Trump’s Failure
Steve N Allen (almost) DailyNovember 05, 202610:4114.69 MB

Trump’s Failure

🔊 In this episode:

• Trump’s Failure

• EU Bans Our Crisps

• Take Me Out Takes Me Back

• How to Not Row at Home

Watch Steve: http://youtube.com/@mrstevenallen

Read Steve: https://mrstevenallen.substack.com

Follow Steve: @mrstevenallen on socials

Email Steve: me@mrstevenallen.co.uk with any comments or questions

Tip Steve: https://ko-fi.com/mrstevenallen

Join the Discord https://discord.com/invite/mU9VAdsJ7m


Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

🔊 In this episode:

• Trump’s Failure

• EU Bans Our Crisps

• Take Me Out Takes Me Back

• How to Not Row at Home

Watch Steve: http://youtube.com/@mrstevenallen

Read Steve: https://mrstevenallen.substack.com

Follow Steve: @mrstevenallen on socials

Email Steve: me@mrstevenallen.co.uk with any comments or questions

Tip Steve: https://ko-fi.com/mrstevenallen

Join the Discord https://discord.com/invite/mU9VAdsJ7m


Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

[00:00:00] Hello, I'm Steve N Allen and welcome to Steve N Allen Almost Daily. Hello and welcome to the podcast that gets you up to date with the news in a different way, I suppose. The main news, well this is the latest push notification I had just before starting this podcast. It's about multiple flights across Europe face bomb threats for a second time this week with some planes diverted. This is what looks to be the new war front that no one saw coming.

[00:00:26] The prank war front, everyone's saying we're in a world of hybrid war now, it's not about missiles. You've got drones, you've got cyber attacks, there's people on the networks I work on talking about news have been saying stuff like that. No one was predicting. Of course you've got the new terrifying front of hoax warfare where there's pranks like they call in bomb hoax, they hack the fridges to make your milk go off. Some people have found bags of burning poo on the front doorstep,

[00:00:55] so we do need to watch these Russian bags of poo. Just the other day I had a phone call from someone with a Russian accent saying, yes please, can I speak to Mr. Michael Hunt? And if that's the level of warfare we're up against, I'm feeling better about this. Right, let's do the front pages. Alright, let's take a quick slide through, it won't take long actually, because most of the stories on the front pages are all Donald Trump. Trump faces backlashes, Democrats make history, is the front page of the Times, and although I straight in on my analysis have to say,

[00:01:24] this is one of those Trump losses rather than Democrat gains. I don't think America is necessarily the nation that's really going to fully embrace some of the far left of the Democrats, the ones who are like, oh, socialism used to be a dirty word, and now it's going to be our favourite tattoo. I'm not sure you're going to convince enough of the bell curve, the normal distribution of American voters to get you on that one, but we will see. I've been wrong before. Fascinating to see how Donald Trump was saying, on the way into the election,

[00:01:53] just pretend like I'm on the ticket. That's how he said to vote. And then they lost and he was like, well, I wasn't on the ticket. Don't know who mentioned that. But as I said before, it is fascinating that there is no talk of cheating, not one of those, oh, no, this couldn't possibly be a thing. They've had to take the message. And the loss was about the cost of living, and I hope to goodness they don't find some other way of excusing it, because I want all world leaders to realise cost of living is more important

[00:02:22] than whatever else you think you're faffing around with, because it's all very well for you. You don't struggle with the cost of living like the people who aren't leaders of a nation, the people who aren't politicians receiving whatever money you get. So if cost of living goes up and people are having a rough time, people, it's anti-incumbency. I've been saying this for so many elections and no one wants to hear it. If you're not loving your life, you vote to change the people in charge because you don't like it. And that is what is happening. That's all my analysis, really.

[00:02:52] Guardian Trumped is the way they phrase it. The Daily Mail says, MAGA turns on Trump. There's a Richard Littlejohn piece as well saying a Republican friend of mine tells me Trump's crazy. He's capable of anything now, even starting World War III. Great. Vance turns on Trump. I think they're doing that. I think that one of the big failings, the cost of living comes down to the Iran war. If you can blame that on Trump and then set up like a separate MAGA,

[00:03:20] the non-Iranian war MAGA faction, then you can kind of rebuild from there, which I think that's what they're doing. Front page of the I. Vance blames Trump war for crushing defeat. I just said that. Reborn in the USA. This is on the front page of the Mirror. I disagree with this. They say it was the day Americans stood up to their bullying president and said no to hatred and lies. They didn't mind the hatred and lies that much before the price of petrol went up. So if you've got two situations,

[00:03:51] state one, where there's hatred and lies and cheap petrol, state two, there's hatred and lies and expensive petrol. And the difference between that voting patterns, I don't know. I think it's a bit rum of you to try and pin that on hatred and lies. Like just logically, people tend to care more about prices of things. Lame Donald Duck is the way the Metro calls it in crushing midterm rebuke. To Trump is on the front page of the Financial Times. Is there anything that's not about it? The end.

[00:04:20] Bennett goes with Trump dumped. Oof. No, because all of those words seem toilety, don't they? And now the end is near. Trump faces the final curtain is the way that the stars covered it. I did it mag away is their quote. You've done better puns. Them's your front pages. You know we don't like to talk too much politics. We love a bit of politics here. But often the weirder sides, smoky bacon flavoured crisps could be heading for the chop under Andy Burnham's Brexit reset. Hmm.

[00:04:51] Now, I must admit, I don't really eat a lot of smoky bacon flavoured crisps. But you can prize that pack from my cold dead hand. No, that's give me liberty or give me crisps or give me whatever the phrase is. They could breach EU regulations banning meaty names for veggie grubber. Ah. So look, if you're telling me those Brussels people are coming over here trying to mess with my crisps, I don't like it.

[00:05:18] But a ban on naming things meaty stuff that aren't meat, I do quite like that. Because my missus keeps saying, oh, I've got this, bought something for the kids' dinner. What is it? But it's chicken something or other. And it's not made of chicken, it's made of cardboard. And I would prefer it because I get my hope of something, oh, that'll be nice. And it comes out dry. So actually, oh, I'm torn on this one, horns of a dilemma. Could it, could it somehow have nothing to do with Brussels? Which themselves are not a meaty food. We're onto something here,

[00:05:47] but I'm not sure what. Entertainment news, but a little hit on this story. The TV show Take Me Out could be coming back. Which is fair enough because they, you know, there are no such things as new ideas anymore. They've brought back Blind Date. They've brought back everything, haven't they? So now they're bringing out, bringing back, but host Paddy McGuinness will not be back because you can't employ a bloke to do anything these days. Not since MasterChef. So there's definitely got to be women presenting it. It could be Emily Attack or Olivia Atwood.

[00:06:18] I don't really mind either. I don't think it's going to work as a show now. I'll tell you for why. So that's where someone comes down in a tube and all the ladies there going, you know, no likey, no likey. And they have to turn the lights off. And I think it doesn't matter who you are, you'll come down that tube, the women will look at you and the lights will go out. Because have you seen the cost of the Leckie Bill these days? They didn't think it through, did they? I love this story and I'm not sure why. Look, maybe I'm getting this wrong, but it's in the news that an Iron Age British king

[00:06:47] was actually a woman. That puts your debate about bathrooms into a cocked hat, doesn't it? And Verica was the ruler of the Atrabates tribe whose territory covered much of present day Hampshire and West Sussex. Bournemouth University archaeologists say this around 43 AD that she was a woman and you think, well yeah, because she's Verica. I don't know if you had to guess. Do you think someone called Verica

[00:07:17] is like Veronica, right? It's a woman's name. Do you know what? But these experts at Bournemouth University say some of the clues include her name ending in an A like Boudicca. Yeah, no, literally, can I not be an academic? Because all they've done is looked at someone's name and go, it looks like a woman and they've got like research grants and everything for that. I'll give you another one. Find me some king called Susan and I reckon I'll have a good stab at which one that was.

[00:07:46] I'm in the wrong job here. This is worrying if you live with anyone. If you're not living on your own, this should be important to you. Not cleaning the loo or the kitchen and leaving the bins overflowing cause the biggest rouse in shared houses according to a poll. Now listen, I can't tell you how to have no rouse in your life. But mathematically, I can tell you how to have a reduction of the number of rouse in your life by a third. Because if the biggest causes of rouse are not cleaning the loo, not cleaning the kitchen,

[00:08:16] leaving the bins overflowing. If you go to the toilet in the bin, you've consolidated two rouse into just one big row. Especially if it's the kitchen bin, you could have it all in one easy to sort out row. No one's rowing about the toilet anymore. You're welcome. Let me know how you get on with that in your marriage. Big shout out to Molly May who did a nice. A stressed mum who could not pay for petrol after filling her car burst into tears when reality TV's Molly-Mae Hague turned up

[00:08:46] and paid the bill. Her name is Timney Moy Mills, 33. Her card was declined. So it's not that she doesn't have the money. Oh, I see. Oh, wow. So it was just that she got a bad dodgy card and Molly May turned up and covered the bill for her. Now that's all very well and well done for being a nice person and all that. However, you need to remember I'm from the north. I've been crying in petrol stations ever since it went over 150 a litre and she's never helped me out.

[00:09:17] Admittedly, maybe I don't look as good when I'm crying as Timmy Moy Mills, 33. Maybe seeing a middle-aged bald man crying, really ugly crying as well like a snot bubble forming. No, £1.50 a litre. Maybe that's, maybe that's where I've been going wrong. Anyway, I'll keep trying and I'll let you know my results. I've not really been watching Strictly and it turns out that's quite the common thing these days. Anton Du Beke has denied that Strictly come dancing is in trouble with fewer fans. Not as many people are watching and he says

[00:09:46] it's not as, he said the viewing figures aren't what they were because TV's all different now. He makes a good point. There are fewer people watching TV in general, more people watching me on YouTube than there were last year because I didn't do it last year. But he is right though. Not in the way he means but Strictly's not in trouble because fewer people are watching. Fewer people are watching and it doesn't really matter because it's the BBC. It's not like they're funded on adverts. So he's right. It's not in trouble because unless anyone else invents a show that they want to put on

[00:10:16] they'll keep flogging that dead horse. And that's about all we've got time for for this audio podcast of news. Get yourself subscribed to get more. It would be a pleasure if you sent me a message on social media at Mr. Steve N Allen also, also, no, always nice to hear from a fan. If you're not a fan give it yourself. Don't need it. Go enough going on and until next time. Thank you for listening to Stephen Allen almost daily. This podcast is part of Podomity

[00:10:45] the UK's podcast comedy network. Why not laugh at what else we've got? Visit Podomity.com