00:40:07] right
[00:40:08] and you know
[00:40:09] it's a nice thing
[00:40:10] to have on your tummy
[00:40:10] anyone want to chime in
[00:40:12] with good telly programs
[00:40:15] oh
[00:40:18] oh my god
[00:40:19] earlier me and Meg
[00:40:20] were talking about
[00:40:20] how you know like
[00:40:21] so people who are
[00:40:22] really skilled
[00:40:22] it tends to make
[00:40:23] them more attractive
[00:40:23] right
[00:40:24] what
[00:40:26] we didn't say this
[00:40:27] directly about you
[00:40:28] Sean
[00:40:28] no
[00:40:28] we didn't talk about
[00:40:33] like cooking
[00:40:33] cooking makes you
[00:40:34] being good at cooking
[00:40:35] makes you hot
[00:40:35] right
[00:40:36] what are some skills
[00:40:37] that would not be hot
[00:40:39] and one of them
[00:40:39] was like murder
[00:40:40] and then
[00:40:41] I took a minute
[00:40:42] it was like
[00:40:44] cryptocurrency
[00:40:45] yeah
[00:40:45] the better you are
[00:40:46] at crypto
[00:40:48] the uglier
[00:40:49] yeah
[00:40:50] knowing about
[00:40:50] stocks
[00:40:51] yeah
[00:40:52] knowing things
[00:40:53] knowing things
[00:40:54] so I guess it offsets
[00:40:57] that side of it
[00:40:58] so we all know
[00:40:59] who these guys are
[00:41:00] don't we
[00:41:00] little pricks
[00:41:01] I feel like society
[00:41:03] can be split
[00:41:04] into two factions
[00:41:05] and that's just
[00:41:06] people that take this
[00:41:07] at face value
[00:41:08] and people who
[00:41:09] are scarred by it
[00:41:11] who people
[00:41:11] you know
[00:41:12] it's
[00:41:12] and it's not even them
[00:41:14] I want to talk about
[00:41:14] it's not even them
[00:41:15] I want to talk about
[00:41:16] they're not my problem
[00:41:16] they're not the problem
[00:41:18] so
[00:41:19] just before we
[00:41:20] just go to the next slide
[00:41:21] for me
[00:41:22] this is what scared me
[00:41:23] as a kid
[00:41:24] I hated it
[00:41:25] and like
[00:41:25] if you actually look closely
[00:41:27] the whole face is yellow
[00:41:28] except the eyes
[00:41:30] why are they blue
[00:41:33] it is like the house
[00:41:35] it is like the house
[00:41:35] isn't it
[00:41:36] faces where they shouldn't be
[00:41:37] faces where they shouldn't be
[00:41:39] Laura said about
[00:41:39] this and the house
[00:41:40] is that you can't see
[00:41:41] the whites of their eyes
[00:41:43] very much
[00:41:43] which is a feature
[00:41:45] of predators
[00:41:48] front facing
[00:41:49] no white
[00:41:50] they're both
[00:41:51] coming for you
[00:41:52] rat is rat is
[00:41:53] the baby in the sun
[00:41:54] and the house
[00:41:55] from step inside
[00:41:56] predators
[00:41:56] so an episode
[00:41:58] of the teletub
[00:41:59] has got banned
[00:42:00] believe it or not
[00:42:01] I'm sure you believe it
[00:42:02] you guys know
[00:42:04] so the sketch
[00:42:05] that caused
[00:42:06] the controversy
[00:42:07] was featured
[00:42:08] in an episode
[00:42:08] called Cecil
[00:42:09] from 1997
[00:42:11] I've written down
[00:42:12] involving two
[00:42:13] wooden characters
[00:42:14] that move
[00:42:14] fixed to wheels
[00:42:16] called the bear
[00:42:17] the brown fuzzy hair
[00:42:18] and the scary lion
[00:42:20] with the big scary teeth
[00:42:21] which I feel like
[00:42:22] is where they went wrong
[00:42:23] like if you start
[00:42:23] telling kids
[00:42:24] that things are scary
[00:42:25] they are
[00:42:25] they're going to expect
[00:42:26] to be scared
[00:42:27] right aren't they
[00:42:28] so
[00:42:28] and you know
[00:42:30] throughout this whole segment
[00:42:31] it cuts back to the
[00:42:32] teletub is going
[00:42:33] uh oh
[00:42:35] like
[00:42:36] they only ever
[00:42:37] you're supposed to be
[00:42:38] scared
[00:42:38] under vibes
[00:42:39] we're telling you
[00:42:40] what to think
[00:42:41] and this is bad
[00:42:42] so I
[00:42:43] for the purposes of time
[00:42:44] I have edited this down
[00:42:46] but like let's just
[00:42:47] take a look
[00:42:47] and see what we think
[00:42:48] okay
[00:42:48] okay
[00:43:02] it's the bear
[00:43:25] and I'm coming
[00:43:26] with brown fuzzy hair
[00:43:42] I'll go right over here
[00:43:44] and I'll go right over there
[00:43:53] fuzzy hair
[00:43:55] I'll hide over here
[00:43:57] fuzzy hair
[00:44:09] I'm hiding from a lion
[00:44:12] but he doesn't know
[00:44:15] in the brief show
[00:45:06] they bring that out
[00:45:08] as a sketch
[00:45:08] and you're like
[00:45:09] oh no
[00:45:10] I'm not safe anymore
[00:45:11] I do feel like
[00:45:12] I saw that as a kid
[00:45:14] and I fucking loved it
[00:45:16] to be scared
[00:45:20] you know to think
[00:45:21] that aired in 97
[00:45:22] and it was taken off air
[00:45:24] and they had to re-edit it
[00:45:26] with less scary music
[00:45:27] and stuff
[00:45:28] we weren't born
[00:45:29] for two more years
[00:45:30] so we haven't
[00:45:31] so we're
[00:45:32] we're 98
[00:45:33] alright Jesus
[00:45:35] we're the to brag about
[00:45:36] old
[00:45:36] to correct yourself
[00:45:39] or anything else
[00:45:41] so we won't have
[00:45:42] actually seen that
[00:45:43] broadcast
[00:45:44] not at the time
[00:45:45] as it was
[00:45:46] no
[00:45:46] I do feel like
[00:45:48] if the lion wasn't voiced
[00:45:49] like a wheeler dealer
[00:45:51] it might be
[00:45:52] a bit scarier
[00:45:54] yeah
[00:45:55] but I do think
[00:45:56] it's important
[00:45:57] that we do draw
[00:45:58] the one obvious comparison
[00:46:00] okay the next one
[00:46:05] right
[00:46:05] so
[00:46:06] you know
[00:46:07] those posts
[00:46:08] you get on Facebook
[00:46:09] that are like
[00:46:10] two twins
[00:46:12] but one of them
[00:46:13] did like
[00:46:13] loads of cocaine
[00:46:15] and smoke
[00:46:15] and like sunbeds
[00:46:17] and the other one
[00:46:17] was cryogenically
[00:46:18] frozen as an infant
[00:46:19] right
[00:46:19] they look like
[00:46:21] twins
[00:46:21] that went down
[00:46:22] very different
[00:46:23] walks of life
[00:46:24] although actually
[00:46:25] the picture I've
[00:46:25] selected there
[00:46:26] of Freddie Fosbert
[00:46:28] he looks like a
[00:46:28] stand-up comedian
[00:46:29] he does
[00:46:31] if you don't know
[00:46:33] this is from
[00:46:33] Five Nights at Freddy's
[00:46:34] which was
[00:46:35] I think first released
[00:46:37] in 2010
[00:46:37] so 13 years after
[00:46:39] that could be
[00:46:40] the same bear
[00:46:42] have you seen them
[00:46:43] in the same room
[00:46:44] together
[00:46:44] no
[00:46:45] do you want to
[00:46:46] they're here tonight
[00:46:50] so yeah
[00:46:51] they did have to
[00:46:51] edit that clip
[00:46:53] because it received
[00:46:54] so many complaints
[00:46:54] that it was
[00:46:55] scaring kids
[00:46:55] so that is the
[00:46:56] original
[00:46:57] as far as I'm aware
[00:46:58] I couldn't find
[00:47:00] the edited version
[00:47:02] because nobody's
[00:47:03] interested in the
[00:47:04] edited version
[00:47:04] they just want to
[00:47:05] see that one
[00:47:07] no
[00:47:08] well
[00:47:09] nope
[00:47:10] that's the end
[00:47:11] of the presentation
[00:47:11] anyway
[00:47:12] so
[00:47:12] it's very easy
[00:47:13] to see
[00:47:14] if you heard
[00:47:14] at the beginning
[00:47:15] of that clip
[00:47:15] as well
[00:47:15] they started filming
[00:47:16] on a really sunny day
[00:47:17] like blue sky
[00:47:19] no clouds
[00:47:20] I'm the bear
[00:47:23] clouds over
[00:47:24] like oh
[00:47:24] welcome to evil
[00:47:26] like
[00:47:27] it's horrible
[00:47:28] it's horrible
[00:47:29] to look at
[00:47:29] I just hate
[00:47:30] how they move
[00:47:30] because like
[00:47:31] you know a human's
[00:47:32] operating it
[00:47:32] but it's been edited
[00:47:33] to go faster
[00:47:34] so it's like
[00:47:34] just off
[00:47:35] in a way
[00:47:36] that makes you
[00:47:36] really uncomfortable
[00:47:37] yeah
[00:47:37] it's like
[00:47:38] the Teletubbies
[00:47:39] are moving
[00:47:39] like humans
[00:47:40] because obviously
[00:47:40] there's humans
[00:47:41] in there
[00:47:41] and it's
[00:47:43] you know
[00:47:43] it's gentle
[00:47:44] everything's like
[00:47:45] round and fuzzy
[00:47:46] and you're
[00:47:48] sat there
[00:47:48] as a three year old
[00:47:49] and you know
[00:47:50] where you are
[00:47:50] and it's your safe space
[00:47:51] and then
[00:47:52] you're told
[00:47:54] that something bad
[00:47:54] is going to happen
[00:47:55] there's this
[00:47:56] rolling drum roll
[00:47:57] and then an
[00:47:58] unfamiliar shape
[00:47:59] starts moving
[00:48:00] erratically
[00:48:01] across the screen
[00:48:02] and like leaving
[00:48:03] the screen
[00:48:03] and then coming back
[00:48:04] it's like
[00:48:04] could they not
[00:48:06] really have
[00:48:07] predicted
[00:48:07] that that would
[00:48:09] really scare
[00:48:10] some people
[00:48:11] that's what I don't
[00:48:11] understand
[00:48:12] and this
[00:48:12] it was filmed
[00:48:14] and edited
[00:48:15] and produced
[00:48:15] and given
[00:48:18] the go ahead
[00:48:19] by grown ups
[00:48:20] and it was made
[00:48:21] by our favourite
[00:48:23] person
[00:48:23] Andrew Davenport
[00:48:25] who created
[00:48:26] Tots TV
[00:48:27] and Teletubbies
[00:48:29] and In the Night
[00:48:29] Garden
[00:48:29] so he
[00:48:31] specifically
[00:48:32] somehow
[00:48:33] knows
[00:48:34] how to
[00:48:35] get
[00:48:36] children
[00:48:37] to sit down
[00:48:38] and just be
[00:48:38] mesmerised
[00:48:39] like kids
[00:48:40] love these shows
[00:48:41] he just can get
[00:48:42] in their heads
[00:48:43] he's very very
[00:48:43] good at it
[00:48:44] and has been
[00:48:45] celebrated for that
[00:48:46] we think he maybe
[00:48:47] wasn't there on set
[00:48:48] that day
[00:48:48] I just think he
[00:48:50] like I do believe
[00:48:51] this
[00:48:51] he wouldn't have
[00:48:52] allowed it
[00:48:53] I do think that
[00:48:54] the show
[00:48:55] in itself
[00:48:56] is a bit
[00:48:57] unnervingly
[00:48:58] liminal though
[00:48:58] isn't it
[00:48:59] yeah
[00:48:59] especially that bit
[00:49:00] where it's like
[00:49:01] rumbling
[00:49:02] and all the
[00:49:03] lines coming
[00:49:04] it's like
[00:49:05] nothing's here
[00:49:06] they're weird
[00:49:07] like
[00:49:09] very like
[00:49:09] very very
[00:49:10] post-apocalyptic
[00:49:11] shire
[00:49:12] location
[00:49:13] it is
[00:49:14] it's like
[00:49:14] the shire
[00:49:15] on
[00:49:17] but not
[00:49:18] nice in
[00:49:19] any way
[00:49:19] it's like
[00:49:20] neon greens
[00:49:21] fake flowers
[00:49:21] psychedelic
[00:49:22] lord of the
[00:49:23] rings
[00:49:23] yeah
[00:49:24] horrible
[00:49:25] and also
[00:49:26] the names
[00:49:27] for both
[00:49:27] of them
[00:49:27] are lies
[00:49:29] the bear
[00:49:30] with the brown
[00:49:30] fuzzy hair
[00:49:31] no
[00:49:32] the bear
[00:49:33] with skin
[00:49:35] maybe
[00:49:35] and the
[00:49:36] light
[00:49:37] the
[00:49:37] big
[00:49:38] scary
[00:49:39] lion
[00:49:39] with the
[00:49:39] big
[00:49:40] scary
[00:49:40] teeth
[00:49:40] little
[00:49:41] with teeth
[00:49:42] yeah
[00:49:43] so
[00:49:44] I mean
[00:49:45] they're still
[00:49:46] scary though
[00:49:47] aren't they
[00:49:47] like
[00:49:47] their eyes
[00:49:48] move
[00:49:48] like
[00:49:48] yes
[00:49:49] they're
[00:49:50] quite sunken
[00:49:50] and again
[00:49:52] literally
[00:49:53] the same
[00:49:53] eyes
[00:49:54] and then
[00:49:57] wow
[00:49:59] caked up
[00:50:01] that bear
[00:50:01] is caked up
[00:50:05] don't
[00:50:06] drag
[00:50:06] yeah
[00:50:07] yeah
[00:50:07] yeah
[00:50:07] yeah
[00:50:10] snatched
[00:50:11] I'm sick
[00:50:12] of these
[00:50:13] unrealistic
[00:50:16] expectations
[00:50:17] for women
[00:50:19] but like
[00:50:20] the voice
[00:50:20] actors
[00:50:21] like
[00:50:21] oh my god
[00:50:22] they
[00:50:22] you can hear
[00:50:23] them trying
[00:50:24] their best
[00:50:24] with what
[00:50:24] they've been
[00:50:25] given
[00:50:25] they were
[00:50:25] severely
[00:50:26] misdirected
[00:50:27] yeah
[00:50:27] I mean
[00:50:28] I don't even
[00:50:28] think that
[00:50:28] they knew
[00:50:29] what they
[00:50:29] were trying
[00:50:30] to do
[00:50:30] like
[00:50:30] bless
[00:50:31] them
[00:50:31] yeah
[00:50:32] and then
[00:50:32] they tried
[00:50:33] to make
[00:50:33] it a bit
[00:50:33] less scary
[00:50:34] when the
[00:50:35] the bear
[00:50:36] I took it
[00:50:36] out
[00:50:37] I'm sorry
[00:50:37] the bear
[00:50:38] the bear
[00:50:38] goes
[00:50:39] I have a
[00:50:39] joke
[00:50:40] to tell
[00:50:40] yeah
[00:50:48] it's not
[00:50:52] nice
[00:50:53] it's not
[00:50:53] nice
[00:50:53] so what
[00:50:56] do we
[00:50:56] think
[00:50:56] yeah
[00:50:57] don't
[00:50:58] don't
[00:50:58] like it
[00:50:58] yeah
[00:50:58] what
[00:50:59] my
[00:51:00] section
[00:51:00] is that
[00:51:01] I
[00:51:01] didn't
[00:51:01] realise
[00:51:01] until this
[00:51:02] morning
[00:51:02] that
[00:51:02] they
[00:51:03] brought
[00:51:03] genuine
[00:51:03] facts
[00:51:04] all I've
[00:51:04] told you
[00:51:05] is
[00:51:05] 1997
[00:51:06] that's all
[00:51:06] yeah
[00:51:07] well we
[00:51:08] sorry
[00:51:09] we
[00:51:10] have seen
[00:51:11] some of the
[00:51:11] other shows
[00:51:12] in this
[00:51:13] festival
[00:51:13] and they
[00:51:14] were like
[00:51:14] coming on
[00:51:15] kind of
[00:51:16] unprepared with
[00:51:17] their facts
[00:51:17] and like
[00:51:17] making a joke
[00:51:18] about it
[00:51:19] and the audience
[00:51:19] was loving
[00:51:20] that they
[00:51:20] didn't really
[00:51:21] know what
[00:51:21] they were
[00:51:21] talking about
[00:51:22] they were
[00:51:22] googling
[00:51:22] things
[00:51:22] and I
[00:51:23] thought oh
[00:51:23] maybe we
[00:51:24] could do
[00:51:25] that
[00:51:25] but I
[00:51:25] can't
[00:51:26] I have to
[00:51:29] tell facts
[00:51:30] you wanted to
[00:51:31] say something
[00:51:31] yeah and also
[00:51:32] there's one bit
[00:51:34] after the lion
[00:51:35] shows up
[00:51:35] when he said
[00:51:36] about I'm the
[00:51:36] scary girl
[00:51:37] I'm the
[00:51:37] bit scary
[00:51:37] teeth
[00:51:38] one thing I
[00:51:38] found funny
[00:51:39] you heard
[00:51:40] Tinky
[00:51:40] Winky
[00:51:40] scream out
[00:51:41] loud
[00:51:42] yeah you
[00:51:44] do
[00:51:45] you heard
[00:51:45] him
[00:51:45] he goes
[00:51:48] ah
[00:51:52] really they
[00:51:53] set it up
[00:51:54] for failure
[00:51:54] didn't they
[00:51:56] so
[00:51:57] oh
[00:51:57] question
[00:51:58] hello
[00:51:59] the
[00:52:00] tell
[00:52:00] the
[00:52:00] tally
[00:52:00] tally
[00:52:00] saw
[00:52:01] the
[00:52:01] stand
[00:52:02] in
[00:52:02] coming in
[00:52:02] from a mile
[00:52:04] away
[00:52:04] because
[00:52:06] it's only a surprise
[00:52:08] to the camera
[00:52:11] coming over the horizon
[00:52:12] the rolling hills
[00:52:13] I'm there
[00:52:16] you raised me there
[00:52:22] for ages
[00:52:23] and now
[00:52:25] it's himself a little
[00:52:26] bit too late
[00:52:27] so that's
[00:52:29] that's our shows
[00:52:29] I think
[00:52:30] we're gonna ask
[00:52:31] what do you guys
[00:52:32] think is the scariest
[00:52:33] we know what we
[00:52:33] think but what do you
[00:52:34] guys think
[00:52:34] so I'm gonna ask
[00:52:36] the new
[00:52:38] oh my god
[00:52:38] she's screaming
[00:52:39] the hoover
[00:52:39] what like
[00:52:40] in the teletubbies
[00:52:41] he has a name
[00:52:43] I just remember
[00:52:45] being terrified
[00:52:47] of this one
[00:52:48] specific bit
[00:52:49] where they're
[00:52:49] in the house
[00:52:50] and he starts
[00:52:50] hoovering up
[00:52:51] all the like
[00:52:52] you scared
[00:52:52] of hoovering
[00:52:53] cat
[00:52:55] you scared
[00:52:55] of housework
[00:52:58] you are nothing
[00:52:59] better than a house
[00:52:59] cat
[00:53:00] does anyone else
[00:53:00] think that
[00:53:01] Nunu's a weird
[00:53:01] thing to name
[00:53:02] something on a
[00:53:02] kid's show
[00:53:03] is that your name
[00:53:03] no
[00:53:05] you got it
[00:53:06] okay
[00:53:06] alright
[00:53:07] hoover
[00:53:07] hoover was a weird
[00:53:09] name
[00:53:09] yeah
[00:53:10] yeah
[00:53:11] the animated one
[00:53:12] with the tiny
[00:53:13] little
[00:53:13] well it's like
[00:53:14] a weird blend
[00:53:15] of like
[00:53:15] live action
[00:53:16] and then this
[00:53:17] it is
[00:53:18] CGI
[00:53:18] and they've all
[00:53:19] got a new one
[00:53:20] and he's
[00:53:21] doing this
[00:53:22] with kid stuff
[00:53:22] bring it back
[00:53:23] with like 3D
[00:53:23] CGI
[00:53:24] absolutely no effort
[00:53:25] and it's the
[00:53:26] ugliest
[00:53:26] creepiest
[00:53:27] I mean if you
[00:53:28] want to hear us
[00:53:29] complain about this
[00:53:30] listen to any
[00:53:30] of our episodes
[00:53:31] some skilled
[00:53:33] CG artists
[00:53:34] remake that
[00:53:35] with CG bear
[00:53:36] and CG lion
[00:53:37] are you skilled
[00:53:39] CG artists
[00:53:42] how long
[00:53:43] until this becomes
[00:53:45] public domain
[00:53:46] oh a while
[00:53:47] oh a while
[00:53:48] okay well
[00:53:49] I'm gonna ask
[00:53:50] the crowd
[00:53:53] which one
[00:53:53] you think
[00:53:54] was the scariest
[00:53:55] so I just
[00:53:56] wanted you to
[00:53:57] put your hands up
[00:53:57] because I know
[00:53:58] you're not gonna
[00:53:58] want to clap
[00:53:58] so we'll go
[00:54:00] step inside
[00:54:01] I'd like to see
[00:54:02] show your hands
[00:54:03] okay on to
[00:54:04] seven
[00:54:05] great
[00:54:06] um
[00:54:07] Scooby-Doo
[00:54:09] so this is my
[00:54:11] brother who was
[00:54:11] a scaredier child
[00:54:12] who we saw
[00:54:14] you know the
[00:54:14] mummy too
[00:54:16] yeah
[00:54:16] so after we
[00:54:17] saw the mummy too
[00:54:18] he had nightmares
[00:54:19] for months
[00:54:20] he's had nightmares
[00:54:23] at the end of
[00:54:25] his bunk bed
[00:54:25] to look out of
[00:54:27] his bedroom door
[00:54:27] to stare at the
[00:54:28] stairs
[00:54:29] to just make sure
[00:54:30] no intruders were
[00:54:31] coming
[00:54:31] for how long
[00:54:32] two years
[00:54:33] two years
[00:54:34] so two years
[00:54:35] two years
[00:54:36] instead of
[00:54:36] falling asleep
[00:54:37] you were just
[00:54:37] passing out
[00:54:38] at the end
[00:54:38] of your bed
[00:54:39] he was 28
[00:54:41] it wasn't intruders
[00:54:42] I was scared
[00:54:42] about those mummy
[00:54:43] things
[00:54:43] okay
[00:54:46] show of hands
[00:54:47] for Teletubbies
[00:54:48] I win
[00:54:48] and I love
[00:54:49] to win
[00:54:55] a condom
[00:54:56] I'll have a condom
[00:55:00] with you
[00:55:01] they're all
[00:55:02] so prepared
[00:55:08] to have an
[00:55:08] out of date
[00:55:09] condom
[00:55:09] for this show
[00:55:10] I've been preparing
[00:55:11] for six years
[00:55:13] it's so sad
[00:55:14] I'm so sorry
[00:55:15] sorry babe
[00:55:16] can't use this one
[00:55:17] you can
[00:55:18] why don't you
[00:55:19] just double up
[00:55:20] what because
[00:55:22] two out of date
[00:55:23] condoms
[00:55:23] equals one
[00:55:24] good condom
[00:55:25] I don't see a
[00:55:26] problem
[00:55:26] well you're having
[00:55:28] a shit time
[00:55:29] for one
[00:55:31] would be
[00:55:32] anyway
[00:55:32] so yeah
[00:55:37] no prize for Meg
[00:55:39] great
[00:55:40] great
[00:55:40] so
[00:55:42] thank you
[00:55:43] so much
[00:55:44] for coming
[00:55:46] to our
[00:55:46] live show
[00:55:47] it's our
[00:55:47] first one
[00:55:48] and we hope
[00:55:49] it went well
[00:55:51] we think
[00:55:52] it did
[00:55:52] so yeah
[00:55:54] historic moment
[00:55:55] in this room
[00:55:55] our first live show
[00:55:56] we were very
[00:55:58] nervous
[00:55:58] we were very
[00:55:59] excited
[00:55:59] and the fact
[00:56:00] that you
[00:56:01] filled the room
[00:56:01] for us
[00:56:02] and then
[00:56:03] laughed as
[00:56:04] well
[00:56:04] is
[00:56:05] it really
[00:56:06] really means
[00:56:06] a lot
[00:56:07] so thank you
[00:56:08] we've been
[00:56:08] panicking all
[00:56:08] week because
[00:56:09] Elsie was like
[00:56:10] what is it
[00:56:11] is it bad
[00:56:12] that people
[00:56:12] are about
[00:56:13] to see
[00:56:13] how we
[00:56:14] speak to
[00:56:15] each other
[00:56:15] in the
[00:56:16] confines of
[00:56:17] our own
[00:56:17] flat
[00:56:17] yeah
[00:56:18] because I
[00:56:18] worry that
[00:56:19] people aren't
[00:56:20] going to get
[00:56:20] that it's a
[00:56:21] joke
[00:56:21] because we
[00:56:22] record without
[00:56:22] an audience
[00:56:23] generally
[00:56:23] so much
[00:56:24] nasty stuff
[00:56:25] gets cut out
[00:56:25] as well
[00:56:26] like just
[00:56:27] like
[00:56:27] nasty stuff
[00:56:28] people will
[00:56:29] think we're
[00:56:30] I fully said
[00:56:31] I was like
[00:56:31] I want people
[00:56:32] to know how
[00:56:33] Meg treats me
[00:56:36] how do I treat
[00:56:37] you Laura
[00:56:37] tell them
[00:56:37] you bully me
[00:56:38] I don't
[00:56:40] yeah that I
[00:56:40] leave in
[00:56:41] generally
[00:56:41] yeah you do
[00:56:42] this has got
[00:56:43] nothing to do
[00:56:44] with anything
[00:56:44] but yesterday
[00:56:45] we were on
[00:56:45] the tube
[00:56:45] and I
[00:56:46] yawned
[00:56:46] and she
[00:56:47] shoved a
[00:56:47] straw to
[00:56:48] the back
[00:56:48] of my
[00:56:49] throat
[00:56:50] I have
[00:56:53] an awful
[00:56:54] guy
[00:56:54] straight on
[00:56:56] the train
[00:56:58] awful
[00:56:58] awful
[00:56:59] person
[00:57:00] it's because
[00:57:00] you leap
[00:57:01] over furniture
[00:57:02] to try and
[00:57:02] ruin my
[00:57:03] yawns
[00:57:06] can I
[00:57:07] out your
[00:57:07] dad for
[00:57:08] being the
[00:57:08] reason why
[00:57:09] what
[00:57:09] what's that
[00:57:10] done
[00:57:10] if someone
[00:57:11] yawns
[00:57:11] Meg's there
[00:57:12] with a
[00:57:12] finger
[00:57:13] just to
[00:57:14] ruin it
[00:57:14] it was
[00:57:15] satisfying
[00:57:17] we've just
[00:57:18] got to say
[00:57:18] a few
[00:57:19] thank you
[00:57:19] so
[00:57:20] thank you
[00:57:20] to Alicia
[00:57:21] for making
[00:57:22] up the
[00:57:22] little
[00:57:23] bags of
[00:57:23] sweets
[00:57:23] that you've
[00:57:24] got
[00:57:25] thank you
[00:57:26] so much
[00:57:27] and for
[00:57:27] gifting us
[00:57:28] these
[00:57:28] well done
[00:57:29] for filling
[00:57:30] and folding
[00:57:30] thank you
[00:57:32] to
[00:57:34] ACAST
[00:57:35] who hosts
[00:57:36] the podcast
[00:57:36] thank you
[00:57:37] for
[00:57:38] thank you
[00:57:38] to
[00:57:38] cheerful
[00:57:38] earful
[00:57:39] the podcast
[00:57:40] festival
[00:57:42] they're
[00:57:43] such a
[00:57:44] nice
[00:57:44] bunch
[00:57:45] of
[00:57:45] people
[00:57:45] they
[00:57:45] really
[00:57:46] are
[00:57:46] so
[00:57:46] support
[00:57:47] some
[00:58:05] of
[00:58:15] timing
[00:58:16] hello
[00:58:16] thank you for
[00:58:18] seeing us
[00:58:18] thank you for
[00:58:33] thank you for
[00:58:53] and on shop.purina.de