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[00:00:01] And welcome to the latest edition of You Should Have Been Here Last Week, the comedy podcast presented by myself, Steve Gribbin and fellow comedian Paul Ricketts. Aloha!
[00:00:43] Each edition we flash our backstage passes to push open the deceased cracking wooden door to poke around in the elusive recesses of comedy. We take a look at the grafters, the crafters, the show-offs, the shafters, the bright-eyed, the pie-eyed, the steely-eyed, the cannot be denied, the goofers, the roofers, the bulletproofers, the chancers, the romancers, the charmers, the disarmers.
[00:01:09] In fact, anyone that goes to make up this business that we call comedy. And today's very special guest is international stand-up comedian, writer and performer, described by none other than the Spectator magazine as one of the most subversive acts ever. It is the wonderful Christian Schulte-Loh. Welcome. Thank you very much, guys. What a lovely introduction. Wow.
[00:01:36] I mean, normally we start by asking, you know, how did you get started? But I want to ask, what is the German comedy scene like? How would you describe it? Well, it's obviously the joke would be that I am the German comedy scene. But we've made big progress over the years. As you might know, they did send Henning and myself over to the UK to learn from the best, which is you guys.
[00:02:06] There's a very funny English comedian called Don Clark, who's popular in Germany. He's from Halifax. Very, very funny. But he only ever gigs in German. He doesn't do anything in English. He's fantastic. And he's in his, he's just turned 70. So he's like, wow. There is hope for us yet. I'm going to Germany in 20 years time. Some people go and work on cruise ships.
[00:02:35] Others go to Germany, you know, so there's always, there's always hope. Was there, was there a tradition of standup comedy in Germany? Was it more, people tell me it was more slapstick based? Yeah, obviously that has changed a lot. But when I was a kid, so when I was a teenager, standup became a thing in Germany. I would say like in the early mid nineties, a guy called, which is funny because he, his name sounds like Michael McIntyre, but his name is Michael Mittermeyer.
[00:03:08] And he was kind of, he was the first one to make it, make it big, just doing standup and nothing else, you know? And it's funny because he also does gay occasionally does English. And I once, he once told me the story that he was in the UK and he got introduced by the MC as a special guest, you know, ladies and gentlemen, a very special guest, very special guest. Please welcome the stage. And then kind of the MC made the mistake of saying Michael McIntyre. People went nuts. And then it took him five minutes to recover from that. But I think.
[00:03:38] Oh my God. That's brilliant. He was one of the first guys to really do proper standup in the early nineties. I want to say like 92, 93. And I went to see him when I was, when I was still in school and, and it was great because he was, he kind of like broke the habit. Like you said, the slapstick and wig wearing and, and double act kind of like old, old school comedy. And he, all he did was just like talk, you know, about his life, you know, just regular standup. And it then it kind of like paved the way for many others.
[00:04:08] And now it's like, now it's frowned upon, you know, if you, if you do at least amongst younger comics, if you do the old school stuff, it's frowned upon because people want to do like pure standup. And then they call it New York or London style standup as if that wasn't the thing. Yeah. I mean, there was to be, as you've probably said that there's a Halifax style standup as well. It's interesting that they should specifically have those forms of standup.
[00:04:34] What's the difference there between New York and London standup was what's the difference? I think in the UK, you need jokes, you know? Yeah. Yeah. But really, I mean, Steve and Paul, we, because we've like, the first time we get together as a long time ago. Right. Yeah. And I remember that kind of like that era that when we were open spots, you know, and we were just like traveling around the country and doing, I don't know, unpaid gigs after a five hour drive, you know?
[00:04:59] And I remember that, that in that era, it kind of impacted me so much seeing people just having like a super polished set and not getting any money for it, you know? And you would go with like a highly polished 10 minute set and you'd be the funniest person in that town, you know? And you'd still wouldn't get paid. And I feel like that is UK style standup. It's just jokes, jokes, jokes. And that's not even a guarantee for you to make any money, you know? And how, how, how, how much of a privilege is that?
[00:05:29] Yeah. Uh, there used to be a South African, um, promoter that I did a few gigs from and he had a T-shirt printed on it and on it, it said, no funny, no money. And I, I prized that to him. And then one day it was, uh, I did a gig in, uh, I won't, I won't name the town, but somebody stole it. So somebody's got that T-shirt now. Uh, yeah. Prescience. Cause I don't know how, how, how comedy literate is, is the audience of this podcast?
[00:05:57] Will they understand the terms open spot and all that? Yeah. We've, we've, we've hopefully taught them. Uh, okay. Great. All 200 of them. Exactly. And there's a lot of comedians that listen to this. So, uh, they'll get it. Yeah. So I, I remember, uh, once I did like a, um, a 20 minute spot. So a paid spot, 20 minutes are always paid and 10 minutes are unpaid. You know, that's usually the rule as we know. And, and, um, and there was this 10 minute spot and open spots. It was somewhere in the, in the middle of nowhere, really.
[00:06:27] And he was very funny, you know, a young guy from Australia, very doing the UK, you know, and very, very funny. One line, a comic and every Joe, every joke was original and landed and was great. And very, you know, just very funny. And, um, he smashed it for 10 minutes, you know, and then I talked to him afterwards. I said, how come you're not doing twenties? You know, that was an amazing set, you know, so funny, every single joke. And see, he said, and he was a bit autistic, you know, he was a bit on the spectrum. And he said, well, I only have 18 minutes of top notch material.
[00:06:57] You know, I'm not ready. That is brilliant. It's brilliant. And he said, I come back when I have 20, you know. Oh my God. You just tell him a few, you know, tell jokes slower. That's all he needs to do is to get to 20. I mean, can I just ask as well, what, what are the audiences like in Germany, the comedy audiences?
[00:07:22] So I would say like, because I just said the word comedy literate, I think that is the biggest difference between in my experience between the British scene and the German scene is that most audiences in the UK will have seen standup before, you know, so they're in front of you and you know, they will have seen standup. They have seen ideally a lot of standup. And in Germany, you still get some audiences that haven't seen much standup, at least not live, you know, that might've seen it on the telly.
[00:07:46] And, and obviously the younger generation, they have seen a lot, but like the older generations, some of them have never really seen like a proper standup show. And so it's you, you, you're dealing with an audience that is, that might still laugh about a really hack joke. And then if, but you don't want to do the hack joke because you're like, I'm a comedian. I, I know better than doing the hack joke. Yeah. So, no, so I think that's the biggest difference.
[00:08:10] And that's what I appreciate most about gigging in the UK is that you, you do know people, they're almost like policing. The audience are policing the acts, which I think is great. So you don't get away with a cheap, uh, like old and hacky joke because the audience will not let you get away with it. And I like that, you know? So what did you pick England? Because you could have picked, uh, anywhere. I mean, you could have even gone to New York and done New York style comedy. Why England?
[00:08:37] I, it was out of, um, a kind of like a coward, um, position of being a coward. I think because I, when I was, I, as a teenager, I wrote a standup, you know, when I, like I said, I, I, I went to see it live. It was a new thing and I loved it. And I was like, I want to do it. I've always known. And now I feel like there's a thing, you know, going on. So I could actually be a part of it. And then I wrote bits that I still have on my computer when I was like 16, maybe 15, 16 years old.
[00:09:03] And, um, obviously they, they're shit, you know, now reading them now they're shit. But, um, I, when I read them, I see the idea I had, and then I, I was not brave enough to do it because I was like, what if people see it? You know, I, you don't want to have a witness when you do your first gig. No witnesses. And, um, I did a semester abroad. So I studied in Germany and I went for one semester, I went to Belgium and everything there was in English. So the whole university thing was in English or, or the, um, well, everything.
[00:09:33] Then I went to a gig in Dutch in, um, in Belgium and, um, I watched the gig, didn't understand most of it, but then I asked the promoter afterwards, is it okay for me to perform here in English? And he said, are you an experienced act? And I said, of course I am, you know, you need to get your foot into the door somehow, you know? Yeah. And, um, and then he gave me like a seven minute spot or like two weeks later or whatever. And I wrote this stuff. And that's how I started in English by sheer coincidence ever being a coward for not doing it in Germany.
[00:10:02] And I felt like broad, you can, you know, like English tourists, you know, when they go to Spain. So no rules apply when you're abroad. We all know that. So I, um, I could just get away with it here. And then I met some English comics there. I met Nick Ravel. You remember Nick Ravel? Oh yeah. We've had a good, yes. Yeah. Oh, great. Yeah. I love Nick. And I met him there. Um, this is like in the early two thousands and I met him and then we started talking.
[00:10:30] I met other English comics and I was like, I need to go to London at one point, you know? And that's what happened. So it was, it was kind of, I never doubted that London would be the final destination for me. Until I went to Liverpool at Manchester. I thought maybe that would have been an option too, you know? It's always interesting to us to talk to anybody that does it in a, you know, is not in their native language. It's an incredible feat. Um, I mean, it, how does that work?
[00:10:59] I just, I'm just interested in the sort of, you know, do you feel more comfortable doing it in German or, you know, are you? You know what? It's so strange because people ask that a lot, you know? And then I, um, I remember, well, you're a great interviewer, Steve. I don't want to take away anything from me. I don't want to hear that question. I've been asked this question a million times. Oh yeah. Yeah.
[00:11:22] No, but I, um, I feel like the, um, I, because I only knew standup in English for the first 10 years or so, you know, I started in, in English and then I did it in English only for like 10 years or so. And then it was a strange shift towards my, uh, my native language. When I was asked to do gigs in German, I was like, but hang on, how, how do I do it? You know, what's the stuff I would talk about? What's the material? Uh, what's my persona and all that, because I was in England, it was easy.
[00:11:49] You know, I was the German guy observing British culture, being a guest, being, you know, an insider from the outside. And, um, and then in Germany, who am I, you know, what am I going to talk about and what's my style and all that. And what if I make a slight mistake, you know, because in English it's charming, right? If you're a foreigner, you make a mistake. And, um, in your own language, it's, it's just, it's a bit strange, you know, if you can't speak properly and all that. And then, um, I, but I did, it did work out. Okay.
[00:12:19] The first gig I remember, and I kind of translated some things and I came up with other stuff, but I felt it was much in a way. It was much easier for me in English in the beginning because I didn't think about it. I just did it. I felt like, wow, this is great. I just can, I can do what I want. Um, you know, I'm a, I'm a guest here. I can just be fun. And I can be the odd one out, you know, because you're on stage. Yeah. Everybody's English or most people are English, some from Canada, but then you're the only, you're the exotic guy, you know? And that's always a great position to be in. I think. Yeah.
[00:12:49] So do you think in English when you're performing in English? Yeah. So then when you're performing in German, are you still thinking in English? In the beginning? Yes, but not anymore. Like, so now I do work more in Germany than I do in the UK and it's kind of like shifted over the pandemic a bit. But I am in the beginning, I was like, I look at my old notebooks, you know, I have like a, like we all do it all. Every comic has like boxes full of notebooks and notepads.
[00:13:17] And, and I went through the, some of the old notes and I was like, oh man, this is all in English. Even the, the, the periods that I spent in Germany started gigging over here. Um, I felt like it's, I still wrote all my ideas and thoughts were in English, you know? And then that kind of gradually shifted more towards a mix of both. I would say some jokes only work in one language, I think. Hmm. I'm pretty certain that's gotta be true. Yeah. Even though I've never performed in another language. Uh, Spanish as well. What's that?
[00:13:46] So is that the same process or you, have you gone to now, now you think in Spanish when you're performing in Spanish? So, yeah, I lived in Argentina for three years and then I, I'm not doing the cheap joke of having relatives. I was just thinking of doing it yourself. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. No, no. They were, they were communists. They had to, they had to leave. So. Yeah.
[00:14:12] No, but I, I, I lived there for three years and, um, and I did, I was like, I wanted to stand up here as well and try it out. And it was like, it was exciting because not many people did it and it was kind of new and, and it was good fun. But it was, that was way harder for me, way harder. I felt like in English, I could just, I was fluent. So I could just speak, you know, whatever came to mind. And in Spanish, I had to prepare my sets because my Spanish wasn't at the same level yet. And, um, I felt like that, that I think doesn't work for stand up.
[00:14:41] But if you need to write everything and rehearse it and then bring it out, I think for me, it's not natural enough. You know, I feel like stand up needs to be conversational and, and witty and in the moment and ideally no filter, you know, but if you have to write everything and then rehearse it, there's too much going on. I think, yeah, you need to be comfortable, you know, in your, in the language you're performing. I think. I mean, there's some people who even speak in the language, think that that's the only way to do stand up is to actually learn it in front of a mirror.
[00:15:10] But don't you agree that if you like, there are, even if you just UK there in a way, there are different languages that you perform in on there. So, you know, one room is a working class room on a Friday night and that's a different language, you know, a different way of communicating between the comedian and the, and the crowd. And then another room is maybe like a bit highbrow corporate, you know, on a Tuesday night in a beautiful function room with chandeliers. So it's a different language you're using. It's a different kind of like approach.
[00:15:39] So I feel like even if it's just one so-called language, you're still using different ways of communicating. So you always have to adapt, I think. Yeah, I think it's totally right. I mean, it's in fact, I think that's what people pay you for. They pay you to read the room. Right. To make that judgment. So that you can tailor it to the audience. It's always the first step, isn't it? Reading the room. It's like, if you don't do that, we've all seen people, maybe we've done it ourselves, you know, where we haven't read them properly.
[00:16:08] And it's just, it's minor details. And then it just doesn't. Yeah. Yeah. Especially if you come out somewhere, somewhere else and make the mistake. As a well-known comedian said in Southampton, he said, hello Bournemouth. Of course, they hate each other. And he didn't recover from that because they just, boo. But you know, talking about different language, I think the rhythm of comedy is maybe the same. I was once studying in India, in Mumbai.
[00:16:37] And there's a guy on there, he was the rising star of Indian comedy. And he was, he did his set, his whole set moved between Gujarati, Punjabi and English. Right. And it was fascinating to see because the audience was familiar with all three. Yeah. And even though we, he'd often do the punchline in Punjabi, you know, cause that was the main. Yeah. But even then, as we watch it from the side of the stage, all the sort of British acts, you could tell when the punchline was, do you know what I mean?
[00:17:07] And it just was, it went boom. But he said, oh yeah, here it comes. Yeah. Here it comes. But it's fascinating really, you know. Absolutely. It's like music, you know, it's like, it's, you listen to it from the back, you know, and you don't know the language. You always know when the joke's going to come, if there's a tagline or not. The rhythm is just, you know, it's, it's like music. But I feel like if it's well done, it's jazz rather than classical music. Yeah. Yeah. So you don't, it's not always the same pattern, you know.
[00:17:33] I mean, can I just ask, do German audiences, are they well behaved and do they hackle? They don't hackle as much. I encourage them to hackle. So this, and when I do, when I do my solo show that my opening is always about the comparison between my experience in Britain and in Germany. So I encourage them to behave in a British way to, to hackle and to participate, you know, rather than just watch. Because German audiences often they, if you don't tell them, they're often a bit more passive.
[00:18:02] I would say they love it. They laugh and they applaud, but they're a bit more passive. They don't feel like they want to interrupt the show. Like in the UK, everybody in the audience wants to show you. I'm a funny guy too. You know, listen to me. I'm a funny guy, which I love, you know, but like in Germany people often don't do that. And then they would wait until the show is over and then come with a list of notes on a clipboard. So yeah, like you didn't do this right. Yeah. Oh my God.
[00:18:32] But one big difference is Germans applaud. They tend to applaud a bit more than British audiences. I feel like I don't like applause that much because I feel like the rhythm, we talked about rhythm. I feel like laughter doesn't really, you know, take away from your rhythm, but applause often kind of like interrupts the whole flow. And I feel like too much applause. I'm not a fan of them. Too much applause. I just, you know what I mean?
[00:18:58] How you sometimes, you sometimes have an audience where they're not laughing loudly, but they're applauding. They're like, no, no, no, you should laugh. You shouldn't. Well, obviously I mean, laughter better than applause. I mean, you're not going to get no laugh and just the applause break is lovely. I love it. Of course. Yeah. But if, but sometimes you see like, if you see like a dead face and the person's not laughing, but clapping, you're like, no, no, no, no, no. Like you, you as an audience member didn't read the room right. You know? Yeah. It's even worse when they agree.
[00:19:27] Sometimes you could say a joke and they go, hmm. Yeah. Yeah. That's true. That is. Oh yeah. I love it when they repeat the punchline, you know, when they find it so funny that once the laughter has kind of like subsided. You hear somebody whisper the punchline again. Yeah. I mean, I had a gig very much like that last Saturday where it was tough as really tough gig. And at the end they went, they went, Ray.
[00:19:57] But I actually said, where the, where the fuck were you during the sets? Right. A lot of them just sat like this. And then at the end, yeah, we like that. But you know, it's like the old cliche. Are you enjoying it? Yeah. So you just tell your face. Yeah. It was, it was like an audience of 40 or 50 people that grim and then. Yeah. Right. But I think we've all been in audiences as well as a part of the audience when you feel like there's no, it doesn't ignite, you know, there's no kind of like, it doesn't, it's
[00:20:26] not, there's no spark. It's not happening. It's not happening. And I'm enjoying it, but why is everybody so dead? And then if everybody thinks that it becomes a dead audience and afterwards they are like, this was great, but it didn't happen. It just didn't happen. It didn't erupt, you know? Yeah. Interesting. Yeah. Loud people. They need a few loud people, like a spark that ignites the flame. And that's missing. You can have a great gig, but the energy in the audience never really kind of like becomes what it could be, you know? Yeah.
[00:20:53] But that's what, that's why smaller audiences are harder to play because they're more self-conscious about the fact that there's not many of them. And also they can see each other and they're gauging. I mean, we've often talked about this on the podcast, me and Paul, about the way that the audience reaction is almost like an animal, isn't it? Yeah. It's like unpredictable, but they, they've also made up their minds about you within about 30 seconds of you coming on stage. Like collectively just go, okay, we can trust this guy or. Hmm.
[00:21:22] But would you agree that the, I feel like when I, when I analyze what we do, right? I feel like I came up with this, this order of things that the audience does to us and with us and about us, you know? And I feel like, because people always say you have to be funny. Yes. You have to be funny, but I think that's not the first thing you have because you can't be funny first because there's, you have to get to the microphone, you know, and before you get the first punchline out, things will have happened already. So I feel like, I feel, I feel like it happens in this order. I want to see if you guys agree with it.
[00:21:49] The first thing is they have to trust you, you know, they have to feel like when we're in safe hands, this person knows what they're doing, you know? So I think that's the first step. And the second step is they have to like you. So they have to feel like, I find this guy or this, this, this woman, you know, likable and interesting. And then the third thing is, um, you have to make them laugh. They have to find you funny, but I think it's in that order. So funny comes third. Yeah. I mean, that's why it often happens when somebody comes on stage and there's something
[00:22:17] goes wrong with the microphone or technically, or they can't get it immediately. The audience is going, Oh, this person doesn't know what they're doing, even though it's not their fault. But you know, if you sort of go, Oh, you know, then it's a much harder. It's an uphill battle. You can't engage. That's, that's the problem. You can't engage them. If you've got mic problems and it has happened to me, that's probably happened to all of us.
[00:22:44] And you pick up the mic and it instantly starts cutting out, especially on your punchlines and then you, you're looking for technical help and everything's gone. Your energy is gone. The connections gone and it's hard to come back from. Yeah. I mean, I, I point number two is, is an interesting one, Christian, because I always think, yeah, absolutely. They've got to trust you and think that you know what you're doing, but the likability
[00:23:11] thing is something in a way that you as a performer have got no real control over. Yes. You can make yourself likable. Right. You know, it's like that. It's like looking at a photograph of yourself, thinking, Oh, do I look like that? Uh, but in a sense, and it might just be on that particular night. They just go there now. Yeah. And that, I don't know what the answer to that is. It's like, I feel like some days, you know, I feel, and I'm very tall. I'm six foot seven. Right. So I'm very, very visible normally.
[00:23:40] But when I walk through the streets or into a shop or whatever, you know, just in like everyday life on some days I feel extremely visible. In other days I feel completely invisible. Do you agree with that? I don't know. That some days you feel like, man, nobody's seen me. You know, am I, am I, am I, yeah. And then other days you're like, Oh my God, I walk into the room and everybody's paying attention. So it's so strange. It feels like it might be a hormonal thing or where you carry yourself or the way you
[00:24:07] dress or I don't know what it is, but on some days in everyday life, it's not even on a stage, you know, it feels like that. But then imagine on a stage where they're all looking at you instantly and you feel invisible, you know, what a nightmare. Yeah. Yeah. It's a weird thing. It's a weird thing. Cause I did a gig once just after I had COVID. And, uh, so I ended up, I got this gig.
[00:24:32] I canceled a load of gigs cause I got COVID and then someone offered me a gig, uh, four days afterwards. And I made the mistake of doing it, got to the gig and told the, uh, the show runner, I've made a mistake. I don't think I could get through this. I'm really, I'm just getting over the country. And she goes, well, there's no one else here to replace you. So, and so I had lots of whiskey thinking that would help. And then I went on stage and it's just weird that there's a lot, there was something that
[00:25:02] was missing in some sort of internal energy that no matter how much I pretended or acted to have it, it wasn't there. Right. And the audience could sense it. I was emceeing. So by the time I went on the second time, they're going, he's lacking something. Did they express it like that? Or did anyone say it? Not as nicely as that. You're lacking something. That would be a great hackle.
[00:25:32] Two minutes into this. You know what? We think you're doing all right, but you're lacking something. Yeah. Especially if they were like chin stroke about it and something. Yes. I think you're lacking something. Yes. I can't put my finger on it. Yes. I want to go back to that thing about, because a lot of Canadian acts say the same thing that you've said that when they come over here, they can start going, you know, they can comment on British life and go, Hey, what is it with your traffic lights, man? Right.
[00:26:00] But when they go back to Canada, they have that problem of, you know, not being the outsider. So what I wanted to ask is, you know, do you feel that your status of the outsider in British, in the British comedy scene allows you to get away with more saying more stuff than British comedians do? Because I think it does. I think so too. Yeah. But I, but I also think a lot of people read it wrong because they think that I'm an outsider talking about, right.
[00:26:28] I'm really an outsider because you can only do it. That's my experience. I can only do it if I am part of the group, you know, you can't say I've just arrived. Look at you guys, you know, then everybody said, who the fuck are you? You know? Yeah. But if you say I've been in this country for many years and aren't we Londoners crazy and now look at us, you know, but it only works like that. You have to be a Londoner to joke about London.
[00:26:55] You can't, I mean, unless you're from the north and you play that card or whatever, you know, but you can't, I think you can't visit the country and make fun of it, but you can be a part of it and say, I wasn't born here, but I've been here for a while. And oh my God, isn't this crazy? You know, and maybe in a way that people were like, I never thought about it, but you're right, you know? Yeah. So it helps to kind of like maybe have a different perspective on things, but you're not really an outsider. Otherwise people would just hate you. I think what would you say? Yeah.
[00:27:21] I mean, I did see you quite recently at Headliners and Chiswick and you were very, you dealt with the heckler very well, but you're quite rude to them, but they accepted it. I try, I try to, I mean, I try to always be nice and charming, but only rude to people where, cause I was like, you know, how many, you make big people, small and small people, you're big. I think that's, you know, when you, when you have a nurse, an NHS nurse in the front row, I think they could get away with anything because you don't want to make fun of them
[00:27:49] or somebody who cares for the, or whatever. But if you, if you have like a banker or an estate agent and somebody who is just playing the big card, you know, I think you could just, people want, want to see how you make them smaller, you know? The guy you picked on was a hedge fund manager. I know. I know. You said, congratulations. You fucked everything up like this. I think you shook him by the hand and everyone's like, woo! No. Even though it being Chiswick, that's probably full of hedge fund managers. Right.
[00:28:19] Right. But I think, I think it works because of that, you know, it did work because of that because people are like, yeah, he can take, he's probably making seven figures, you know? So you can, but, um, no, but I would never do that to like, to like an Eastern European bar person or whatever, you know, like you can only, you can make them, you have to make them bigger, I think, than they are. But also it does go wrong, but it's only funny. Right. I think we, we are, we, we, we see this every night. It's only funny if it could potentially also go wrong.
[00:28:50] Yeah. Jeopardy. Yeah. Yeah. That the audience wants to feel that there are, it's on a knife edge. Well, yes, they love that. That's the, one of the main appeals of comedy is that it could be crap. And, uh, and that's why every audience think they're the toughest audience you've ever performed to. Yeah. Yeah. It's the worst when people say, uh, uh, weren't we, didn't we make it hard for you? You know? And people say, to me, the, my personal hell is people every night, you know, people come
[00:29:18] to me and say, I normally don't like comedy, but. I thought. Have you saying to yourself, why the fuck are you here? Yeah. I don't. Who brought you? Because obviously you didn't want to come. Do you, do you, do you reckon restaurant owners and chefs get that as well? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I really liked your restaurant. Well, yeah, they do. I mean, I don't normally like tomatoes, but that was delicious. It's that sort of thing.
[00:29:50] But I mean, some of the best moments we were talking about things that are going wrong. Some of the best moments, uh, you know, in all our comedy careers. I was on some with a, uh, a very, I won't say who's who he was, but he was playing Camden Jonglers. And some guy had been an absolute pain in the fucking arse all night and being going, you're shit. You're fucking shit. You are. And then he was, he was emceeing. He made that classic mistake of saying, Oh, well, if you think you're any good, why don't you come up and have a go? And then the audience is going, Oh God, oh God.
[00:30:19] And the guy goes, no, no, no, I don't want to do it. And then the MC thinks, Oh, I've said blood now. He goes, come on, come on. Yeah. Come on. You coward. And then he just like that pulled him like that pulled his arm and his arm came off. Oh, my God. What? It's one of the funniest things I've ever, and the whole audience just went, Oh, it was fucking, it was fantastic. Did they have a laugh? I would have laughed at me.
[00:30:45] Oh, the audience were laughing and laughing and laughing and he was like playing with the arm. Hello, everybody. Oh. But you know that, that bit, that, that absolute split second before they laughed and before it was just, Oh my God, it was fantastic. Fantastic. But I mean, obviously not that extreme, but when things do go wrong, it is funny sometimes, isn't it? Oh yeah. Yeah. It's like, but I admire comics for intentionally sabotaging their own set and I've done it before.
[00:31:15] I think we've all done it, but the best I've ever seen at the Manchester comedy store, which unfortunately didn't exist anymore. Um, and it was, um, should I name him? I would just say it was a very, very good Canadian comic. Um, and this was now a Saturday night. And, um, for some reason, I think it was mother's day or something. It was just mainly women in the audience, but it was very, very female audience. And it was also mainly women on the bill.
[00:31:41] And, um, and then the Canadian guy and me now everybody was having a blast. It was a phenomenal night. You know, fantastic. But of course the women were talking a lot about, you know, female life and being a woman, being a mother and all that. And the audience went for it completely. You know, they loved it. You know, finally one of us telling us what it's like. And it was a great gig. And then the Canadian comic, a very, very good comic. Like I said, I really respect him a lot. And he said, ah, this is, this is watching it on the screen, you know, in the dressing room,
[00:32:10] in the green room and saying, ah, this is just, this is too easy. You know, this is just, this is not good. It's just like everybody's agreeing on everything. And I don't like it, you know? And he just didn't like the fact that the gig was too easy. So he walks on and opens, he was closing the show. You know, he, he walks on and opens his set at an amazing night with a terrible abortion joke, you know, and this joke about abortion and loses of course the entire room, you know, within two seconds. They hated him.
[00:32:40] They booed him, but he's so good that he worked his way back to having a good set. And he ended it. It was just like the loudest applause of the night. You know, it was a crazy, they loved him. And then he came back and I talked to him about it. He said, yeah, I didn't like it. It was too easy. I wanted to sabotage the gig and if I could rebuild it. And that's, to me, that's just, that's pretty much a pair of insanity and genius. Yeah.
[00:33:09] In one minute, you know, unbelievable. But it was, it was amazing to watch. Amazing. So it's eight, eight minutes or 10 minutes of absolute silence and hatred, you know? And, and then the next 10 minutes was constantly getting louder and louder to the point where it was just erupting, you know? Unbelievable. Because one of the things I did notice about you is that you do a lot of MC in which I think is improved you as a act.
[00:33:34] Because one of the things that people always impressed about you, okay, do it in a foreign language, but you can also riff. Hmm. Yeah, thanks. Thanks. Thanks. I am. I did that intentionally. Many, many years ago. This is like ages ago. I spoke to, to all the promoters that booked me at the time. And it wasn't that many. It was in the early, early years. And I, I spoke to all the UK performer, uh, promoters that booked me. I said, can you only book me as an MC for the next, I don't know, 12 months or whatever.
[00:34:03] And they were like, yeah, it's actually good because we're looking for MCs, you know, we don't have that many compaers. And, and so all I did for, I wouldn't say like a year or so was when mainly compaer gigs. And, uh, because I wanted to improve that, you know, like the kind of like the riffing and the, uh, the, the ad lib and the crowd work. And it really worked. I feel like it did help a lot, you know, and, but also I didn't write a lot of material in that time because I was mainly focusing on that.
[00:34:29] But if in terms of like skills, I think it was a good school to go through. So if, um, comedians who are just starting out or listening to this, I would highly recommend that. Even if you feel like you're not the crowd work person as a, as a beginner and you always want to polish your set. I feel like it's a really good way of, of becoming more comfortable in your own skin on stage, just going out there and, and, and I'm seeing a lot of gigs, you know, I think it, I think it really helped me. I mean, everyone's different, but would you, would you agree that it, that it does help with your act?
[00:34:59] Oh God, yeah, I think totally does. I remember seeing the difference once you did that year. It was, uh, you were a different act afterwards. Oh, thanks. Yeah. But you do a lot of MCing, right? Paul, I've seen you MC many, many times. Yes. I don't think it's had that effect on me. No, no, you're great. You're a great MC. I remember this gig that we did at the drama club in help me. What was it? Bracknell. Bracknell drama club. Yes. Under the car park.
[00:35:25] And, uh, I remember getting the gig and it had already started and, uh, you were MCing and I expected the gig to be a bit slow and a bit, you know, on a Tuesday night or whatever it was. And you were smashing it. You were standing on stage with a pint in your hand and actually smashing it. They loved you. And, um, then there was another act on, and then we had an interval and whatever. And we spoke and you were like, Christian, I'm just having so much fun. Is it okay if I can, if I do a bit longer, you know? And I said, yeah, of course, you know, we'll have a drink afterwards anyway.
[00:35:57] And I was watching you and you were smashing it. It was so, so good. And then we had, um, we went, I went on much later and I missed one train the next train because we got drunk after the gig and we stayed there and we had a blast, you know? And I remember watching you, I watched almost your entire performance as an MC and it was just amazing because you were, I think you were the star of the night, you know, they loved you. And we were just filling the gaps between your set and you were just so relaxed because you were holding a pint. I remember this. I have the image in my head.
[00:36:26] You were standing there with a pint, holding it like from the top, like normally only a very kind of like intense person would do. You know, when you get to a pub and you see a person hold a pint from the top, you know, like I better stay away from that guy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You were holding it from the top and then having the microphone in your other hand, of course, and it was just so relaxed and you seemed relaxed. You were relaxed. You were sipping your beer. Perfect.
[00:36:53] And it was just an energy thing, you know, like we said earlier, is it, are you visible? Are you not visible on that day? You were so visible. They loved you, you know, and you had just had the perfect energy for the room and you smashed it. Well, bring him back again, actually. Christian, you can come back. Any time you want. Blatant. In fact, I bet you, by the way, at the end of that gig pool, somebody came up to you and went, here, you're really good. You should do this properly. They did. Of course they did. Everything about doing stand up like the other people. Yeah.
[00:37:23] Yeah. You're good enough to be a comedian. Sure. But of course, before that, they would have said, I normally don't like comedy. Bye. Bye. No, I normally don't like MCs. Right. Yeah. But you're the best. Do you know what? This is a true story now. And I don't normally MC. I'm not very good at it. But I did once compare the comedy store and there was a very, very well known person. I'm not going to say who they were, who's now very, very famous.
[00:37:50] And I was quite new to comparing and they had a terrible gig and I couldn't resist it. And they weren't very nice. And I just said, it's not as easy as it looks. Oh my God. And do you know what? Sometimes I wake up at night thinking about that because they were looking at me from the box and they've now become to be, went on to be a massive star. And they have got their revenge on me about three or four times since. Wow.
[00:38:19] It just goes to show she'd never be mean as a compter. No. Or as a person in general. Yeah, that's very true. Yeah. Right. Have you never back announced anybody in a mean way, Paul? Yes, I have. I've done it. I've made the comment about someone. When I do gig with him, he does remind me and I still feel bad about it. There used to be a terrible, well, it was a gig in Brighton and the compter used to come on in. I won't say who it was. And they used to do that thing which was mean as hell.
[00:38:49] They go, we've got four acts on tonight. Three of them are going to be good. One's going to be shit. You be the judge. And then, I know, horrible, right? And then of course, all evening, it gets worse. It goes like, well, the audience is thinking, is it this one? Or even worse, they were thinking, do you think we've seen the shit? We've seen the shit one already. We're not sure. That's a good way of looking at it, actually. Oh God. But yeah, that was neat.
[00:39:18] Quite a few times as an MC, after an open spot regularly, like I would say most frequently, I would then explain to the audience what an open spot is as a means of telling them that they don't count tonight. You know, because don't judge the night based on this person who's not getting paid, who's just here to be seen and who didn't have a good gig because they were nervous or whatever, you know, or they've just started out.
[00:39:44] And then I think that's an elegant way of doing it, of just saying, look, not everybody's getting paid. Some people are showcasing. It's much nicer to say that than to say, yeah, I know that was a bit shit, you know, but let's move on. I mean, a certain well-known chain of comedy clubs who shall not be named, but they used to force the comp to say before they brought the tryout spot on that they were trying, which I just think is mean.
[00:40:10] You know, there's no need for it because all that, then you've already planted the seed in the audience's mind. Oh, they're going to be nervous. And yeah, there's a much better way of doing it by just saying the next act is only doing a short spot, you know, and then you just leave it open and people understand it if they are into comedy. Yeah. But yeah, but always be nice, you know, as an MC, but then easier said than done, because as an MC, you're kind of like you're the face of the night, aren't you? Yeah.
[00:40:36] So in stage and they're like, in a way it's your night and people are like, if the acts are not good, they think you've booked them. Yeah. One last little story for a final question about, I think you were at this gig. It was the booker who was, I think, MC in the night at the end of the night came up and then said, I think you've heard about one of my comics being a pedophile, which turns out to be a comic that he actually managed.
[00:41:06] He had his own agency and the story had come out about one of his comics being a pedophile. Yeah. And because it happened that day, he then went up on stage at the end of his own night and said, I know you've heard about one of my comics being a pedophile. And I just want you to know that I've dealt with this situation. And everyone was thinking, well, which one of the comics on the night? We were all sat there at the side of the stage and the audience, about 300 people just going, which one? Which one is it? And was it a kids show?
[00:41:39] I wish it had been. Oh, my God. Yeah. No, that was actually happened. Yeah. Jesus Christ. Future of comedy. What do you think it is? It's constantly changing, isn't it? The way you, I mean, the stage is not changing. I mean, what you do on stage is not changing. It's just the way people kind of like perceive it when you, when they're not in front of a stage that's changing. Is it more TV streaming, TikTok, Instagram? Yeah.
[00:42:03] Now it seems to be, it used to be crowd work videos online and now it's, it's shifting towards like graphics with the jokes on them. And so that would probably always change. And I have no idea where that's headed. Um, but I feel like the, the stage experience and the offline experience and the analog experience, that's always going to be there. I feel like the, you go, you go into a room full of strangers and you're just going to have a blast for two hours or however long it takes. And I think that's never going to change. I feel like people are drinking less.
[00:42:33] That's changing. Um, that changes of course, the, the, the, the night as well. But, um, I would say, I want to say that however AI is going to knock us out. Um, it's, it's not going to affect, um, the kind of like the enclosed kind of like encapsulated experience of being in a theater or in a club. And I want to believe that that's always going to be there. And that the, the, the crazier the world becomes, the more there's a need for that, for that kind of like fleeting experience.
[00:43:00] You know, if you don't capture it, turn off your phones, don't try to kind of like, um, uh, carve it into stone. It's just there. It's fleeting. It's two hours. And then that's, you had to be there. You had to be there last week. That's what we want people to say. What a way to end. Oh, thank you for being on Chris. It was fantastic. Yeah. Thank you guys. Great. Yeah. Take care. Bye. So that was Christian Schultz. Uh, very good discussion.
[00:43:30] That very, uh, quite philosophical points there about the, uh, the nature of the audience, et cetera, isn't it? Very interesting. Hmm. Yeah. Well, and also about a persona, what it is and how to project it or do you project it? Is it something intangible, which I think sometimes it is. I think the more you, uh, in a strange sort of way, even though there are also comics who are very mannered, uh, and it works for them. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
[00:43:59] And there's no, obviously, uh, having done this podcast now for nearly three years, you know, there's no final answer to any of those questions. Is there really? Yeah. I mean, I knew that before we even did the podcast. We'll have to ask that German comic who's got a very similar name to Michael McIntyre. Oh, Michael Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, was it? Is it? Michael Michael Michael. Yeah, it is. Michael Michael Michael. He's got a whole bit of, has anybody got a mandra?
[00:44:29] Don't let me slag off for a racket time. No, no, you won't. He's good. He's good. He's great. I'm only, I'm only just, uh, yeah. The only thing I hate about him is he doesn't, he doesn't watch this or listen to this podcast. That's, that's the only thing I've got against him. Unlike, unlike you good people that are looking now. Yes. Looking and listen, you're the ones we care about even more than Michael McIntyre. We care about you. Yeah, we do.
[00:44:54] And your responsibility is to like, share, uh, tell your friends, send us money. Any other things you can add in? This is your part. Um, well, I mean, actually, could you actually, uh, get recording and send it out simultaneously everywhere, all over the world at once. Mm. Even to people that you don't know, you've never noticed, but just press send on it. And then just like, you know. Yeah.
[00:45:23] I mean, the other thing I could do is come around my house with a pint of milk. Cause I need some for me tea, which I'm going to have after this. So if somebody, somebody, somebody, somebody, somebody, somebody, somebody, somebody, somebody, Yes. So you're all right. I'm not going to ask you to come around with a pint of milk. I want the listeners and viewers to do it. Yes. Go get around Paul's house now. Yeah. Stop being so passive in your, you know, where you were enjoying this entertainment. Add something to it. Stop being passive aggressive with your non likes.
[00:45:53] With your mouse hovering over the like thing. Oh, I don't know. I don't know if I'm going to do it. Do it. Please do. Yeah. Watch us. And listen to us. Yeah. We're going to say goodbye now. We're going to put more calls to action just at the last minute. We'll say goodbye, but do the things we've asked you to do. Do it.
[00:46:14] This podcast is part of Podomity, the UK's podcast comedy network. Why not laugh at what else we've got? Visit Podomity.com.