WrestleDreaming (Sleeping Booty)

[00:00:00] Alright champolics, wherever you are in the world right now, it's the wrong place,

[00:00:05] unless it's Lester. Get there and be ready for short or combat.

[00:00:11] See me live on February 24th at Lester Comedy Festival.

[00:00:17] Champ Tabulos.

[00:00:24] Ryan Reynolds here from Midwolle with a room for newcomers at the cowboy in Darlington. A P.W.F. live event is about to start and you've been booked for a match.

[00:01:46] But you're stuck. And it's dark. the crowd will be up for it tonight but then footsteps. Two feet, one left, one right. A chill runs down your spine and tickles your bum hole. You slowly turn to face the ginger ninja. Ludd, let's get a few things straight.

[00:04:07] You can't start up, your chest cracks and your arse cheeks quiver like newborn chicks in the nest.

[00:04:12] Finally, this is the moment you've been love you. Come on in! The water's hot! On your way to the ring, you're handed a tall, clear drink by someone you fancy. Whoo! They're fit. They wink at you, you wink at them. And your willy feels funny. The way it used to when you climbed the rope at school in PE.

[00:05:42] Tonight might just be your night after all.

[00:05:45] Yes.

[00:05:46] You puff out your chest and eyes with the chump. You squeeze dick hard.

[00:07:01] You squeeze his back.

[00:07:02] You buzz butt chests until...

[00:07:05] Innesia in the nukas.

[00:07:07] Referee. The drinking of restaurants. Shandy Savage. The hero we need. The man we deserve. The lover you want. Never make sleeping pills and laxatives. Shandy Savage. Coming to the Pub Wrestling Federation as soon as he's finished his logger.

[00:08:20] Somebody stop me.

[00:08:21] Shandy Savage.

[00:08:22] Who? Spear! A spear! Fucking spear him into boxing, dear! But you're blowing. That beatdown really took it out of you. Both men wounded, lined face down in the centre of the ring as the referee starts the ten count. Get up! Get up! You begin to stir. So does powder.

[00:09:40] The ref count reaches seven.

[00:09:42] Seven.

[00:09:44] Seven.

[00:09:45] Dicks first to his feet.

[00:09:46] He throws himself making the tag. You can't walk, but somehow you drag your limp body across the canvas and...

[00:11:01] And...

[00:11:02] And...

[00:11:05] And you want to take a tag? Yeah!

[00:11:05] Get in!

[00:11:07] The PWF universe loves that. Federation with a little bit of help from the ginger ninja fortune favors the brave but loading up on lamp a sander and half a dozen onion barges beforehand clearly doesn't hurt either the medical team aka the bar made tends to your injury with a wet tea towel she's looking at you? They've all seen it before. Ah. Huh? You and the chump here, someone cry out for help. Someone needs her help. You sit up, drop your sunglasses down

[00:13:40] over the top of your nose and peer out to see.

[00:13:43] It's another sexy woman.

[00:13:47] Only this time she's on a paddle board You've got this! Watch out, pinned! Hi, get! You guys are in too close to my feet! You might get a kick in first! As you head towards the weeping beauty, you thrash about like a 16-year-old boy getting his rocks off for the first time.

[00:15:00] Seconds feel like minutes.

[00:15:02] Minutes feel like hours,

[00:15:03] but somehow you made it to the half-eaten paddleboard.

[00:16:02] you were hoping to save. Then...

[00:16:04] Whoo!

[00:16:08] Got the bastards!

[00:16:09] The champ emerges from the icy cold water with a bloody bowie knife between his teeth.

[00:16:14] Oh, that is a knife.

[00:16:17] Around him, a line of dead sharks bob about the surface.

[00:16:20] Their belly slit and their jaws snap as they float about in their own blood and guts. platform, a firm yes to start. Or tap the banner to go to monday.com. Ryan Reynolds here from Midmobile. I'm proud to offer premium wireless for just $15 a month and I'm proud that we have thousands of five-star reviews from customers like Dan D in New York who writes, I am satisfied customer. How can this only be 15 bucks? He wrote it in all

[00:17:42] caps. I needed you to feel it like he feels it. Join you and your partner at the opera. I... um... help me Chatty Hat. Your dog's sitting for a friend, but otherwise you prefer musical adaptations of 80's movies.

[00:19:02] That's okay. Some other time?

[00:19:04] Chatty Hat just works.

[00:19:06] Order yours now.W.F. roster.

[00:20:20] Look around you, you'll notice two things.

[00:20:23] One, it's critical tonight.

[00:20:26] Check out the and Dean. I still don't know which one's which. Next it's the PWF women's champion Jill Lette. Can you hit a woman? Knee smash to the face as you can. The clock is ticking. Tick, tick. At this rate you'll

[00:21:41] never get there in time. Talk, but you don't care. You run up the ladder and hit a swan ton bomb off the top. Whoa! Amazing! Someone had their way to fix this morning. PQA, he gets a super kick to the face face trouble. And so does Harry from Enfield, and a stunner for the credit protector.

[00:23:01] Back that, bitch.

[00:23:04] Five to go.

[00:23:05] Who's it gonna be next? They never beat the corners. Former best friends. Former roommates. Hey, enough of that. They never bend the bills. They never changed the sheets. But worse than that, they never bleached the toilet. You claim your skin marks are baffled scars as you parry the vicious assault from the ginger ninja. One, two, three, four, five karate traps to your chest.

[00:24:24] You're reeling.

[00:24:25] You're finding it.

[00:24:27] Hard.

[00:24:28] Two. Jump. Oh, well done you. Yeah, did really well. Congratulations. Now get a room. The Remada on-corrin Leicester's pretty reasonable piece of breakfast too. Hey, who are you kissing? Dear Mop, self-love is the purest candle of...

[00:25:42] Wrestling with the Jump.